{"id":27531,"date":"2021-03-01T10:25:49","date_gmt":"2021-03-01T15:25:49","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/debmillswriter.com\/?p=27531"},"modified":"2021-03-01T10:47:29","modified_gmt":"2021-03-01T15:47:29","slug":"monday-morning-moment-the-story-of-a-girl-and-friendship","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/debmillswriter.com\/?p=27531","title":{"rendered":"Monday Morning Moment – the Story of a Girl and Friendship"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>[School Days, Cairo, Egypt – a couple of decades ago]<\/p>\n

This delightful girl has a birthday today.<\/p>\n

I want to celebrate her here. The girl and the understanding of friendship she has brought to her mom and to those who have best known her.<\/p>\n

She was born on a windy March morning. Our first-born. I have brothers, and my Mom had all brothers. Having a daughter as our first was a complete joy and wonder to me, as my Mom tells me I was for her in the midst of all boys.\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

She would be my sidekick for many of our early adventures together. Welcoming two brothers during her preschool years. Enjoying the friendship of neighbors and church family. Homeschooling in East Tennessee. \u00a0 \"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

I will never forget the Spring when she came home from Jack and Barbara Lavender’s Sunday School class with two tiny cups of growing seedlings. We planted them in her daddy’s garden and they grew an enormous bed of Cushaw<\/a> squash. From those two little seeds. Sweet memories of friends who invested in our girl’s life. \"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Then there was the terrible time when she got desperately ill with what we would, over too many days, finally discover to be a ruptured appendix. This girl has always had a high threshold of pain, and it took four trips to the pediatrician’s office before I was taken seriously. She ended up with big surgery and 10 days on IV nutrition. This image shows her having her first meal over a week after her surgery (pillowcase from our friend, Kay – she still has this pillowcase).\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Then our travels outside East Tennessee began.<\/p>\n

For this quiet girl, having her life, and childhood friendships, disrupted was hard. Despite the incredible experiences of many moves across four countries, she learned resilience the hard way.<\/p>\n

In those days, before smartphones, we carried our memories of people and places in tangible ways. Photo albums. This girl would often go deeper with new people in her life by introducing them to her previous life…through these cherished photo albums.\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Everywhere we went, everywhere we lived, we have the photo memories of the sweet parts of those years. They are a treasure.\"\"<\/a>\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Friendships were not always easy for this girl. Well, not being able to easily make friends, adjusting to all the changes imposed on her life by her parents’ work moves. She was not the life-of-the-party, center-of-attention, making things happen, people magnet sort of girl. She loved books and they were often her friend. In the reality of multiple moves and too many goodbyes.<\/p>\n

She did have two constant friends who went through all those moves with her. Her two brothers. They are still close. Remembering all the good, all the tears, and all the big sister times with her [calling her “Auntie” when she observed and advised where they preferred to be left to their own devices].\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

As this girl grew up, she learned how to recognize mean girls<\/em><\/a> and not to take them personally nor to become one…which can easily happen for any of us in strained situations. She learned to embrace the new and sift for where she belonged in the different. And could even make a difference.\"\"<\/a>[Her tiny Senior class, 2005, Casablanca, Morocco]<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>[Noor, a dear friend from high school, knowing the experience and also understanding what it’s like to move places and countries with your family]<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>[Maria, a fellow student and enduring friend as they both tackled teaching together. Different schools but similar challenges.]<\/p>\n

Besides her brothers, this girl had two men she knew she could count on. Her Dad…and in time, her beloved whom she would marry. I love to catch snippets of conversations she and her Dad have on visits home. For two introverts, their words pour out with each other…safe people, safe places.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>[This girl and her boy who would capture her heart and parent two little ones by her side – no pics of the littles – this girl’s preference and I honor it]\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

In this season of making a home and family, she has grown into this beautiful woman (OK…if you’re still reading, you either love her or the idea of her or you have such a her in your own lives). I am in awe of this girl. Not because she is anything of celebrity but because of how she handles today’s bumps. Also how she has taken both the bad and the beautiful of her growing up years and turned them into her own story.<\/p>\n

This Christmas\u00a0 she gave me a book by Sarah, Sally, and Joy Clarkson<\/a>. Girls’ Club – Cultivating Lasting Friendship in a Lonely World<\/em><\/a>.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

This sweet girl has recommended Sally Clarkson<\/a> to me often in the last year as a mom and mentor in life. In the book above, Sally’s daughter Sarah<\/a> writes a chapter entitled Saturday Mornings: The Girls’ Club Prototype. <\/em>In this chapter, she describes “five progressive actions…central to the powerful cultivation of friendship”. They are:<\/p>\n