Then the man and his wife [Adam and Eve] heard the voice of the LORD God walking in the garden in the breeze of the day, and they hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden. But the Lord called out to the man, “Where are you?“ – Genesis 3:8-9
One day in a place where Jesus had just finished praying, one of His disciples requested, “Lord, teach us to pray, just as John taught his disciples.” So Jesus told them, “When you pray, say: ‘Father, hallowed be Your name. Your kingdom come… – Luke 11:1-2
For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who was tempted in every way that we are, yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence [boldness], so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. – Hebrews 4:15-16
What is it that keeps us from praying?
Is it shame or fear? Yet God calls for us to show ourselves to Him. He looks on us with deep compassion.
Is it not our practice? The disciples witnessed both Jesus’ pattern of prayer and His power to live a life pleasing to the Father. They didn’t ask what was His secret. They seemed to know it was his dependence on the Father through prayer.
Is it our sin that makes us too shy to talk to God? He is not surprised at our struggle. He knows our weaknesses and loves us still. We have a sinless mediator in Jesus and because of Him we have access to the Father.
Prayer can be hard for me for all the above reasons. Add to those the weight of so much need in the world, and I find myself too quickly distracted by the world’s chatter. Oh to stay in the quiet of His peace!
So I pray a bit then switch to over-thinking and worry, or drop out altogether to some other cheap substitute to prayer. Nevertheless, because of His long-suffering with His children, He draws us back to Himself, and I return often to that throne of grace. As a child running to my dad…the best dad we could ever hope to have. Father God.
Tyler Staton introduces his readers to writer teacher John Mark Comer. Comer is the founder of Practicing the Way. This is a website with the focus of offering a pathway to becoming like Jesus in community. All of the teaching and resources are free, and I’ve been grateful to God for how He is speaking to me in this space. My hope is to be part of a prayer community in our local church. Pray with me for this. Are you part of such a community?
As often happens, while thinking about the whole practice of prayer in my life, I heard the song below on the car radio. It preached!
Worship with me to the deeply intimate song “First Things First” by the band of brothers Consumed by Fire.
All the things that I have held dear The vanities that whispered in my ear What would I do if they all disappeared Riches and fame and all that they could buy I’ve come to find they never satisfy What would I gain if my soul’s the price
I don’t wanna love what the world loves I don’t wanna chase what the world does I only want you I only want you
First thing’s first I seek Your will Not my own Surrender all my wants to you Keep the first thing first To live Your truth Walk Your ways Set my eyes Lord, I fix my face on you All my desires reversed To keep the first thing first
I give it all My life an offering My heart is yours So have Your way in me Your kingdom’s all I wanna seek
I don’t wanna love what the world loves No, I don’t wanna chase what the world does I only want you I only want you
First thing’s first I seek Your will Not my own Surrender all my wants to you Keep the first thing first To live Your truth Walk Your ways Set my eyes Lord, I fix my face on you All my desires reversed To keep the first thing first To keep the first thing first All my desires reversed To keep the first thing first, oh To keep the first thing first, oh
First thing’s first I seek Your will Not my own Surrender all my wants to you Keep the first thing first To live Your truth Walk Your ways Set my eyes Lord, I fix my face on you All my desires reversed To keep the first thing first, oh To keep the first thing first, oh To keep the first thing first
All my desires reversed To keep the first thing first*
Rejoice at all times. Pray without ceasing. Give thanks in every circumstance, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. – 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Show us your steadfast love, O LORD, and grant us your salvation. Let me hear what God the LORD will speak, for he will speak peace to his people, to his saints; but let them not turn back to folly. Surely his salvation is near to those who fear him, that glory may dwell in our land. – Psalm 85:7-9
Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God proves His love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Therefore, since we have now been justified by His blood, how much more shall we be saved from wrath through Him! For if, when we were enemies of God, we were reconciled to Him through the death of His Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through His life! – Romans 5:7-10
The love of God is something I know and yet something I cannot comprehend.
From my childhood, He has held me close. In fact, because of Christ, somehow I am carved into “the palm of His hand” (Isaiah 49:15-16). Although these words were written by the prophet Isaiah, centuries before Jesus was born, they remind me of the Cross and the sacrifice of love displayed there.
God’s love is not the smarmy, hands-off, “do whatever we want” kind of love. He fights for us. He is always with us. He sees us at our worst, and yet with the eyes of a perfectly loving Father. Ever drawing us away from what will destroy us and into tender fellowship with Him. Rescued. Redeemed. Restored.
This blog has been a platform for me through the years to share the stuff I’ve learned in life, mostly for my children but you are welcome on the journey.
One thing I’ve known and tested over decades of decision-making and executing, for good and for not-so-good: God loves his children. When we choose to wisely – following Him – and when we choose poorly…serving self or seeking the approval of others. God loves us. He is long-suffering with us, helping us up off the floor and out of the ditch. He is our anchor and our shield. He is the source of everything good in our lives.
When I first heard singer/songwriter Andrew Ripp‘s “For the Love of God”, I was enthralled. It could be the soundtrack of my life. Whatever his story is, it resonates…and beautifully communicates…the love of God.
I saw mercy Mercy seated where the judge should be Was guilty Guilty and getting out of jail free How could it be I didn’t get the life I deserved And the only thing that He wanted was my heart in return Every time I think about every time I thought was the end I’m caught up wonder again
Where would I be Where would I be If it wasn’t for the love of God This song of victory is Now mine to sing Hallelujah for the love of God Has set me free
(Hallelujah Hallelujah for the love of God Hallelujah Hallelujah for the love of God)
I was thirsty But like a desert turning to a field of green Started breathing When heaven’s favor took ahold of me How could it be I’m living with an infinite worth Cuz the one I thought I chose had really chosen me first Every time I think about every time I thought was the end I’m caught up wonder again
Where would I be Where would I be If it wasn’t for the love of God This song of victory is Now mine to sing Hallelujah for the love of God Has set me free
(Hallelujah Hallelujah for the love of God Hallelujah Hallelujah for the love of God)
If it wasn’t for my failures and mistakes I would never know the depths of this grace Now my heart is beating for heaven’s sake And for the love of God And for the love of God If it wasn’t for my failures and mistakes I would never know the depths of this grace Now my heart is beating for heaven’s sake And for the love of God
Where would I be Where would I be If it wasn’t for the love of God This song of victory is Now mine to sing Hallelujah for the love of God Has set me free
(Hallelujah Hallelujah for the love of God Hallelujah Hallelujah for the love of God Hallelujah Hallelujah for the love of God Hallelujah Hallelujah for the love of God Hallelujah Hallelujah for the love of God Hallelujah Hallelujah for the love of God)*
Many, O LORD my God, are the wonders You have done, and the plans You have for us—none can compare to You—if I proclaim and declare them, they are more than I can count. – Psalm 40:5
He performs wonders that cannot be fathomed, miracles that cannot be counted. – Job 5:9
Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning. – James 1:17
Wonder has been my word for 2023. Some of our days can seem mundane until we shake off the mental fog and clear our eyes to what is most real – that God is ever present and moving in our lives and through our circumstances. Wonder at that!
From “In the beginning, God” (Genesis 1:1) through the cross of Jesus when he prays“Father, forgive them for they don’t know what they are doing” to his apostle John’s inspired revelation of what is to come – it is all God and He calls us to Himself.
“Hallelujah! Salvation and glory and power belong to our God, for his judgments are true and just.” – Revelation 19:1-2a
If we miss the wonder of God, it is because we have filled our minds with humans as our idols. Frail, faulty humans. We judge God by those persons whom we, at some point, deemed worthy of a pedestal of honor. Should they fall or falter, we then pull away and think they represent a God who fails. Not so!
What is Christianity? If you think Christianity is mainly going to church, believing a certain creed, and living a certain kind of life, then there will be no note of wonder and surprise about the fact that you are a believer. If someone asks you, “Are you a Christian?” you will say, “Of course I am! It’s hard work but I’m doing it. Why do you ask?” Christianity is, in this view, something done by you—and so there’s no astonishment about being a Christian. However, if Christianity is something done for you, and to you, and in you, then there is a constant note of surprise and wonder. John Newton wrote the following hymn: Let us love and sing and wonder, Let us praise the Savior’s name. He has hushed the law’s loud thunder, He has quenched Mount Sinai’s flame. He has washed us with his blood. He has brought us nigh to God. See where the love and wonder comes from—because he has done all this and brought us to himself. He has done it.So if someone asks you if you are a Christian, you should not say, “Of course!” There should be no “of course-ness” about it. It would be more appropriate to say, “Yes, I am, and that’s a miracle. Me! A Christian! Who would have ever thought it? Yet he did it, and I’m his.” ― Tim Keller, Hidden Christmas: the Surprising Truth Behind the Birth of Christ
The wonder of God is that He is so many things that we are not, and yet He gives us a way forward to be more like Him, through the work of Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit. How long-suffering He is; how loving!
Anyone who reads this blog probably knows (or has heard of) the old song “Count Your Blessings”. It is a sweet reminder to exercise our gratitude at all the Lord has done in our lives – “raising my Ebenezer” so to speak.
[I’ve written many times in the past on “stones of remembrance” – raising my own Ebenezer to a good and faithful God.]
Just one example of the wonder of God in my own life is portrayed in the picture below – of my beautiful mom, and precious daughter, and me. My mom had such a hard first marriage that I don’t remember her ever praying a husband for me. Until I was 5 or 6, we were unchurched. Mom had to work so hard providing for us in our childhood that weekends were her catch-up time with house, errands, and us. Church just didn’t happen. Then when neighbors drew us in and church became a beautiful thing in our lives, we all came to faith (and Mom back to her childhood faith which fast became a deep adult walk with God). She gave me a long look into the love of God and the difference knowing Jesus made in a person’s life. I did finally marry and remarkably had children, all of which points to God and His kindness. This picture of us three – all three safe and secure in His love and promises speaks to the wonder of God in our lives.
Just one glimpse of His wonder. Just one on a long list and counting.
God is worthy of our awe and wonder. No matter the situation we find ourselves. He is doing something beyond our imagining. Even in the broken nature of relationships in this world, even in the winding down of all that surrounds us…God is present. We can lean on Him and take hope and courage in Him.
Worship with me to singer/songwriter Brandon Lake‘s Count ‘Em. Get ready for some hard-hitting, Scripture-packed joy at the wonders of God!
Oh-oh-oh, oh Oh-oh-oh, oh
You got thunder in Your vocal, You got flames in Your eyes You got wonder-working power pouring out of Your side Checked the tomb all the way through, the grave was empty inside Ain’t no other pull the greatest miracle of all time
You got power, demons cower when they hear Your name called You got power that still towers, make Goliath look small You got power to devour any counterfeit roar Even Your tongue is a sword, count up the score, You are the Lord
Holy You are the Lord Holy You are the Lord Holy You are the Lord Holy
Hey, hey All those funerals You ruined when You made the dead rise Heaven’s healer using spit and mud to open blind eye You got wonders I can’t number, couldn’t count if I tried Called the doctor and the doctor said, “I’m giving new life Tell your enemies the victory is already here More than sixty thousand angels, just the tip of the spear” One day every knee will bow and every heart will be Yours This is the end of a war, count up the score, You are the Lord
Holy You are the Lord Holy You are the Lord Holy You are the Lord Holy
How many enemies ended on bended knees, swallowed up in defeat? Can’t count ’em How many raging seas opened in front of me? How many victories? Can’t count ’em How many prophecies no one would dare believe? Now it’s reality Can’t count ’em How many broken men given a second chance? See all the lifted hands Can’t count ’em
How many Thomases doubted Your promises standing here, now convinced? Can’t count ’em How many hospitals said it’s impossible? How many miracles? Can’t count ’em How many paralyzed living a different life? Go on and testify Can’t count ’em How many sinners saved? How many bodies raised? How many empty graves? Can’t count ’em
Oh-oh-oh, oh Oh-oh-oh, oh
You are the Lord Holy You are the Lord Holy You are the Lord Holy You are the Lord Holy*
[Adapted from my presentation at a home-school conference – Part 1 on Raising Adults with the focus on work and responsibility can be found here.]
One of the most challenging tasks a parent has is to teach a small child how to be deferential – to respectfully give way to another, to put another first. Whew! This is a hard one. It’s not just about helping a child understand sharing. It’s our demonstrating and them seeing the value of people and taking hold of how we can serve or help them, no matter our age. Not for any reward for ourselves but just because others matter.
The battles of will that communicate “Me, me!” or “Mine, mine!” can wear us out – both parent and child.
In Part 1, we talked about work and kids’ discovery that they can make a difference. Work and exercising responsibility are their own reward. Often there is compensation, but work is a head issue – a decision made to insert ourselves into a situation for the good of all (both the worker and the larger community).
Serving is a heart issue. In the role of the server, we do ultimately benefit, but the whole focus is on the one served. Serving, by its nature, requires sacrifice, sometimes small but, even for a child, it can be substantial.
Before we dive in, let’s pray to wrap our own hearts around this. [I’m coming at this as a Christian, but this, by no means, lessens the import for those who don’t believe. The wisdom of raising adults to serve stands.]
“Father, we want to be wholly Yours. Whatever You ask of us…we want to be ready and willing. Not only to be laborers in the Harvest, but to serve with the same heart and mind that Jesus had while He walked this earth. Humble, loving, deferential to others. A servant heart, a mind bent toward You, God, a body and life laid-down in love for others. We want to be responsible and to do good work. Teach us to take our hearts even higher…or lower as the case may be…to serve as Jesus did, in Your abundant grace. In His name. Amen.”
When we model and teach work, the mindset or worldview we communicate to our children is “Get it done and done well”. In action and attitude.
“Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus: Who, existing in the form of God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped but emptied Himself, taking the form of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to death—even death on a cross.” – Philippians 2:5-8
“He has shown you, O mankind, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you but to act justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?” – Micah 6:8
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility consider others as more important than yourselves.Everyone should look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.” – Philippians 2:3-4
What if, along with leading our children to be responsible, we created a culture of serving? What would our homes be like if our kiddos embraced serving as a good thing and something they were capable of? And not just for a jelly bean or a favorite TV show.
Lisa Jacobson, author, encourager and mother of 8 has a lot to say about her own experience of creating a culture of serving:
“I did things right. The way things should be done. Oh, and, of course, I was serving my family all the while. I was the sacrificial mom who cooked, laundered, and cleaned up after everyone. Most every job was done by me.
And, as a ‘shining model’ of service, I figured my children would eventually follow my example. It was obvious that I worked hard and did my best to please our family. So wouldn’t they just naturally follow in my footsteps? More is caught than taught, right? But you know something? They didn’t catch on like I thought they would. They really enjoyed being served…and it kind of stopped there. I was a good giver. They were good takers.” – Lisa Jacobson
She then discovered how to teach her children the joy of serving others:
Start by letting them work [serve] alongside you.
Teach your children to notice what needs to be done. [This one point is so worth your time reading thus far – both in working & serving – guiding our children to see, for themselves, what needs to be done. It’s a strong beginning to winning their hearts.]
Let them enjoy helping out.
Instruct them in how they can be a help to you [and others].
“God does not need your good works, but your neighbor does.” – Martin Luther
Author, educator, and pastor Andy Crouch writes about our callings in life. He is speaking to Christians, but these would richly apply to anyone who believes in God as Creator.
To bear the image of God. [“Be fruitful & multiply.” Our human calling is inextricably linked with the family where we first found our name, language, identity, and home.]
To restore the image of God. [Our distinctive calling as Christians is to actively seek out the places where that image has been lost, to place ourselves at particular risk on behalf of the victims of idolatry and injustice. So in every workplace, Christians should be those who speak up most quickly, and sacrifice their own privileges most readily, for those whose image-bearing has been compromised by that organization’s patterns of neglect. In every society, Christians should be the most active in using their talents on behalf of those the society considers marginal or unworthy. In every place where the gospel isn’t known, Christians should be finding ways to proclaim Jesus as the world’s true Lord and “the image of the invisible God.”]
To make the most of today (contingent calling). [If you get the first two right, the third is practically an afterthought. Your third calling is your contingent calling: to make the most of today, while it is called today. “Contingent” is a word used to describe something that could be otherwise—in that sense, it’s the opposite of necessary. It’s also used to describe something that depends on something else—in that sense, it’s the opposite of independent. You are in some particular place today—maybe at school, maybe on a bus, maybe in a workplace, maybe at home. And you are there with certain resources—memory, energy, reason, attention, skill. All these are contingent. It is God within these that we must learn to discern and then serve as He leads.
[Heady topics for a 2 y/o maybe…but highly teachable concepts, as well…how would we teach and model these three callings to our little ones?]
“There is one topic that I’m extremely interested in that the writers of Scripture do not seem interested in at all—and that topic is, actually, me. I am quite interested in the expressive individual that I call me—but Scripture turns out not to be interested in me hardly at all. It is somewhat more interested in me as a member of a community, connected to one of the “nations” of the earth—but really, what Scripture is interested in is God, God’s mission in the world, God’s commissioning of a people, and God’s gracious invitation to me to stop being so interested in me and start being absolutely fascinated by [Him and] his mission.” – Andy Crouch
How do we cultivate a culture of serving in our home, community – for ourselves and our children? What are you doing? What do you dream of doing? Please share in Comments below. Thanks.
As with work, so with service, we not only model but insure our children have the opportunity to contribute what only they can do – for others…whether operating out of their strengths or their weaknesses.
Looking back, I don’t think we were intentional in creating a culture of serving in our home during our kids’ childhood. It was just “easier to do it myself”, right? They had so little time, between schoolwork and their other “just being children/youth” activities. There were moments, however, bright and shining…teachable moments where they did see how serving mattered…especially when they (at whatever age) showed up to serve. Now I hope to come alongside our grown-up children to model and teach serving to the grands. In fact, it is already a reality – seeing our kids, as adults, discovering the deep joy of serving others, pushing through the awkward strain to pull back or be less present, putting others ahead of themselves.
[Nathan helping dear Mrs. Marge…many years ago.]Photo Credit: AZ Quotes
Enoch walked with God; then he was not there because God took him. – Genesis 5:24
By faith Enoch was taken away, and so he did not experience death. He was not to be found because God took him away. For before he was taken away, he was approved as one who pleased God. – Hebrews 11:5
“His lord said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant; you have been faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.’” – Matthew 25:23
“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” – 2 Timothy 4:7
A dear friend of mine died last week. Nabila Massoud. I knew her by her family nickname FonFon. She was Egyptian, a widow and mom of two daughters, a physician, a beloved sister, a grandmother, and a beautiful friend. Most importantly, she was a faithful, devoted follower of Christ. From a very early age.
I can’t believe she is gone. I will never forget her. One day, because of Jesus, I will see her again.
We have known each other since 1995, when our family moved to Egypt and moved into her family’s building in Nasr City. She taught me so much about how to live well in a city that would become home to us. How to speak Arabic, how to understand and honor Egyptian people and their culture, how to do family life and hospitality, how to navigate around Cairo, how to pray and worship in another language, and how to trust God’s promises in hard days.
FonFon was a rock for me. I loved (love) her so much. She knew my mom and dad, and Dave’s as well. I also knew hers and spent time with her extended family. We celebrated our children’s birthdays and successes. We were family. Hers and ours.
This has been a really tough year for FonFon. Her daughter Dina (in image below on right) became very ill and would finally die. She, like her mom, had a beautiful way about her and a deep faith. FonFon was actually a patient in the same hospital as Dina in those days for she also had become ill. Three months after Dina died, FonFon would die.
What a Homecoming that must have been for her. To be with her Lord, with family who had gone before, and with her precious Dina.
[Sarah, FonFon (Nabila), and Dina – Beautiful mom and daughters]
Young Sarah, FonFon’s other daughter, would be there for both her sister and then her mom in those days of passing. Thanks to livestreaming, we were able to hear Sarah speak in tribute to both her sister and then her mom, with God’s strength to carry her through all the emotion. I was so proud of her.
My life has been so impacted by this family and especially this dear friend. Only one year older than me.
Enoch (in verses above) was spared dying. He walked with God through his life and then God just took him Home. Although FonFon had to endure through an illness that never abated, she went through it as she had passed through her whole life…with her Savior. Well done, Dear One! Welcome Home.
[Below is an excerpt from FonFon’s obituary.]
Nabila Massoud, or Fonfon as most people know her, was truly one of a kind. One of the most amazing people you could have ever met. She was always leading by example, putting others first, extending help to those in need no matter how big the sacrifice, and she had one of the most wonderful smiles ALL the time, in the toughest of times.
Fonfon, looking back at your life, the short years you spent with us on earth, makes us know that no one has an excuse to lead a miserable life or lose their faith no matter what hardships they face. And the reason is simple: you did it.
You endured the hardest of circumstances all through your life, and you always came out stronger, with more faith and with a big smile on your face. Your life and love for the Lord will always be an example and source of inspiration to many.
We love you and will always miss you, until we meet again!
“He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” Revelation 21:4 – Obituary of Nabila FonFon Massoud
Worship with me to a great Gospel song – One Day. One line especially reminds me of FonFon: “I wanna get so close to Him that is’ no big change, on that day that Jesus calls my name.”
Some days drag. Some days fly Some days I think of the day I’ll die Some days fill me and some days drain And one day Jesus will call my name
One day Jesus will call my name As days go by, I hope I don’t stay the same. I wanna get so close to Him that it’s no big change, On that day that Jesus calls my name
Most days I pray but some days I curse. It’s that number of days I put myself first. But it’s not what I do, the cross made that plain. And one day Jesus will call my name
One day Jesus will call my name As days go by, I hope I don’t stay the same. I wanna get so close to Him that it’s no big change, On that day that Jesus calls my name
One day Jesus will call my name As days go by, I hope I don’t stay the same. I wanna get so close to Him that it’s no big change, On that day that Jesus calls my name
One day Jesus will call my name As days go by, I hope I don’t stay the same. I wanna get so close to Him that it’s no big change, On that day that Jesus calls my name
One day Jesus will call my name As days go by, I hope I don’t stay the same. I wanna get so close to Him that it’s no big change, On that day that Jesus calls my name
On that day that Jesus calls my name On that day that Jesus calls my name*
“I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.” – John 15:5
In the South, where I’m from, the small-time farmer (gardener really) strives to have at least one of his vine tomatoes ripe and red by July 4. That first delicious, sun-warm tomato for the Independence Day burger or BLT.
Dave did it! Out of all the huge green tomatoes bowing the vines down, one turned red just in time for July 4. Along with several cherry and grape tomatoes. Yum!
The branches bearing the tomatoes are so heavy that they pull the vines over. So much so that they must be staked up to hold the weight. If the branch is severed from the vine, for whatever reason, the tomatoes rot. Without the nourishment from the vine, they die.
In John 15, the Apostle is quoting Jesus speaking on our relationship to Him. He is the vine and we are the branches. As we stay close to Him, He will do in our lives what we need – to be sustained ourselves and to bear His fruit…much fruit as we stay close. It is pretentious for us to think we are responsible for all the good that comes from our lives. Anything of lasting value, anything with eternal significance, is produced through abiding in Christ. Praise God for that…we stay close and He does wonders!
I think of those branches straining under the weight of the ripening tomatoes. They may break. The vines themselves may not be able to withstand the growth depending on them.
Not so with us or our Savior. As we follow and trust Him, receiving all He has for us…as we cling to Him, we will receive what we need to endure under the beautiful burden of much fruit. He will not bend or bow. He will do what only He can do in the Father’s vineyard. He will give us what we need always – from the first breath of the morning and through our rest in sleep each night.
A devotional written by Marshall Segal that accompanied the release of the song says, “Jesus did not mean that we would be unable to walk or work or watch Netflix without Him. He meant that we would be unable to do anything real or meaningful or lasting – anything that pleases God. We might live for sixty, seventy, or even eighty years, and yet accomplish nothing, live for nothing, die with nothing. Most people do.”
We can make it through a full day without once acknowledging the Lord. We can do our jobs well, we can love our families well, and we can be kind to our neighbors. However, the fact is, whether we acknowledge it or not, it is only by the grace of God that we have a job in the first place. It is only by the grace of God that we have been blessed with a family. It is only by the grace of God that He has put a roof over our head and ordained great friendships with those whose paths have crossed ours.
Marshall Segal goes on to write in his devotional, “Sometimes abiding in Christ will feel like dying with Christ. But anyone who dies with Christ – who abides in and obeys the crucified King – will also be exalted with him.”(Philippians 2:9-11; Ephesians 2:6)
We have all experienced some type of hardship in this life. We have all experienced or been near friends and loved ones that have walked through heartbreaking trials. Some of us are experiencing more suffering than others. In John 16:33 Jesus reminds us, “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” – Chris Jamison
Take heart. It’s harvest time. Hold on to Christ. He will hold us fast!**
And a voice from heaven said, “This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well-pleased.” – Matthew 3:17
For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen. – Romans 11:36
The high priest questioned Him, “Are You the Christ, the Son of the Blessed One?” “I am,” said Jesus, “and you will see the Son of Man sitting at the right hand of Power and coming with the clouds of heaven.” – Mark 14:61-62
When the Son of Man comes in His glory, and all the angels with Him, He will sit on His glorious throne. – Matthew 25:31
Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. – Hebrews 12:2
How do we even speak about the glory of God as reflected through Christ? The triune God – Father, Son, Holy Spirit – has been from forever and forevermore…One. Such glory. That glory shimmered in front of the world as Jesus walked close to humankind for those years of public life. God the Father gave him to us, and Jesus gave the Holy Spirit to the church.
The Son of God participated in the creation of the world and is found throughout the pages of Scripture, from Genesis to Revelation. Always pointing to the Father. In intimate relationship with both Father God and the Spirit of God. We know about depth of love and relationship through examining that of the Lord Jesus.
In fact, at the very beginning of His public ministry, before all the miracles and his sinless walk before God and the people, and before the assaults to His character and personhood, God the Father was already well-pleased with Him (Matthew 3:17). The perfect love of God, the most glorious attribute of His, was lavished on the Son…the verdict was in from the beginning. Jesus’ performance in this life was not counted in this love.
“God proves his own love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” – Romans 5:8
When we receive Christ as our Savior, receiving forgiveness for the sins that separated us from God…the sins for which Jesus died…we enter into His glorious kingdom, both now and forever.
After the crucifixion, resurrection, and ascension, Jesus sat down at the right hand of the throne of God the Father. Jesus sat down. His redemptive work is finished. Yet, He continues to intercede for us with the Father. We are not forgotten. No, we are perfectly known and remembered.
Life for us here is to follow in His steps…and give glory…until the day we see Him face to face. Hallelujah!
You slept beneath the stars You named and numbered Were tempted in a desert You designed You faithfully obeyed the law You authored The King left His throne behind
Verse 2 You washed the feet of those who called You Master And fed the multitudes with truth and bread You shared the feast with harlots and with sinners And loved those who sought Your death
Chorus 1 Glorious Lord, You are glorious Shepherd and King, forever You’ll be glorious
Verse 3 Without a word You faced the accusations And joyfully You bore the bitter cross The Innocent received our condemnation And paid for the rebel’s cost
Chorus 2 Glorious Lord, You are glorious Shepherd and King, forever You’ll be glorious Holy and here with us Let every heart declare that You are glorious
Verse 4 Beneath the earth You fashioned You were buried The Word of Life was silenced by the grave But doors of death could not contain Your glory Our God rolled the stone away
Chorus 2 Glorious Lord, You are glorious Shepherd and King, forever You’ll be glorious Holy and here with us Let every heart declare that You are glorious*
“Even now, Jesus is seated on the throne of His father David at the right hand of God. This means that He is ruler over all and that the kings of the earth rule only according to His sovereign permission. As such, Christ alone is worthy of our highest allegiance, and it is to Him that we must render obedience, even if it means, at times, defying the rulers of this world. Jesus’ kingdom alone is eternal, and His rule is above all others.“
“When I survey the wondrous cross On which the Prince of glory died, My richest gain I count but loss, And pour contempt on all my pride.
Now on the first day of the week Mary Magdalene came to the tomb early, while it was still dark, and saw that the stone had been taken away from the tomb. – John 20:1
Mary Magdalene came, announcing to the disciples, “I have seen the Lord”. – John 20:18
On this Sunday, this most glorious day in all of history, death gave way to life. The grave could not hold Jesus. In the early morning, a small group of women who had loved and followed this Jesus, came to the tomb, guarded and sealed, and found it empty. Then ones, twos, small groups, and a crowd of 500 saw him alive. Jesus himself, bearing the wounds of the cross, walking with them, eating with them, teaching them again…as he promised.
He is alive! This man from Nazareth, the Messiah of Israel, the Lord of the world.
With the breath of creation, He speaks of peace, faith, and mission.
With lungs full of air, He breathes on His disciples and grants His Spirit. My Jesus – alive!
The eyes that saw the darkness of death now drink in the sunlight of Easter. My Jesus – alive!* – Trevin Wax
Oh the joy…the indescribable joy of that reality. He died and yet he lives. We were dead in our sins, and because of him, we have life.
Take the time to read this amazing story yourself. The Gospel writers all have given detailed accounts of the risen Christ ( Matthew 28:1-13, Mark 16:1-14, Luke 24:1-49, and John 20:1-29). The Apostle Paul also wrote about Jesus’ resurrection in his letter to the Corinthian church (1 Corinthians 15).
Christ has been raised from the dead, the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep. For as by a man came death, by a man has come also the resurrection of the dead. For as in Adam all die, so also in Christ shall all be made alive…
“Death is swallowed up in victory.” “O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?”
The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. – 1 Cor. 15:20-22, 55-57
Sadly, there are those who think the resurrection of Jesus a myth, or a fairy tale. Even his life is treated casually. Yet, for sure, anyone who does a careful examination of the life and teachings of Jesus would be radically changed. This certainly was my experience. I know too well how wicked my heart can be…my thoughts and actions. God draws us to Himself, and in the drawing we recognize our desperate need for a savior, a strong arm to pull us out of the muck and mire of our own making. Jesus did that for me.
I know Jesus is alive from the historical accounts and the writing of eye witnesses, and because of his own word. I also know he is alive because of how he has transformed lives through the ages. He has changed my life, and he continues to do so.
For the past 20 years, during Lent, I have read Adrian Plass’ book The Unlocking. I would like to close with a portion out of his Easter reading.
On the evening of that day, the first day of the week, the doors being locked where the disciples were for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said to them, “Peace be with you.” – John 20:19
“On that dark Sunday morning, Mary could never have guessed the cosmic significance of the empty tomb. When Jesus rose from the dead the ancient engines of order were fired once more and, in his body on earth, chaos was defeated. And what a wonderful moment for Jesus and his disciples. Neither locks nor fears could withstand the peace and security that the risen Saviour brought, and still brings to his people. It is the peace of knowing that, however rough the road may need to be (and it often is), we shall indeed, in the most real sense, live happily ever after.” – Adrian Plass**
Christ is risen! — He is risen indeed!
[Many of the links below are praise songs of various genres – as this year’s Holy Week closes, I hope you will take some time before the day ends to worship the Lord in the quiet of this great day. Hallelujah!]
See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know Him. Beloved, we are God’s children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when he appears we shall be like Him, because we shall see Him as He is. – 1 John 3:1-2
As indeed he says in Hosea, “Those who were not my people I will call ‘my people,’ and her who was not beloved I will call ‘beloved.’” – Romans 9:25
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 8:37-39
From where do we derive our identity? The parts of us that we consider strengths or even weaknesses? The opinions of others? Our accomplishments or place in society? Our performance at work or play or church? The number of likes we have on a social media platform or reads of our blog?
What if we moved through every one of our days remembering how the Lord of the universe views us?
We are His beloved. Not out of our own worthiness from a human standpoint, but because of who He is. He loved us while we were still deep in sin (Romans 5:8). When we confronted our sin and asked His forgiveness, God not only forgave us but also made us heirs with Christ, adopted into His family forever (Romans 8:17).
Having that immeasurable love from God, how do we get tripped up by comparisons – fretting over how others see us (or even how we see ourselves in comparison to others)?
Pride. Be it self-congratulatory or self-deprecating. It’s still pride. Given how God has said Himself how He loves us, freely and unconditionally, we put such a burden on ourselves with this sin. How do we rid of it (sometimes daily, sometimes moment-by-moment)? By faith. Faith kills pride.
“All self-exaltation [or self-demeaning, I might add] is a re-crucifixion of Christ because he died to kill pride. Every boast, therefore, mocks the suffering of Jesus. And I end on this: every humble attitude, every humble act of faith, glorifies the grace of God in Christ.” – John Piper
Out of our faith in the work of Jesus on the cross for me, we can die to pride. The fruit of that is humility – that work of the Holy Spirit in our lives that allows us to receive and rest in the transcendent love of God.
“C.S. Lewis in Mere Christianity makes a brilliant observation about gospel-humility at the very end of his chapter on pride. If we were to meet a truly humble person, Lewis says, we would never come away from meeting them thinking they were humble...The thing we would remember from meeting a truly gospel-humble person is how much they seemed to be totally interested in us. Because the essence of gospel-humility is not thinking more of myself or thinking less of myself, it is thinking of myself less. Gospel-humility is not needing to think about myself. Not needing to connect things with myself. It is an end to thoughts such as, ‘I’m in this room with these people, does that make me look good? Do I want to be here?’ True gospel-humility means I stop connecting every experience, every conversation, with myself. In fact, I stop thinking about myself. The freedom of self-forgetfulness. The blessed rest that only self-forgetfulness brings.” – Tim Keller
This has been on my heart daily this week in wrestling down thoughts of inadequacy and insignificance. Then God gave me a song on the radio: Belovedness by singer/songwriter Sarah Kroger. Slayed by His love. All over again.
Kroger beautifully writes about this song here. She says:
“Five years ago, I was introduced to a book called Life of the Beloved by Henri Nouwen that changed my life. The book revolves around the idea that every day we’re surrounded by voices. The voices of society, negativity, lies we’ve believed, our peers, etc. What would it look like if we could silence the noise and listen to the voice, that at the center of our being, calls us “beloved”? While reading the book, I realized that instead of owning and living out of my belovedness, I was only owning my mistakes. My journey is far from over, but I work every day to own the truth of who I am.
Our identity isn’t based on our accomplishments or failings, what people think about us, or how we view ourselves in the mirror. Our identity is that we are the beloved children of a relentless Father who loves us unconditionally.
I’m reminded of a stained-glass window in a chapel in which I used to spend a lot of time. The image was of Jesus holding a sheep close to his chest. This is the goal of a Christian. To be so close to the heart of the Shepherd that you hear His heartbeat and can conform your life to that rhythm. When you do this, you’ll go into each day knowing you are loved, not looking for ways to earn it. This is freedom.” – Sarah Kroger
[A stained glass window in Movement Church, Richmond, Virginia]
God’s love for us is utterly without any merit of our own. We receive His love by remembering. Who He is and who we are in Him and alongside our brothers and sisters. Putting self in its proper place. Crucified.
Dave and I are so privileged right now to be in a season of community with a group of young people (20s-30s). I can’t even put into words what it’s like being in the same room with them. They are welcoming to one another as it must have been with Jesus when He sat at tables with publicans and sinners (of whom we once were). Not that these precious ones are perfect, but that isn’t the point, is it? You are just wrapped in the delight of Jesus in this place…in this space of the week with them. There is a winsomeness, a joy in discovering, a deep affection, a celebration of each one who enters the room. God has given us other communities where we’ve had this experience, and I’m grateful for each one. I hope you have such community. If not, seek it out. God doesn’t mean for us to be isolated, left to our own tough thoughts. He means to pour His love on us and He chooses to do some of that through the church.
Worship with me…and believe true what He says about Himself and what He says about you.
You’ve owned your fear and all your self-loathing You’ve owned the voices inside of your head You’ve owned the shame and reproach of your failure It’s time to own your belovedness
You’ve owned your past and how it’s defined you You’ve owned everything everybody else says It’s time to hear what your Father has spoken It’s time to own your belovedness
He says you’re mine, I smiled when I made you I find you beautiful in every way My love for you is fierce and unending I’ll come to find you, whatever it takes My beloved
You’ve owned the mess you see in the mirror You’ve owned the lies that you’re just not enough You’ve been so blinded by all you’re comparing It’s time to own your belovedness
He says you’re mine, I smiled when I made you I find you beautiful in every way My love for you is fierce and unending I’ll come to find you, whatever it takes My beloved
You are completely loved and fully known Beloved, believe He died to make your heart His home
And He says you’re mine, I smiled when I made you I find you beautiful in every way My love for you is fierce and unending I’ll come to find you, whatever it takes He says you’re mine, I smiled when I made you I find you beautiful in every way My love for you is fierce and unending I’ll come to find you, whatever it takes My beloved It’s time to own your belovedness*
My older brother was 10 when he handed off our infant brother into my small arms in the backseat of the car, as Mom drove us away. 4 kids driving away from my biological father. I was five years old.
That father didn’t disappear from our lives just after the divorce. He already had, while still living in the house. Mom was the sole provider, and she hired babysitters for us because, although our father didn’t work, he also didn’t take responsibility for caring for us.
The three smaller of us kids have no memories really of those years. My older brother has since died, but I wish I had asked him about growing up with our dad. He never shared any positive memories in those years following that day of leaving. He actually shared no memories and he, at 10, was old enough to have some.
I have written about the topic of generational sin previously, but I wanted to return to this subject, maybe one last time (maybe not). The reality of sin passing through generations is sobering. When we have experienced harm, or at the very least, a lack of care from a parent or parents, we are at risk of repeating that exact same harm in our own children’s lives. As a parent myself, I want any generational sin to stop right here!
We don’t want to linger in the past, nor do we want to disparage a parent, especially one who has since died. “They did the best they could” is often what we say and hear. I’m not at all about blaming parents for ill treatment of their children, but I do think when we refuse to acknowledge the wrong or harm done to us, then we may find ourselves repeating those same patterns with our own children – patterns we learned too well ourselves growing up.
We can change the course of our lives…and that of our children…and it’s not just through distancing ourselves from parents who harmed us. Otherwise all we teach our children is how to disengage. We don’t give them the skillset to recognize harm and disarm the situation. When we feel the victim, we too often teach our children more what that looks like, rather than how to turn it around for our sake and theirs…and maybe even for our parent(s).
In my family’s childhood home, neglect and abandonment happened even with both parents in the home. Mom was working; she had to work. Given that, she had no choice but to place us in the care of others. Somehow I felt a strong attachment to my Mom following those years (maybe even during those years living with our dad). I’m not sure if my brothers had the same experience, since their dad just wasn’t there for them. Was it harder for them because their same-sex parent wasn’t bonded to them?Photo Credit: Gabor Mate, dr_anniephd, Instagram
We are not left without help these days. Even on social media, we can find solid counsel (even when we can’t afford or feel awkward going to a counselor in person). Check out the full thread of Dr. Nicole LePera’s below (she posts helps every day).
Whether we experienced abuse, neglect, abandonment from our fathers, or our mothers…the impact of their lives continues with us through ours…either steering us along the same course or moving us to take a very different one. We can keep our distance from those sinful patterns as adults without necessarily sacrificing those relationships. That’s a whole other pattern we can guide our children in – that of understanding, humility, and forgiveness.
My father disappeared from our lives. The neglect and abandonment present in our preschool years became permanent. We would never know him…what his own growing up years were like…why he couldn’t seem to love us. We would never know. What spurs me on is the profound love of a great mom and a steadfast God. I know my siblings and I have experienced some sort of imprint from previous generations, but recognizing it is a huge step forward. We then can steer clear of its negative impact on us and our children.
If you experienced harm from a parent, you may not be able to do anything to change that situation, but you can be an instrument of change in your own life…and for the sake of your children.
Also, even with the gift of a deeply loving and bonded parent, like our Mom, don’t be surprised if she/he hasn’t endured trauma from their own childhood home. Be aware of that generational connection.
Understanding the possibility of intergenerational transfer of trauma is not to make victims of a future generation. Understanding allows us to recognize if we have vulnerability and to set in place healthy barriers against the impact of our parents’ trauma.
I actually don’t know what my father’s childhood was like. My mom grew up with an alcoholic father who vented his frustrations about life on his wife and children. Mom stood against his abuse of her own mother and brothers. Her fighter responses were tempered as an adult when she became a believer (follower of Christ). Still that quickness to take offense and wariness of mean-spiritedness were reactions she had to fight all her life. I see that also in myself. – Deb Mills
In The Lord of the Rings, there is a powerful scene of Gandalf standing between those in his care and a monstrous enemy. He called out to this evil creature: “You shall not pass!” When it looked as if he had victory over the beast, he turned his back away from him. This turned out to be disastrous (minute 1:50 into this scene below). There’s a lesson here that just ignoring trauma, even when it feels like we’ve put it behind us, won’t keep it from rearing up again. We are wise to be alert, aware, and prepared for its circling back around.
Boundaries are talked about a lot these days. Forgiveness also… True forgiveness is actually its own boundary. It keeps our hearts tender and our minds free to take a better path in parenting and in relationships, in general. Like in Gandalf’s situation, we would be unwise to prematurely think we have conquered the evil of generational sin. That sin that may have been transferred to us, if not genetically then familially.
Not to despair. Being vigilant is wise in two areas: 1) guarding our hearts against bitterness and hatred toward our parents and 2) caring for and leading our children in the same ways. We have vast resources available to us these days, and we have a God who does not turn away from us as we seek to love as we are loved. No matter what kind of love we received (or receive) from our earthly parents.
“He Himself has said, ‘I will never leave you or forsake you.’ Therefore, we may boldly say: The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?”– Hebrews 13:5b-6
Finally, I want to leave you with this encouragement of steps you can take towards bringing an end to the “sins of the fathers” – at least detoxifying it for the rest of your life and future generations. What would you add to this list? [Share in Comments.]
If you are willing, pray for the person who has harmed you. Not necessarily for them to change but for God to bless them. Weird, right? The winsomeness of this sort of prayer is the impact it has on our own your own care for that person. Our hearts are tendered when we pray.
Tell your story. All of it. To someone you can trust. Someone who will not just sympathize or take up an offense against that person but who truly cares for you and your own healing.
If abuse is part of your story, sort out boundaries without building walls. The walls not only keep that person out; they imprison us within. They also teach our children that walls are the way to go when harm happens…more prisons.
Recognize the sin in “the sins of the fathers”. You may already see a leaning toward it in your own life as an adult. Put safeguards (accountability) in your life to help you choose another path.
Seek understanding (you may need a counselor or that trusted friend above). For health and healing, don’t try to figure this out by yourself.
Remember the one who harmed you may have also been similarly harmed. The sins of his/her own fathers and grandfathers could be imprinted on his life and actions. Not justifying the behavior here but recognizing it might not have started with his relationship with you.
Resist blaming. We want to avoid living as a victim. This is definitely contagious for our children. The person who harmed you did wrong. Calling it sin is a start, then, rather than blaming, forgive. No small thing. When we blame, we carry the brunt of the sin with us into our adult life…with the pain we experienced as a 5 y/o, or 15 y/o. As an adult we can look at that pain with mature eyes. It was wrong, but blaming empowers the sin to continue hurting. We are grown now and don’t have to come under that hurt anymore.
Pursue peace, as much as you yourself can (Romans 12:18; Psalm 34:14; Hebrews 12:14-15. Reconciliation is extremely hard work. We resist it. That work of resisting, trying to ignore that person, carving out our lives away from that person, pretending it doesn’t matter – so much more exhausting and debilitating. Reconciliation requires at least two people, but it can start with one and hopefully the door stays open for future possibilities.
Don’t be deceived thinking you will not fall into the same hurtful pattern you experienced. We can pass that onto our children without even trying…hard warning here. It may look different but it is not gone without our determination to end it with us.
Acknowledge that more people are affected by this sin (for me, neglect and abandonment) than just you and your dad. What is your hope, your goal? If it is just to lessen your own pain (which matters), those who love you will join into the work of that…and its burden. What can you do to lessen that burden on yourself and those around you? [This is a big step forward.]
Increase your capacity for tolerating negative emotions. [See link below.] They do not have to disrupt your joy or destroy your peace. They are indicators for what’s going on under the surface. You don’t have to live in them. They are actually helpful in pointing to next steps.
Do what you can to nurture the relationship. Don’t expect your father (or mother) will have the same skillset nor understanding that you have developed over time. Give grace.
When we give grace, we experience the bountiful good of it ourselves, and our children learn a huge life lesson that benefits them as well.
In the end, we seek to forgive. We can say we forgive but if we keep putting bricks in the walls between us and the one who harmed us, there is no fruit in that “forgiveness”. The fruit is not just for your father/mother, it’s for you and your children. Forgiving doesn’t let that one off the hook; really, it keeps that hurt from dominating our lives (or that of our children’s). Check out resource below on this.
Okay, I’ll close out now. Not a counselor but one who’s lived this and done a lot of work towards my own health and healing and hopefully it shows. Much love. Thanks for staying to the end.
