{"id":31248,"date":"2023-01-01T22:27:03","date_gmt":"2023-01-02T03:27:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/debmillswriter.com\/?p=31248"},"modified":"2023-01-07T15:47:06","modified_gmt":"2023-01-07T20:47:06","slug":"5-friday-faves-new-years-resolutions-habit-planner-year-end-review-word-for-the-year-and-the-last-days-of-2021new-year-resolutions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/debmillswriter.com\/?p=31248","title":{"rendered":"5 Friday Faves \u2013 New Year\u2019s Resolutions, Habit Planner, Year-End Review, Word for the Year, and the Last Days of 2022"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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[Adapted from the Archives<\/a>]<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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2022 is rapidly winding down. Whew! to finish out the year, these Friday Faves can help us get ready for the new year\u2026hopefully a joyful one!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1) New Year\u2019s Resolutions \u2013 <\/strong>2022\u2026the end is in sight. What do we do with this new year ahead? Do we revisit those habits we thought about changing up in this year? Maybe so. Or maybe we didn\u2019t alter course so much for good reason. Let\u2019s give pause a moment and consider\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Photo Credit: David Lose<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

I take New Year\u2019s resolutions seriously. They have served me well through the years in shaking up troublesome habits as well as galvanizing better ones. New (or restored) habits that nurture the body, the spirit\u2026.and, when possible, family and community.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

New Year\u2019s resolutions are not always exercises in futility. They can be excellent pathways to a strong start into the next year. Some of my family and friends treat resolutions with disdain\u2026they never work; they never last. Oh, but not always!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They can be super energizing. Whether we meet our goals or not, there is great promise within the resolution for resetting our thinking. A keen sense of self, or self-awareness, aids in our understanding of habits and true habit change.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Without knowing it, I have actually used a practice of habit change that Ken Sande<\/a> writes about on his blog, Relational Wisdom 360<\/a>. He first influenced my life years ago with his work on conflict resolution through his Peacemaker Ministries<\/a>. He is a gentle guide in many of the issues that complicate our lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

His article on Seven Principles of Habit Change<\/em><\/a> came at a great time. Sande talks quite kindly about how we develop habits and what it takes to change them. His first principle of habit change gives us a look at the cycle of habits \u2013 the cue, the routine (or response), and the reward<\/strong>. I have actually followed Ken Sande\u2019s principles below (without knowing the wisdom of it).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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  1. Every habit has three parts: a cue, a routine, and a reward.<\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n
  2. You can change an undesirable habit by keeping the cue and reward but learning a new routine.<\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n
  3. The best way to overcome the temptation to revert to old routines is to have a detailed action plan.<\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n
  4. Habit change builds momentum if you can change a single \u201ckeystone habit\u201d and then continue to build on consecutive \u201csmall wins\u201d.<\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n
  5. Will power is like a muscle: it can be strengthened and yet needs to be exerted strategically.<\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n
  6. Faith is an essential part of changing habits.<\/em><\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n
  7. Habit change is more likely to occur within a community (even if it\u2019s just two people).<\/em> \u2013 Ken Sande<\/a><\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n

    Self-awareness is a huge factor relating to habit change.<\/strong> I can see that more now having come through seasons of looking at my own habits.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cSelf-awareness is defined as conscious knowledge of oneself; it\u2019s a stepping stone to reinventing oneself, learning to make wiser decisions, and helps you tune into your thoughts and feelings. So often we place blame on externalities because it\u2019s the easiest excuse, when in fact we should be thinking about our thinking, reflecting, trying on different perspectives, and learning from our mistakes.\u201d<\/em> \u2013 Paul Jun<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    It is possible to affect true habit change if we are willing to take a studied look at ourselves<\/strong> \u2013 our awareness and our engagement with making choices\/decisions, singularly and within relationship. I used to think that self-awareness was morally charged, i.e., it drove us to become more self-centered. That doesn\u2019t have to be the case. When we take time to really examine where our minds go, through the day, we can train our thinking toward what matters most \u2013 related to people, resources, and life purpose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    New Year\u2019s Resolutions and Reality Checks<\/em> \u2013 Wally Bock<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    When we are willing to do that, New Year\u2019s resolutions can become much more transformative than just a few weeks of good intentions. These habit change principles can apply to anger issues, pornography, other addictions, and pretty much any habitual process that negatively affects your work, relationships or general peace of mind.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Five years back, our pastor Cliff<\/a> at Movement Church<\/a> challenged us to commit to some resolutions to the Lord\u2026together [podcast of 12\/31\/2017 here<\/a>]. That was such a pivotal exercise that I have kept the resolutions made that day in a visible place, to be reminded of the good change in life, and the struggle\u2026 Still in view\u2026five years out. Still relevant to now. For 2023, on it again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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    Jonathan Edwards<\/a>, the great 18th century preacher and theologian, definitely understood the importance of praying through and writing out resolutions that would inform his daily life. Over the course of several months, he composed seventy resolutions for life. You can read them here<\/a>. The five resolutions I made during church on a New Year\u2019s Eve are weighty enough for me\u2026can\u2019t imagine 70! Edwards just gives an example of a man who, even as deeply devoted as he already was, did not want to miss God in a busy life of ministry. Nor did he want to miss the people God placed in his life.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Resolutions help us to keep the main thing the main thing. Sure, we may struggle to keep our bodies and houses in order. Those are temporary situations. Where we hope most to be successful is in keeping our hearts tuned to what matters most. Going deep with God and others. Even with the continuing threat of COVID.<\/strong>..if we are ruthless and wise, and don\u2019t give in to another year of listlessness and waiting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Resolved \u2013 The Resolutions of Jonathan Edwards<\/em><\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Do You Want to Change Your Habits?<\/a><\/em> \u2013 Relational Wisdom \u2013 Ken Sande<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Habit Change is a Team Project<\/em> \u2013 Ken Sande<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Seven Principles of Habit Change<\/em><\/a> \u2013 Relational Wisdom \u2013 Ken Sande<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Make Habits, Not Resolutions<\/em> \u2013 Justin Whitmel Earley<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Why Self-Awareness Is the Secret Weapon for Habit Change<\/a><\/em>\u2013 Paul Jun<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    RW Acrostics in Action<\/a><\/em>\u2013 Relational Wisdom \u2013 Ken Sande<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Ten Questions for a New Year<\/em> \u2013 Don Whitney \u2013 Desiring God<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Need Help With Your New Year\u2019s Resolutions?<\/em><\/a> \u2013 David Lose<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    New Year\u2019s Resolutions After a Year as Lousy as 2020? There\u2019s One I think We Need More Than Ever<\/em> \u2013 Heidi Stevens<\/a> – This is a great read about being stone-catchers – protecting the most vulnerable from the stones thrown at them.<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    2) Habit Planner \u2013<\/strong>Anyone who knows the writing of Justin Whitmel Earley<\/a> knows his commitment to a life well-lived. He is determined to live intentionally, not leaving the substance of his life to outside powers or sloppy habits.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    \u201cUnlike resolutions, we actually become our habits.<\/strong> There are no changed lives outside of changed habits. And if we want to actually change, we need to take a sober look at where our habits are leading us.\u201d<\/em> \u2013 Justin Whitmel Earley<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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    \u201cHabits are the little things we do over and over without thinking about them.<\/strong> And the tiny and subconscious nature of habits makes them powerful. Why? Because they create our \u201cnormal.\u201d<\/strong> Normal life is what stays with you from January through December. Normal life is what shapes your kids, your body, your schedule, and your heart.\u201d<\/em> \u2013 Justin Whitmel Earley<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    His two books \u2013 The Common Rule<\/em><\/a> and Habits of the Household<\/em><\/a> \u2013 lay out a simple path for examining our current lives and then setting strategy for habit change. So accessible and engaging whatever our preferences for methods are. If spreadsheets help, he has one for you. If you need a more fuzzy-boundaried approach (that would be me), you can glean from his wisdom, and alter course accordingly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Below are his own examples of the habit planner. I appreciate his heart so much. He helps us all he can (in his books and free resources):<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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    Photo Credit: Justin Whitmel Earley, Screenshots<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Habits of the Household \u2013 Habit Planner \u2013 pdf<\/em> \u2013 Justin Whitmel Earley<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Make Habits, Not Resolutions<\/em> \u2013 Justin Whitmel Earley<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Unlock the Power of Family Habits in 2022<\/em> \u2013 Justin Whitmel Earley<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

    3) Year-End Review \u2013 <\/strong>Business writer Stephen Jones<\/a> shares author Tim Ferriss\u2019 practice of doing a quick past year review<\/a>. Ferriss prefers this over new year\u2019s resolutions, and Jones gives a quick snapshot of his 5 steps.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    Below<\/a> is Tim Ferriss\u2019 guide for a past year review from his own blog (and podcast):<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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    1. Grab a notepad and create two columns: POSITIVE and NEGATIVE.<\/em><\/li>\n\n\n\n
    2. Go through your calendar from the last year, looking at every week.<\/em><\/li>\n\n\n\n
    3. For each week, jot down on the pad any people<\/strong> or activities<\/strong> or commitments<\/strong> that triggered peak positive or negative emotions for that month. Put them in their respective columns.<\/em><\/li>\n\n\n\n
    4. Once you\u2019ve gone through the past year, look at your notepad list and ask, \u201cWhat 20% of each column produced the most reliable or powerful peaks?\u201d<\/em><\/li>\n\n\n\n
    5. Based on the answers, take your \u201cpositive\u201d leaders and schedule more of them in the new year. Get them on the calendar now! Book things with friends and prepay for activities\/events\/commitments that you know work. It\u2019s not real until it\u2019s in the calendar. That\u2019s step one. Step two is to take your \u201cnegative\u201d leaders, put \u201cNOT-TO-DO LIST\u201d at the top, and put them somewhere you can see them each morning for the first few weeks of 2022. These are the people and things you *know* make you miserable, so don\u2019t put them on your calendar out of obligation, guilt, FOMO, or other nonsense.<\/em><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n

      We do a year-end review but not in order to plan out the next year. Mostly to celebrate the year rapidly coming to an end and to reflect on how we might reorder the course of the next year (re the negatives).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      4) Word for the Year \u2013<\/strong>Two years ago, I read Debbie Macomber<\/a>\u2018s book One Perfect Word<\/em><\/a>. She tells fascinating stories of persons\u2019 choosing a word to guide their year. Finishing her book and praying a bit, the word compassion <\/em>became my focus. 2021 was a good year for that as we dealt with so many divisions over COVID, race, politics, etc. Compassion<\/strong> for all on both sides of each issue.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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      At first I wasn\u2019t going to do \u201ca word\u201d for 2022, and then a rapid series of \u201ccoincidences\u201d drew me to the word: joy<\/strong>. As 2021 ended, I had become negative and even a bit cynical. Still having faith in God but not so much in humans, including myself. Even after a year of compassion!!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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      It dawned on me that I hadn\u2019t been \u201ccounting it all joy\u201d<\/em><\/a>. Or remembering that \u201cthe joy of the Lord is my strength\u201d<\/a>. My heart was resolved to be set on joy in 2022\u2026no matter what.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      Lord, help us to be people of joy,<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

      to notice joy in this day and to hope for joy in days to come,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      to look for light and share it with others this Advent season,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      to see beauty in creation and the people we encounter,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      to laugh heartily with childlike glee,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      to feel true joy in your presence.     Amen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

      Now looking at 2023…what word? For awhile, I thought the word would be persevere<\/strong>. Dave and I both agreed that perseverance is essential but did I want to make it my word of the year? Prayed that one down. Then in the last several days, the Lord keeps bringing the word wonder<\/strong> to mind.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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      In the start of 2023, I’m studying Tyler Staton<\/a>‘s book Praying Like Monks, Living Like Fools: An Invitation to the Wonder and Mystery of Prayer<\/a><\/em>. During this Christmas season, the song I Wonder as I Wander<\/a><\/em> stayed with me for days.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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