Tomorrow, May 7, marks 5 years of writing this blog. May 7, 2014.
Writing has always been a part of how I processed life. As a little girl, I had the little pink lock-and-key diary. Certainly better that it is not to be found. Then journaling in high school and after. Teaching in a university required research and writing. When the children were little, my writing had to downsize to quick notes in their baby books and daily entries on a big wall calendar.
After moving overseas, so much new happened each day and insisted on being documented. I would send long “journals” home to Mom, Mom-in-law Julia, and those others closest to us.
In 2014, it seemed that my memory was not as good as before. It was a scary season and one pooh-poohed by my doctor. He reassured me that my memory had its normal (for my age) robustness and not to worry. Still, I thought about the kids and decided maybe some things should be written down.
My Mom died in 2002, and it wasn’t even 5 minutes until we had questions that only she could answer. It’s over 15 years now since she died, and I still miss her every day. What I also miss is all the knowing she had…all the history, the memories, the funny and sad stories. She lived an incredible life, triumphant through extreme poverty, resilient after failure and loss, tenacious in making a home for us all. She was a lioness with cubs.
Sometimes we come too late to the realization that the generations before had great insight. I learned so much from my Mom, but could have learned more. Now, my memories of her, and the stories she told, and the wisdom she imparted are a precious treasure to me. You will hear her voice in mine.
Mom and me
Mom was born during the Great Depression. She was excruciatingly poor growing up. Yet, she pushed through her circumstances. I want to write about her. And I want to write about so many things…God, people, culture, beauty, family, lessons learned and lessons still to be learned.
All my adult life, people have told me “You should write a book.” Maybe because of our travels, or maybe because of something else…I’m not really quite sure. It’s my Mom who should have written, but she would never. She wouldn’t think she had anything to say that should be memorialized in print. I am of a different generation. I am writing…because of her…and for me…and hopefully for another generation. We’ll see.
Either I’m slowing down or the weeks are speeding up. Fridays come fast, and my posting on Friday’s is challenging. Thanks for hanging in there with me, Friends. Here are this week’s favorite finds:
1) For the People – If you like TV law shows, For the People is one of the best out there. An ensemble cast with incredible chemistry and older counterparts to learn from and act with…Photo Credit: International Business News
The writers are clearly well-researched on the law and the judicial system (at least in New York City where the show is based). The dialog is riveting…the subject matter penetrating. Impossible to come away from this show unaffected. Even if it is just a TV show.
2) Nurse & Teacher Appreciation – This coming week is both Nurse and Teacher Appreciation Week here in the US. May 6-12 this year. Across our lives, we owe a great deal of gratitude to both teachers and nurses…in our own lives and that of our children’s.Photo Credit: Vanguard Promotions
A few days ago, a state senator (who will remain nameless) balked at supporting a bill that would require uninterrupted meals and breaks for nurses. She stated that nurses probably played cards much of the day. Wrong! We don’t always get the attention we would like from nurses (because of the needs of other patients), but it isn’t because they are lolling away their shift.
In high school, I was trying to choose between nursing and teaching as a career. Nursing won… My daughter is a teacher. Two very demanding careers and amazing people within those professions.
Shout-out!
3) Fluoroquinolones Toxicity Awareness – A couple of years ago, I experienced a medical emergency. It was terrifying and I would have taken any treatment to recover as fast as possible. While waiting on blood culture results, the doctor, thinking I probably had pneumonia, prescribed Levaquin (Levofloxacin). In the first days of taking the drug, I became weaker and weaker. An odd weakness. Like I could not lift my arms or legs normally. As if they had just lost all strength. The cultures were inconclusive for pneumonia, but he told me just to finish the course of antibiotics. Confused about my symptoms, I started reading about the adverse toxicities of Levaquin. Muscle weakness was a more rare reaction, but not so rare that it had become alarming to the Food & Drug Administration. It has required the drug manufacturers to publish alerts, to both prescriber and patient, of the possible dangers of these drugs.
Levaquin is one of the antibiotics in the fluoroquinolone family. These antibiotics are highly effective but potentially highly toxic as well, with adverse reactions which can be irreversible. Another commonly prescribed antibiotic in this drug family is Cipro.
As I write this, just hours ago a 37y/o woman, Rachel Held Evans, died of complications of a bizarre allergic reaction to antibiotics given to her for a urinary tract infection and flu. What drugs were they? No information there. Just can’t get the possibilities out of my mind…
I’m a strong believer in the medical model and have experienced excellent care through the years. Still…these drugs scare me. I now have them on my “Allergic to” lists on my medical record.
5) A Legacy in Cancer Support – In my adventure in downsizing or decluttering, I came across a box previously stored in Dave’s parents’ attic. It had been there since we went overseas in 1995.
It contained memorabilia of my season in nursing focused on supporting cancer patients and their families (in Kingsport, Tennessee). Professional journals (I was once a contributor and also on the editorial board of Cancer Nursing). Books on cancer survival. Cancer nurse retreat folders. Support group pictures. Cassette tapes of soft music and comedian routines. Notes from lectures/talks I’d given in the old days (transparencies instead of powerpoints!!). Those were different days.
I passed a baton in those days…when my life turned a corner, leaving behind a career I loved…for another I would love as well.
That baton is still being carried by another nurse…my partner in those days – still clinically sharp, innovative, caring, and able. When I think of the nurses that should be celebrated next week, Kathryn Visneski is at the top of the list. Appreciate you, Friend.
That’s it for this week. Thanks for spending this bit of your weekend with me.
God has arranged each one of the parts in the body just as he wanted. And if they were all the same part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, but one body. The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” Or again, the head can’t say to the feet, “I don’t need you!” On the contrary, those parts of the body that are weaker are indispensable. And those parts of the body that we consider less honorable, we clothe these with greater honor… God has put the body together, giving greater honor to the less honorable, so that there would be no division in the body, but that the members would have the same concern for each other. So if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; if one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it. Now you are the body of Christ, and individual members of it. – 1 Corinthians 12:18-23a, 24-27
Have you ever felt out of place? Awkwardly fitting in your family or workplace or church? 1 Corinthians 12 gives us a beautiful picture of how God intended for each of us to have a place. Within the Body of Christ. Where we belong, where we are known, and where we should magnificently fit.
A dear friend of ours, Dave Lyle, is a storyteller. He was our dad’s pastor, and he treated Dad as a good friend. When Dad wasn’t able to attend church anymore, Pastor Dave would still visit and catch him up on news and pray with him and for him. Dad never had to wonder if he had a place in this world, even in his 90s, when his pastor came around.
With his permission, you will read a story Pastor Dave recently shared on his Facebook page. It says a lot about how important it is to communicate to people that they matter…just as they are.
***HE’S NOT YOUR TYPICAL GUEST AT CHURCH, BUT HE’S WELCOME ANYTIME***
Roger came to worship with us, again, at church last night. He’s our friend and happens to be homeless. He looks the part and acts the part, although not dangerous at all. He’s actually a very sweet guy, and smart. Of course, there are reasons he is homeless, and we are not going to change it by analyzing, or preaching. And he won’t take money. I don’t think he needs it- he seems to always have a new project going, and the ability to fund it. Anyhow, I’ve stopped trying to explain Roger to other guests who show up at the same time. I talk with him as a friend, shake his hand, hug him if he will let me. It seems that Roger thinks he is normal, and the rest of us are maybe a bit strange but he loves us anyhow. And he keeps coming back. One time I set out to find his home place, searched far and wide and finally found him living in a dilapidated van behind a warehouse. He was proud to show me the dwellings- his bed, how he cooked and stored things. As he understood it, he was the security for all the businesses in the vicinity. I guess it was a nice gig?
I am learning more with every passing day that, foremost, you are to love people. Yes, change them if you can, lead them to Lord if you can. But before and beyond all the heavy stuff, consider him or her to be a person of value who is worth the time and effort to just hang out with and to get to know. And so, Roger fascinates me. He puzzles me and frustrates me, and I like him.
When worship was over and it was time to leave, he walked by a table at the front of the sanctuary and saw some baby bottles. I told him they were being used to raise money for a local medical clinic for expectant mothers. He made some catty statement about how they waste the money, rambled on with incoherency for about 30 seconds- typical Roger stuff. And then he pulled out a crumpled ten dollar bill and stuffed it in the bottle. You just gotta like the guy! – Pastor Dave Lyle
Now Pastor Dave is probably never going to lead a megachurch or write a bestseller (although he could!)…BUT! He has shown himself a the best sort of servant of God in loving people as they are, seeing their value in the Lord’s eyes. He makes a place for them in the church and points them to Jesus.
The wind is moving
But I am standing still
A life of pages
Waiting to be filled
A heart that’s hopeful
A head that’s full of dreams
But this becoming
Is harder than it seems
Feels like I’m
Looking for a reason
Roaming through the night to find
My place in this world
My place in this world
Not a lot to lean on
I need Your light to help me find
My place in this world
My place in this world
If there are millions
Down on their knees
Among the many
Can you still hear me?
Hear me asking
Where do I belong?
Is there a vision
That I can call my own?
Show me I’m
Looking for a reason
Roaming through the night to find
My place in this world
My place in this world
Not a lot to lean on
I need Your light to help me find
My place in this world
My place in this world
Looking for a reason
Roaming through the night to find
My place in this world
My place in this world
Not a lot to lean on
I need Your light to help me find
My place in this world
My place in this world
Looking for a reason
Roaming through the night to find
My place in this world
My place in this world*
I’m thankful for all those through my life who, led by the Holy Spirit, made a place for me. Often, our first glimpse of God is through the love of another – a parent, a teacher, a pastor, a friend.
Tauren Wells‘ song “Known” gives us another look at what it’s like to belong…truly belong…and to be fully known and loved by God.
Songwriters: Ethan Hulse, Tauren Wells, Jordan Sapp
“To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear. But to be fully known and truly loved is, well, a lot like being loved by God. It is what we need more than anything. It liberates us from pretense, humbles us out of our self-righteousness, and fortifies us for any difficulty life can throw at us.” ― Timothy Keller, The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God
“Lord, love through us. Give us an appreciation for every member of the Body of Christ…as we have seen in the friendships of our brother Dave…with Roger…and our Dad. Then, God, help us remember how You gave each of us a place in Your Kingdom. Show us how to give space to others…those that You bring into our lives…to love them and see them as You do…fully known and fully loved.”
Mom and me
