Category Archives: Conversations

Worship Wednesday – Revisiting “The Jesus Way” – Phil Wickham

Photo Credit: Heartlight

[Adapted from the archives]

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” – John 14:6

“For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9

Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus: Who, existing in the form of God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to death—even death on a cross. Philippians 2:5-8

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23

I will always be grateful for Bernie Cantrell. She loved me enough to tell me the truth.

In my 20s, I had fallen in love with a fellow college student, and we dated into his medical school years. Much of it long-distance and all of it out of God’s will for my life. He was Jewish, I was Christian. I don’t know about his mother, but my mother prayed.

Late in our relationship, I remember vividly a night at my women’s discipleship group, all of us sitting on the floor with our Bibles open, in Bernie Cantrell’s living room. They knew about my relationship with this young man. They knew also that my heart was sincere toward the Lord as well. This is what deception can do…you can be fixed on the way of the Jesus but your eyes can blur from misplaced desires, and, before you know it, you find yourself in a ditch.

I don’t remember if we were in John 14 that night, or if it became a kairos moment when Bernie felt the time was right to talk openly and directly to me about my relationship with this young man. She pointed me to the verse:

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” – John 14:6

That night, as she discipled me (all of us) on Jesus being the Way and only in walking in His way will we find Home, the Holy Spirit grabbed my heart anew. Shortly after that, both this boy and I mutually severed our relationship. Done deal. Full stop. No looking back.

He would marry a Jewish woman, and God brought Dave my way.

Now there have been other times in life, when I was tempted to choose my way instead of God’s way for me. Seasons when life was hard and I even questioned my salvation (that particular season was the one of parenting small children – physically exhausting and emotionally overwhelming at times). There were hard seasons when entitlement raised its ugly head and when offenses made me blind with hurt and anger. God’s Word seemed too far out of reach…or beyond my sense of fairness. Misplaced desires tempted me to believe lies over truth.

These days (in our country and occasionally seeping into our church life), we are bombarded by the push and pull of political ideology, cultural swagger, family estrangement, and the sense that God is far away.

Truth: God is NOT far away. We have been drawn off course, but He is as near as a Shepherd’s voice. He is just ahead. His way can be ours again.

I am so thankful for the truth of Scripture. So thankful for friends and family who point me back to Christ when I get distracted or discouraged. So thankful for opportunities when the Lord allows for me to point sweet ones to the way of Jesus.

God tells us that His way is different (higher) than the one we, in our sinful bent, would naturally take. However, when we surrender our lives to Jesus as Lord and Savior, we don’t have to be bound to another way anymore. Through the power of the Holy Spirit, we can walk in His way. We bear the fruits of the Spirit in this world…on this path. What an amazing life we have, reflecting the humility, mercy, and love that Jesus displayed. How much it profits those around us! How much it pleases God the Father!

The King will answer them, “Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers or sisters, you did it to me.”Matthew 25:40

Sometimes it’s me who benefits the most – as “one of the least of these”…staying on the way of Jesus. No more being twisted in the wind of Satan’s lies about me and about others.

Earlier this year, Pastor Cliff preached on loving our enemies from Matthew 5:43-48. So good! In the worship play list for that morning, our worship leader Ryan included the Phil Wickham song The Jesus Way.

Jesus’ way is not the way of this world. It is so beautiful and so worth our lives to point in this direction. To walk in His way daily “tapping into a reservoir that is not of this world but for this world” (from Cliff’s message). For our sakes, our neighbors, our children and grandchildren, and our enemies.

Photo Credit: Heartlight

Worship with me.

[Verse 1]
If you curse me, then I will bless you
If you hurt me, I will forgive
And if you hate me, then I will love you
I choose the Jesus way
Oh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

[Verse 2]
If you’re helpless, I will defend you (Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
If you’re burdened, I’ll share the weight (Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
And if you’re hopeless, then let me show you (Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
There’s hope in the Jesus way

[Chorus]
I follow Jesus, I follow Jesus
He wore my sin, I’ll gladly wear His name
He is the treasure, He is the answer
Oh, I choose the Jesus way

[Verse 3]
If you strike me, I will embrace you
And if you chain me, I’ll sing His praise
And if you kill me, my home is Heaven
For I choose the Jesus way

[Chorus]
I follow Jesus, I follow Jesus
He wore my sin, I’ll gladly wear His name
He is the treasure, He is the answer
Oh, I choose the Jesus way

[Bridge]
And I choose surrender, I choose to love
Oh God, my Savior, You’ll always be enough
I choose forgiveness, I choose grace
I choose to worship, no matter what I face
I choose the Jesus way, I choose the Jesus way
I choose the Jesus way, I choose the Jesus way

[Chorus]
I follow Jesus, I follow Jesus
He wore my sin, I’ll gladly wear His name
He is the treasure, He is the answer
Oh, I choose the Jesus way
I follow Jesus, I follow Jesus
He wore my sin, I’ll gladly wear His name
He is the treasure, He is the answer
Oh, I choose the Jesus way
Oh, I choose the Jesus way

[Outro]
Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh*

“Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” Ephesians 3:20-21

The Jesus Way – Lyrics – Songwriters: Phil Wickham & Jonathan Smith

Faith Behind the Song: “The Jesus Way” – Phil Wickham – by Scott Savage

Just yesterday, an iconic singer/songwriter/philanthropist, Dolly Parton, went to be with the Lord. It made me so sad…not for her now in the presence of her Savior, but for this world a poorer place with her gone.

Photo Credit: Facebook , Thy Flame of Love

If you study her life, you get past all the glitz and even the inspired songwriting, and what you find is a deep and abiding faith in Jesus – across her life, more than not, she chose the Jesus Way.

Practicing the Way – Course & Free Resources on Spiritual Formation

Worship Wednesday – For Christ-Followers – It’s Surrender – Not Self-Improvement – Deb Mills

Worship Wednesday – First Things First – With Consumed by Fire – Deb Mills

https://www.youtube.com/embed/bpTOcZN9JB4?feature=oembed Bernie CantrellCliff JordanHayden DaumJonathan SmithLove Your EnemiesMovement ChurchPhil WickhamThe Way of JesusWorshipWorship Wednesday

One last song by Dolly – sung at our Chad‘s funeral – “I Will Always Love You”

Monday Morning Moment – Rewiring Our Brain – from Lies to Truth

Photo Credit: David N. Johnson

What we think and then speak about ourselves (and others) can, with repetition, become hard-wired in our brains. This function, of which you may be familiar, is neuroplasticity. It’s super helpful with new work tasks, habit formation, and learning to play an instrument, for instance. The tricky thing about neuroplasticity is that it also is engaged when we repeat things that aren’t necessarily true about how we see ourselves or the world around us.

I follow Erika, a Christian neuroscience coach, on Instagram and Facebook. She recently posted a clear and practical guide to how we can consciously rewire our brain, especially when we’ve allowed negative (essentially untruthful) thoughts and comments take us to a dark place.

She should write a blog or Substack, but I haven’t found one yet. So below please find her well-studied take on “mind over matter (brain)”.

Erika writes: “Neuroscience shows us that: thought + emotion + repetition strengthens a neural pathway.”

She writes for Christians, but honestly, her 8 practices for rewiring our brains are noteworthy for anyone desiring to clear their thinking:

  1. Notice the thought. Think about what you’re thinking about. At times we say things that if checked and sorted we know aren’t true; they are just how we feel at the moment. Not facts but feelings.
  2. Identify the lie. Because of repetition, you may have thoughts that have taken up residence in your brain for so long (neuroplasticity), they seem true. You may need help, through prayer or with a trusted friend, to assess whether you have held onto a lie – about yourself or others.
  3. Take the thought captive. One of my favorite Bible verses is 2 Corinthians 10:5“We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.” Even if a thought or opinion has long been lodged in our minds, we don’t have to preserve it. With help from God or a friend, we can acknowledge a thought that is simply not true and begin the work of isolating it and ridding it from our minds. Rewiring our brain and altering a neural pathway.
  4. Replace the lie with God’s truth. What an amazing guide for life is the Word of God! Wisdom for all of us. If you aren’t a believer, sort out what is really true vs. what has taken up squatter’s rights in your brain – hurting you rather than healing you. For Christians, we look for what is true in the Bible and replace the lie with the truth. It will require its own repetition to rewire our thinking. So worth it. “Is not my word like fire, declares the LORD, and like a hammer that breaks the rock in pieces?”Jeremiah 23:29
  5. Preach the truth to yourself. When a lie sets up residence in our brains, we have to use repetition to unseat it. Speaking what is true over the lie will put neuroplasticity in a higher gear. I love what Erika says here: “Your mouth reinforces what your mind believes”.
  6. Keep renewing your mind. The old cortisol-filled thoughts aren’t going to go away easily. When they rise up, remember to speak/think what is actually true. The negative thoughts will fade. The Bible talks about “renewing the mind” (Romans 12:2) It is an ongoing practice.
  7. Stay consistent when nothing seems to change. Again, those negative thoughts, those lies, may have embedded over years. The neural pathways are strong. Don’t be discouraged that change takes time. “Don’t mistake slow progress for no progress.” I’m a visual learner. Sometimes for me, it takes written cues on my keyboard, in my journal, on my kitchen counter, in my car. [OK, I can be a slow learner, too.] So thankful for truth that sets my captive brain free!
  8. Build a Godly fortress in your mind. If you have dark days or you struggle with thoughts that overwhelm you, if you can’t resist speaking out contempt for yourself or others, you need to build fortification against such thoughts which turn into words. When we allow our brains to be wired with negative, hateful thoughts, we can rid ourselves of those thoughts. However, we also have to replace them with what is true (Matthew 12:43-45). Building a fortress takes work, but, over time, it is that amazing rewiring of our neural pathways and setting in motion a very different neuroplasticity. So worth the work!

Erika at Nourished and Rooted on Instagram

Photo Credit: QuoteFancy, Laozi

You Become Your Thoughts – Erika – Nourished and Rooted – Instagram

You Become Your Thoughts – Erika – Nourished & Rooted – Facebook

Dr. Lee Warren Podcast – excellent resource – on all things mind/brain – Christian neurosurgeon – brilliant and and easy to engage

The Life-changing Art of Self-Brain Surgery – Dr. W. Lee Warren, MD

Brainwork: The Power of Neuroplasticity

Neuroplasticity and Cognitive Restructuring – Sydney Ceruto Ph.D.

Worship Wednesday – “How Was Your Week?” – Asking Better Questions

Photo Credit: Red Letter Challenge

We are in a culture that has lost much of its curiosity. Asking questions seems intrusive and not honoring what might be considered private. What a shame, really! It moves us to give the appearance we don’t really want to know the person in front of us. Settling for the few word answer to questions like “How’s your week been?”

Photo Credit: Pinterest

When we do ask questions, we can move past small talk by being curious, even with strangers. Asking questions (beyond “How’s your week been?”) opens the door to the person in front of us to experience being seen…and valued. Just yesterday, I was with a friend younger than me by a lot, a mom of a toddler and newborn. This amazing young woman seems to have the gift of asking great questions. It always recharges my own curiosity because of her genuine interest in people – which clearly included me yesterday morning. I felt seen and better known. And valued.

Pastor Cliff’s sermon this week focused on asking better questions. He drew on John 4 – Jesus speaking to the woman at the well. Depending on the translation, he didn’t ask many questions in this conversation, but he did draw her out and invited reflection. He lingered in conversation with a woman who had known the terrible judgment of others, but she experienced welcome from him. At the end of their talk that day, she ran back to the village, a women who felt known and not judged, influencing many others to experience what she had.

The woman left her water jar, went back into the town, and said to the people, “Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Christ?” So they left the town and made their way toward Jesus.

[This clip from The Chosen, Season 1, Episode 8 is a depiction of the conversation Jesus had with the Samaritan woman – not all from Scripture but reflective of His character and His impact on her life.]

12 Critical Questions Jesus Asked – Lisa Loraine Baker

Top 10 Questions from Jesus in the Bible – I. Gordon

Jesus and the Samaritan Woman: A Transformative Encounter at the Well

The 305 Questions Jesus Asked with One Shocking Discovery – Zach Zehnder

The Art of Asking Better Questions – Pursuing Stronger Relationships, Healthier leadership, and Deeper Faith – J. R. Briggs – an excerpt

Chuck Olson compiled the following quotes from Briggs’ book. We are called to care for those on the fringes. To help them know they are seen and known and loved by God, through us as His people:

“We live in a world that has conditioned us toward answers. We’ve been taught to give the right answers, yet little attention has been given to teaching us how to ask the right questions. We don’t have a shortage of information; we have a shortage of wisdom, curiosity, and wonder. Asking good questions is a lost art.”

In our world, which elevates accomplishing tasks over deepening relationships, it makes sense that questions aren’t held in high esteem. We value pragmatism, individualism, and efficiency. Certainly, there are times we need to tell to be helpful. But if we’re honest with ourselves, sometimes we just want to win an argument or gain control of a situation, conversation, or person. Other times we want to portray our intelligence. Telling is often much more efficient, and our brains like certainty.

“[Asking questions] is perceived as inefficient and unhelpful. Questions are often seen as unproductive. In our fast-paced, efficient, productivity-oriented world, it feels as though someone has slammed on the brakes of progress when they ask a question. We favor task accomplishment over relational depth. Leaders often feel the need to act decisively and quickly and can become anxious about the perceived inefficiencies that questions might bring.”

“What, then, is required of us if we want to ask great questions? There are four core essentials: curiosity, wisdom, humility, and courage.”

“I’m convinced: there has never been a time in modern history when genuine, thoughtful, caring questions are needed more. In a world saturated not only by ever-increasing loneliness but also by division, polarization, and fragmentation, genuine question-asking can provide healing and connection like almost nothing else.”

“French social activist Simone Weil wrote, “Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.””

“Trust is built on thick bonds of relationship, and great questions build trust. I live by the strong conviction that leaders should be the most curious people on the planet. If we want information, we can Google it. But if what we’re after is clarity and connection, we need questions. Our world isn’t in need of more leaders who are smarter, more eloquent, and more efficient; instead, we need more leaders who are wiser, humbler, and more curious…The late leadership and organizational expert Peter Drucker said, “The leader of the past may have been the person who knew how to tell, but certainly the leader of the future will be the person who knows how to ask.””

“Dallas Willard was fond of saying that one of the most revelatory questions regarding the state of our souls is to ask, What’s bothering me? When I’m agitated or angsty or impatient or irritable or downright angry, which happens much more often than I’d like to admit, I’ve learned to take a step back and ask, What’s going on here? Why am I bothered right now? What do I need to pay attention to currently?”

If you want to ask better questions, you have to begin with genuine interest in others. Curiosity is fundamentally at the center of questions. If we don’t possess genuine curiosity, these practices won’t matter all that much in the long run. But even a genuine interest in others is still not enough. We need specific and intentional practices rooted in our everyday lives. Call them what you want—practices, habits, exercises, spiritual disciplines, action steps—but we grow when we live out specific actions in an embodied form, because training takes us further than just trying.”

________________________________________________________________________________

As you pause with me on Worship Wednesday, we can praise the Lord who knows everything there is to know about us and loves us still. We can also learn from Him that asking questions leads to our knowing others better and their reflecting on answers maybe unknown to themselves, until asked. Asked by another who shows genuine interest and care…like Jesus.

Photo Credit: Justin Buzzard, QuoteFancy

100 Questions Jesus Asked – Josh Hunt

Can You Hear Me Now? – Dallas & Nancy Demmitt

25 Questions Jesus Asked (That Most Christians Never Do) – Mark Goering

30 Questions That Build Stronger Bonds Than ‘How Are You?’ – Wendy Rose Gould

This clip just for fun:

Monday Morning Moment – The Addictive Nature of Complaining and Breaking the Cycle

Photo Credit: The Joy Within, Kyle Greenfield

Could I be complaining about complaining? Not at all. Having already written about it twice before (and not counting my pieces on negative thinking), why revisit it?

Here’s why.

Complaining is bad for us. It actually rewires the brain into thinking our complaints are current reality. Whatever has riled us up in the recent (or not so recent) past stirs up cortisol excretion (a stress hormone). Then as we process our complaint with a sympathetic listener, we actually then get a hit of dopamine. This positive effect of complaining is the pathway to habit. In fact, the brain will default to complaining in the future, rather than positive problem-solving or exercising gratitude for the good over the bad.

If, however, our processing a complicated or stressful situation helps us to get to a positive solution, the brain responds accordingly. This should be much more satisfying than habitual complaining which is personally depressing as well as depressing to others. There are rewards in complaining if it engenders sympathy maybe or gets us out of responsibilities, but those “rewards” turn into negatives when complaining becomes habitual and drives people away. This is not to say complaining should be silenced. We need to process hard things. The problem with complaining is when it becomes the end-goal.

The Psychological Harm of Complaining – Bence Nanay Ph.D.

It is quite sobering actually to consider all that’s written these days (see below) about the neurological changes that can come from repetitive behaviors, such as complaining. Fortunately, reversing this is possible.

High Focus Centers are treatment programs across multiple US states. Their focus is out-patient care for substance abuse and psychiatric disorders/issues. The following is a substantive excerpt from their article on the addictive nature of complaining, its physiological and relational harm, and the benefit of shifting complaining to a healthier mindset in 5 steps. 5 steps! Worth the read and your consideration, if you struggle with complaining or love someone who does.

“The purpose of the complaint often isn’t to fix anything…It’s about drawing attention—maybe to feel seen, validated or pitied. Over time, this loop of discomfort → complaint → attention can become addictive, providing a false sense of control, significance or identity…Victim mentality is a pattern of thinking where a person sees themselves as perpetually wronged by others or by life itself. They may believe they are ‘good’ or ‘right,’ and that any problem in their life is caused by other people who are ‘bad’ or ‘wrong.’..At its core, victim mentality keeps someone trapped in blame. It externalizes every challenge and prevents personal growth, because it shifts responsibility away from the self.”

“Just like substance use or compulsive behaviors, complaining can offer short-term relief. It may feel good to vent, to be validated or to be the center of concern. But over time, this habitual negativity can actually rewire the brain, reinforcing pessimism, resentment and passivity.

Photo Credit: ThinkLink

Here’s why complaining can feel addictive:

  • Dopamine hits: When someone receives sympathy or attention after complaining, it can activate the brain’s reward system.
  • Identity reinforcement: Constantly viewing oneself as the victim can create a strong sense of self—though unhealthy, it’s familiar and consistent.
  • Avoidance of responsibility: Complaining and blaming protect someone from having to make changes, take risks or face uncomfortable truths.
  • Social bonding: In some circles, shared complaining becomes a social glue—even though it reinforces negativity.

Unfortunately, these perceived ‘benefits’ come at a high cost: chronic stress, broken relationships, low self-esteem and an inability to build lasting inner peace.”

Is Complaining an Addiction? Understanding the Trap of Victim Mentality – High Focus Treatment Centers

Shifting from Complaining to Empowerment

“Escaping the cycle of complaining and victimhood begins with awareness. If you find yourself constantly focused on what’s wrong—without seeking solutions—it may be time to ask: What am I hoping to gain from this?

Here are some strategies to begin shifting your mindset:

  1. Notice the Pattern

Start by tracking your complaints. What triggers them? Are you seeking connection, pity or a sense of righteousness?

  1. Ask: “Can I fix this?”

If the answer is yes, take action. If the answer is no, explore acceptance. Complaining about things you can’t or won’t change is a drain on your energy.

  1. Reframe, Don’t Deny

You don’t have to pretend everything is fine. But try reframing: instead of “I hate this heat,” say, “This heat is uncomfortable—maybe I’ll get a fan or find some shade.”

  1. Practice Gratitude

Gratitude is the antidote to victimhood. Regularly recognizing what’s going well helps train your brain to seek out the positive.

  1. Get Support

If complaining and blame feel like your default mode, it may be time to explore why. Often, these patterns are rooted in trauma, insecurity or learned helplessness. Working with a therapist can help uncover those roots and replace them with healthier coping tools.

Is Complaining an Addiction? Understanding the Trap of Victim Mentality – High Focus Treatment Centers

Bottom line: Complaining is bad for you and can become habitual. It can become relational second-hand smoke, harming you and those around you. Ironically, this habit can be transformed, like any other, with great positive impact on your brain. Let’s get after it!

Monday Morning Moment – Don’t Let Complaining Rewire Your Brain – Deb Mills

Monday Morning Moment – Complaining Rewires Your Brain – How to Curb (Maybe Not Stop) Complaining – Deb Mills

How Complaining Rewires Your Brain Toward Negativity – ThinkLink – Super quick read and super helpful as well!

How Complaining Rewires Your Brain – Brain Performance

Chronic Complaining: Examining Its Relationship to Mental Health

The Truth About Complaining – Kyle Greenfield

Is Complaining Good for You? Therapists Explain [The Answer Is Surprising] – Brina Patel

Complaining and Your Brain: 4 Surprising Effects

Why Complaining is Addictive – Dr. Gloria Lee

How Negative Thinking Destroys Your Relationship – Dr. Gloria Lee

Is Complaining an Addiction? Find Out! Take the One-Day “Abstain from Complain” Challenge – Dr. Michael Ceely

Why Do I Complain So Much? Understanding the Psychology of Negativity

The Pros and Cons of Complaining – Barbara Frazier

Photo Credit: QuoteFancy

Worship Wednesday – National Day of Prayer – “If My People”

Photo Credit: The Grace Blog, Jason White

“If My people who are called by My name humble themselves, and pray and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.”2 Chronicles 7:14

On May 7, U. S. churches and Christian organizations (even some in our government and among other religions) will set aside time to observe the National Day of Prayer. We are called to put our political and ethnic differences aside and to seek God’s healing of our country.

National Day of Prayer – Prayer Guide (pdf) – The Shepherd’s Church

The verse above from 2 Chronicles is often quoted. It’s a beautiful promise, conditioned on the response of the people of Israel in ancient times. Does it apply today to believers in America?

Below find commentary by two theologians answering this question. Their answers surprised me a bit, the fact being I am NOT a theologian. However, as you read their answers, remember that God speaks to all of us through all of His Word. As He led His people then, He leads His people now. He calls us to humble ourselves, to pray, to seek Him, and to repent from our evil doing. We can’t rest on our political leanings; we can’t trust in human guardians of our nation’s well-being (over the Sovereign keeping of God Himself); we can’t carry hatred or pride in our hearts without thought of the consequences. We who follow Christ aim to submit to His ways and His word on all things…with His help.

“In context, 2 Chronicles 7:14 is a promise to ancient Israel (and perhaps even modern-day Israel) that, if they will repent and return to the Lord, He will rescue them. However, many Christians in the United States have taken this verse as a rallying cry for America. (Perhaps Christians in other countries have done so as well.) In this interpretation, Christians are the people who are called by God’s name. If Christians will humble themselves, pray, seek God’s face, and repent, then God will heal their land—often a moral and political healing is in view as well as economic healing. The question is whether or not this is a proper interpretation/application.

The United States does not have the same covenant relationship with God that ancient Israel enjoyed. The covenant with Israel was unique and exclusive. The terms that applied to Israel simply did not apply to any other nation, and it is improper for these terms to be co-opted and applied to a different nation. When 2 Chronicles 7:14 is applied to Christians in the U.S. or any other modern nation, it is usually with the understanding that the Christians in that nation—the true believers in Jesus Christ who have been born again by the Spirit of God—will comprise the righteous remnant. God never promised that if a righteous remnant repents and prays for their nation, that the nation will be saved. Perhaps if national repentance occurred, then God would spare a modern nation as He spared Nineveh at the preaching of Jonah (see Jonah 3)—but that is a different issue.

Having said that, it is never wrong to confess our sins and pray—in fact, it is our duty as believers to continuously confess and forsake our sins so that they will not hinder us (Hebrews 12:1) and to pray for our nation and those in authority (1 Timothy 2:1–2). It may be that God in His grace will bless our nation as a result—but there is no guarantee of national deliverance. Even if God did use our efforts to bring about national repentance and revival, there is no guarantee that the nation would be politically or economically saved. As believers, we are guaranteed personal salvation in Christ (Romans 8:1), and we are also guaranteed that God will use us to accomplish His purposes, whatever they may be. It is our duty as believers to live holy lives, seek God, pray, and share the gospel knowing that all who believe will be saved, but the Bible does not guarantee the political, cultural, or economic salvation of our nation.” – Got Questions

Worship with me. We have God’s Word and His wisdom leading us into repentance, for our good and His glory. If God chooses, He may heal our land, but most importantly, for us, is our joyful and hopeful submission to His rule and reign in our lives. Still…this beautiful Imperials rendition of 2 Chronicles 7:14 is a call to prayer and repentance for us Christ followers, no matter the outcome. [I’ve loved this song for many years and still get goosebumps, singing along with the Imperials. Enjoy.]

If My people
Which are called by My name
Shall humble themselves
Shall humble themselves and pray
If My people
Which are called by My name
Shall seek My face
And turn from their wicked ways

Then will I hear from heaven
Then will I hear from heaven
Then will I hear and will forgive
Forgive their sin

If My people
Which are called by My name
Shall humble themselves
Shall humble themselves and pray
I will forgive their sin
I will forgive their sin
I will forgive their sin
And heal their land

If My people
Which are called by My name
Shall humble themselves
Shall humble themselves
Shall humble themselves and pray*

“If there was ever anyone who had humbled themselves, prayed, sought the Lord, and turned from their wicked ways, it was the disciples and the early church.  But did they receive healing for their land? No, they received persecution.  They were threatened, and some were even thrown in jail for their faith.  Eventually most were even scattered from their land (Acts 8:1-3).

But despite all these terrible situations and circumstances in their lives, they were blessed with every spiritual blessing (Ephesians 1:3).  They had the peace and abundant life of Christ. And this is the promise for all who believe.  We don’t have to find economic and political healing in our land to enjoy God’s blessings.  Our blessings are found in a Person.

Does that mean we shouldn’t pray for our country and hope things get better?

Absolutely not!  We can love our country and be thankful we get to live here.  We can be grateful for the men and women who sacrificed their lives to protect our freedom.  We can pray for our country and hope things get better. But as we pray for our country, our ultimate hope is not that our lives get more comfortable through prosperity but that more people come to know Jesus and the abundant life that can only be found in Him.” – Jason White

*Lyrics to “If My People” – Songwriter: Jimmy Owens, as sung by The Imperials

What Is the Meaning of 2 Chronicles 7:14? – Got Questions

Jesus and Holy Week – Day 5 – Maundy Thursday – Passover Celebration & His Last Supper Before the Cross

http://debmillswriter.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/Blog-Holy-Week-Last-Supper.jpg
Photo Credit – Baptist Press – Courtesy of DeMoss News Pond

[Adapted from the Archives]

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” – John 13:34-35

The Thursday before Jesus’ trial and crucifixion was the awaited celebration of Passover. In this day, we have a picture of Jesus, in all his humanity, and in all his deity. All four of the Gospels written about Jesus’ life have an account of this day’s events (Matthew 26:17-75; Mark 14; Luke 22:7-65; John 13:1-18:27).

After sunset, the Jewish people would take the Passover meal together – as families usually. They would share the Seder meal and remember how God protected them during the days of their slavery in Egypt.

Photo Credit: Seder Meal, Robert Couse-Baker, Flickr

This particular Thursday is known as Maundy Thursday. Maundy means “commanded” and also can refer to the ceremonial washing of feet.  Jesus took upon himself to wash the dusty feet of his disciples, modeling for them his command to love one another (John 13:34-35).

After Jesus and his disciples finished their meal together, he would then enter the garden Gethsemane to pray. As He prayed, He wrestled with his heavenly Father over the need for him to die. “O my Father, if it is possible, let this cup [of suffering and death] pass from me.” Then, settled in his obedience, he reiterated: “O my Father, if this cup cannot pass away from me unless I drink it, Your will be done.” [Matthew 26:39; Matthew 26:42]

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/80/Giorgio_Vasari_-_The_Garden_of_Gethsemane_-_Google_Art_Project.jpgPhoto Credit: Wikimedia

Sometime during that dark night of the soul, he turned his attention toward his disciples and all the rest of us, across the ages, who would follow him. His prayer to the Father, recorded in John 17, is exquisitely beautiful, especially in the context of this difficult night. [Take time to read it in full, but I’ve included a part of it below.]

“Holy Father, keep them in Your name, the name which You have given Me, that they may be one even as We are. I have given them Your word; and the world has hated them, because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. I do not ask You to take them out of the world, but to keep them from the evil one. Sanctify them in the truth; Your word is truth. As You sent Me into the world, I also have sent them into the world. I do not ask on behalf of these alone, but for those also who believe in Me through their word; that they may all be one; even as You, Father, are in Me and I in You, that they also may be in Us, so that the world may believe that You sent Me.”

Then out of the darkness, Jesus’ disciple Judas Iscariot came to betray him. He was leading a group of the religious leaders, along with a huge company of soldiers. Although Jesus’ loyal disciples wanted to resist his arrest, Jesus refused their intervening and surrendered himself…not to the mob but to the will of the Father.

The betrayal was complete. His disciples fled (although those closest to him would soon seek out where he was being held). Jesus would spend the rest of the night in the tormenting custody of his enemies. The countdown to the cross had begun in earnest. A countdown that actually began at the Fall of humanity, and, under the careful watch of God, our Father…a countdown toward restoring us back to Himself.

One more day…

Jesus Prays for His Disciples…and For Us – Ralph F. Wilson

Photo Credit: Speak Life UK

Jesus and Holy Week – Day 3 – Tuesday – Long Day Teaching & Countering Religious Opposition

Photo Credit – slidesharecdn.com

Adapted from the Archives]

When He [Jesus] entered the temple, the chief priests and the elders of the people came to Him while He was teaching, and said, “By what authority are You doing these things, and who gave You this authority?”Matthew 21:23

On this long day, Jesus would demonstrate in one situation after another that he spoke and acted with the authority of God Himself. The barren fig tree cursed by Jesus the day before had indeed withered and died. The disciples saw it themselves that morning as they walked again from Bethany to Jerusalem. Jesus spoke to them of faith, which they would need all the more in the days ahead (Matthew 21:21-22).

Again and again…in Jerusalem, in the Temple, and on the busy streets during Passover, Jesus was confronted by the religious leaders.

It’s amazing that he even gained entry to the Temple after overturning the market there just the day before. Again, another sign of his authority. He was untouchable, until he gave himself over to his own death on the cross…for us.

The religious leaders were determined to trap him in some sort of blasphemous teaching or interpretation of the law. It would not happen, yet they were set on his destruction one way or another.

In an attempt to test Jesus’ understanding of the law, a legal advisor to the Pharisees asked Jesus what was the greatest commandment in the law. The Pharisees cautioned strict adherence to the laws of the Torah, all 613 of them! They were not prepared for Jesus’ response:

Jesus answered, “The foremost is, ‘Hear, O Israel! The Lord our God is One Lord; and you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ The second is this, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” –   Mark 12:29-31

Two commands: 1) Love God with your whole being; 2) Love your neighbor as yourself. Some might say that a third is presumed in that you must love yourself in a right and wholesome way in order to truly love others.

Jesus’ love for the Father and his love for all people were in perfect unity. Loving God, with all we are, gives us perspective and capacity to love those around us, whomever they are, as we have experienced love ourselves, from the God who loves us perfectly and completely.

The Pharisees, Sadducees, and other Jewish leaders grew more angry at Jesus and were vexed as to how to destroy his popularity and influence with the masses of Jews loyal to him. All their trickery failed this time. Jesus was not intimidated by them, and, in fact, spoke some of his strongest words against them while teaching that day.

His 8 “woe to you” pronouncements against the Pharisees are listed at the bottom of this page. When I read them, the song from the original Godspell film comes to mind as the Jesus character stands against the religious “machine” of his day – those “hypocrites”, those “blind guides” of the people.

http://debmillswriter.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/Blog-Holy-Week-Pharisees.jpgPhoto Credit: www.faithbibleministries.com

Finally, leaving Jerusalem that day, Jesus stopped on the Mount of Olives (Olivet) to speak about the future. He talked at length, to his disciples and all those who followed, about the end times. He warned them about false teachers and the evil that would rise up in those last days. What it must have been to listen to Jesus, the Messiah, on that Tuesday – filled with a mixture of faith in him and fear of what could lie ahead for them, and the generations to come.

When Jesus and his disciples returned for the evening to Bethany, Judas Iscariot, one of the twelve, stole away and met with Jesus’ enemies. [Matthew 26:14-16] In the dark of night, he would betray Jesus to them. He acted as a coward, away from the crowds who would have strongly objected…

For 30 pieces of silver, Judas would seemingly take history into his own hands, but the clock was already ticking, and Jesus would finish what he came to earth to do.

Postscript:

8 “Woe’s” Spoken by Jesus Against the Pharisees (Matthew 23:13-30)

1- Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for you shut up the kingdom of Heaven against men.

2- Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for you devour widows’ houses, and pray at length as a pretense.

3– Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for you travel land and sea to win one proselyte, and when he is won, you make him twice as much a son of hell as yourselves.

4- Woe to you, blind guides, who say, “Whoever swears by the temple, it is nothing; but whoever swears by the gold of the temple, he is obliged to perform it.”

5- Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for you pay tithe of mint and anise and cumin, and have neglected the weightier matters of the law: justice and mercy and faith.

6- Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for you cleanse the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of extortion and self-indulgence.

7- Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for you are like whitewashed tombs which indeed appear beautiful outwardly, but inside are full of dead men’s bones and all uncleanness.

8- Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! Because you build the tombs of the prophets and adorn the monuments of the righteous, and say, “If we had lived in the days of our fathers, we would not have been partakers with them in the blood of the prophets.”*

The Final Days of Jesus – Andreas J. Kostenberger & Justin Taylor

YouTube video Alas for You from the original film Godspell

Spotify Playlist – From Palm Sunday to the Resurrection – Beth Wayland

The Way of Jesus #2: Unsettling the Religious Status Quo – James Nored & Phil Ware

Reasoning Why Jesus Cursed the Fig Tree – Sam Shamoun

Jesus and the Pharisees

*8 Woes Upon the Pharisees – Curtis Kittrell

Great Texts of the Bible – The Two Commandments – commentary by James Hastings

Worship Wednesday – The Jesus Way – Phil Wickham

Photo Credit: Heartlight

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” – John 14:6

“For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9

Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus: Who, existing in the form of God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to death—even death on a cross. Philippians 2:5-8

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23

I will always be grateful for Bernie Cantrell. She loved me enough to tell me the truth.

In my 20s, I had fallen in love with a fellow college student, and we dated into his medical school years. Much of it long-distance and all of it out of God’s will for my life. I had allowed myself to be deceived that him being Jewish and me being Christian melded together two of God’s chosen people. Great spiritualizing, right? His mother wouldn’t think so nor did mine. Not sure about his mom, but mine prayed.

Late in our relationship, I remember vividly a night at my women’s discipleship group, all of us sitting on the floor with our Bibles open, in Bernie Cantrell’s living room. They knew about my relationship with this young man. They knew also that my heart was sincere toward the Lord as well. This is what deception can do…you can be fixed on the way of the Jesus but your eyes can blur from misplaced desires, and, before you know it, you find yourself in a ditch.

I don’t remember if we were in John 14 that night, or if it became a kairos moment when Bernie felt the time was right to talk openly and directly to me about my relationship with this young man. She pointed me to the verse:

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” – John 14:6

That night, as she discipled me (all of us) on Jesus being the Way and only in walking in His way will we find Home, the Holy Spirit grabbed my heart. Shortly after that, both this boy and I mutually severed our relationship. Done deal. Full stop. No looking back.

Now there have been other times in life, when I was tempted to choose my way instead of God’s way for me. Seasons when life was hard and I even questioned my salvation (that season was the one of parenting small children – physically exhausting and emotionally overwhelming at times). There were hard seasons when entitlement raised his ugly head and when offenses made me blind with hurt and anger that God’s Word seemed too far out of reach…or beyond my sense of fairness. Misplaced desires.

These days (in our country and occasionally seeping into our church life), we are bombarded by the push and pull of political ideology, cultural swagger, family estrangement, and the sense that God is far away.

Truth: God is NOT far away. We have been drawn off course, but He is as near as a Shepherd’s voice. He is just ahead. His way can be ours again.

I am so thankful for the truth of Scripture. So thankful for friends and family who point me back to Christ when I get distracted or discouraged. So thankful for opportunities when the Lord allows for me to point sweet ones to the way of Jesus.

God tells us that His way is different (higher) than the one we, in our sinful bent, would naturally take. However, when we surrender our lives to Jesus as Lord and Savior, we don’t have to be bound to another way anymore. Through the power of the Holy Spirit, we can walk in His way. We bear the fruits of the Spirit in this world…on this path. What an amazing life we have, reflecting the humility, mercy, and love that Jesus displayed. How much it profits those around us! How much it pleases God the Father! Sometimes it’s me as “the least of these”…staying on the way of Jesus benefits me the most. No more twisted in the wind of Satan’s lies about me and about others.

The King will answer them, “Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers or sisters, you did it to me.”Matthew 25:40

This past Sunday, on an icy day from his office, Pastor Cliff preached on loving our enemies from Matthew 5:43-48. So good! In the worship play list for that morning, our worship leader Ryan included the Phil Wickham song The Jesus Way.

This song has replayed in my mind all week. Jesus’ way is not the way of this world. It is so beautiful and so worth our lives to point in this direction. To walk in His way daily “tapping into a reservoir that is not of this world but for this world” (from Cliff’s message). For our sakes, our neighbors, our children and grandchildren, and our enemies.

Photo Credit: Heartlight

Worship with me.

[Verse 1]
If you curse me, then I will bless you
If you hurt me, I will forgive
And if you hate me, then I will love you
I choose the Jesus way
Oh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

[Verse 2]
If you’re helpless, I will defend you (Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
If you’re burdened, I’ll share the weight (Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
And if you’re hopeless, then let me show you (Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
There’s hope in the Jesus way

[Chorus]
I follow Jesus, I follow Jesus
He wore my sin, I’ll gladly wear His name
He is the treasure, He is the answer
Oh, I choose the Jesus way

[Verse 3]
If you strike me, I will embrace you
And if you chain me, I’ll sing His praise
And if you kill me, my home is Heaven
For I choose the Jesus way

[Chorus]
I follow Jesus, I follow Jesus
He wore my sin, I’ll gladly wear His name
He is the treasure, He is the answer
Oh, I choose the Jesus way

[Bridge]
And I choose surrender, I choose to love
Oh God, my Savior, You’ll always be enough
I choose forgiveness, I choose grace
I choose to worship, no matter what I face
I choose the Jesus way, I choose the Jesus way
I choose the Jesus way, I choose the Jesus way

[Chorus]
I follow Jesus, I follow Jesus
He wore my sin, I’ll gladly wear His name
He is the treasure, He is the answer
Oh, I choose the Jesus way
I follow Jesus, I follow Jesus
He wore my sin, I’ll gladly wear His name
He is the treasure, He is the answer
Oh, I choose the Jesus way
Oh, I choose the Jesus way

[Outro]
Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh*

“Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” Ephesians 3:20-21

The Jesus Way – Lyrics – Songwriters: Phil Wickham & Jonathan Smith

Faith Behind the Song: “The Jesus Way” – Phil Wickham – by Scott Savage

Practicing the Way – Course & Free Resources on Spiritual Formation

Worship Wednesday – For Christ-Followers – It’s Surrender – Not Self-Improvement – Deb Mills

Worship Wednesday – First Things First – With Consumed by Fire – Deb Mills

Worship Wednesday – Loving Well, Hating Well

Photo Credit: Destiny City, Don Vess

But to those of you who will listen, I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.Luke 6:27-28

Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, outcry and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and tenderhearted to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ God forgave you.Ephesians 4:31-32

There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers. Proverbs 6:16-19

Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Carefully consider what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible on your part, live at peace with everyone. Do not avenge yourselves, beloved, but leave room for God’s wrath. For it is written: “Vengeance is Mine; I will repay, says the Lord.”Romans 12:17-19

Finally, all of you, be like-minded and sympathetic, love as brothers, be tenderhearted and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.1 Peter 3:8-9

The beginning of this year in the US has been marked with violence in the streets and clashes with federal agents. Social and news media posts are daily filled with critiques of one group of people vs. another one. Whole people groups. Division is high. Fingers pointed. Disdain fueled by distancing. Even Christians against Christians…sadly.

Writer, theologian Trevin Wax posted a blog this past week on something I’d never heard of before – censoriousness. It is defined as “the state of being censorious, which means having a tendency to blame, criticize, or condemn others. It often involves a habit of finding fault and reproaching others for their actions or opinions.”

How to Deal with a Censorious Spirit – Trevin Wax (really excellent read)

In John Bevere‘s book The Bait of Satan, he teaches on how to respond when we are treated unfairly. Our temptation is to react when someone berates or condemns us. We don’t feel understood. The same applies to those toward whom we express contempt. There is always more to the story. The saying “Two things can be true” is applied. Issues brewing in our country are not so simple as one side against another. The causes are multi-layered and complex. Oh for the simple to reign…and in God’s Word, He breaks down the complex. We are to pray for those in opposition to us (and vice versa). We are to be curious and seek understanding. We are not to allow the world and its evil to divide us. We are to remember that God is in control, and it is His prerogative to judge and make things right.

Photo Credit: Charles Brent, Heartlight

Clinical psychologist, leadership expert Dr. Henry Cloud’s describes how to hate well in his small and fascinating book 9 Things a Leader Must Do. He is wise and succinct on all the topics of this book but especially on hating well, and I quote him here:

“Hate is one of the most crucial ingredients of a good person’s character. What we hate says a lot about who we are, what we value, what we care about…Basically, we are defined in part by what we love and what we hate. You can tell a lot about people by what they love…[and] by what they hate…You can depend on people who…hate arrogance, lying, innocent people being hurt, harmful schemes, evil practices, telling lies about others, and things that stir up dissension among people. [the things that God hates – Proverbs 6:16-19]…The first thing that hate does for us is to help us move against certain traits and issues, thus becoming different from them…The second way hate benefits us is that it causes us to protect what we value…The third way that hate is a good thing is the flip side of protection. Hate moves us to destroy bad things, which are often the things that threaten the good. [However] Unsuccessful leaders hate in ways that solve problems as opposed to creating problems…The difference between leaders who hate well and those who hate destructively lies in the difference between two kinds of hate: subjective and objective. Subjective anger [hate] blasts other people, causes overreactions, dissensions, inability to resolve conflict, broken relationships…Make the subjective hatred objective. Transform it to the kind of hate that solves problems, protects things that you value, and stands against the things that you do not want in your life and work…[he/she] shows up with integrated character. When he brings hate, he brings love as well…and respect, kindness, and forgiveness [taking] a hard stand on a touch issue but remaining loving and kind in the process.” – Dr. Henry Cloud, 9 Things a Leader Must Do – pp. 73-83

In hating well, the focus is on unrighteous acts not on the offenders. It’s not personal. Hating well treats all people as God’s image-bearers. He says repeatedly in His Word that He will avenge, He will make right, He will repay. Because He is without sin, He alone knows just how far to go for the sake of redemption. Our own “righteous anger” moves to sin so quickly because the subjective nature of the offense catapults us to hatred, and not in a good way.

Using the name of Jesus to justify mistreatment of image bearers – Instagram post – Kendra Leeanne Kuntz

I was reminded on a zoom call earlier this week that we are one body with many members – some of us are gifted by the Holy Spirit to speak out against evil, others of us are more the encouragers and mercy-givers, still others serve both the church and those experiencing hardship in the world, and still others point us to the Scripture to make sure we believe what God says and not just what we want to believe He says…

For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but think of yourself with sober judgment, according to the measure of faith God has give you. Just as each of us has one body with many members, and not all members have the same function, so in Christ we who are many are one body, and each member belongs to one another. Romans 12:3-5

God calls us to love well (following the example of the Godhead) and to hate well…the same. Only He is the One without sin. He alone can move our hearts to love as He loves and hate as He hates.

Photo Credit: John Stott, Heartlight

Monday Moment Morning – How Can We Keep From Hating? – Deb Mills

Monday Moment Morning – How Can We Keep From Hating?

Photo Credit: Heartlight

This weekend, we in the State of Virginia had our governor’s inauguration. It was another occasion of either relief and elation or concern and consternation. Our state and nation remains polarized in so many ways.

Can we disagree politically, philosophically, or ideologically…without hating each other?

We are in a season of hating or aligning with whole people groups. Maybe, in all of history, we have such seasons. A season where, if we aren’t careful, we hate a whole group of people or we love that same group, thereby putting us in grave opposition to the “haters”. At least, the news and social media platforms are telling us this is the case.

Whole people groups – be they Somalis, Afghans, Republicans, Democrats, Jews, Evangelical Christians. Whole people groups.

How can we keep from hating?

Maybe an even more core question: do we even want to keep from hating? What do we think is gained by hating another or a group of others?

Oddly, hating people can feel good. We feel justified in hating. Even morally superior. The dilemma here is that hating begets hating. Neuroplasticity is the process in our brain where negative thoughts, and resulting actions, become hard-wired, having a negative impact on our physical and mental health over time.

The Neuroscience of Hate: Why It Feels Good to Be Angry

The Power of Hate and Its Consequences – Andrew Mathews

I don’t want to simplify or downplay the reasons one might have to hate, but the devastating effects of it in our culture, community, families (and in our own brains) are worth taking a step back and considering.

Briefly, here are some actions to consider:

  1. Call to mind the possibility that I hate someone/some peoples. “Check your heart” is a common refrain in my life. If I’m honest, are there persons/people whose actions, or personalities, offend me? Do my speech and attitude betray my hatred? Does this hatred feel justified? If so, do I give myself a pass for feeling such a strong negative emotion?
  2. Consider what is below the surface of my hatred. Do I consider what I feel to be righteous anger? Is it righteous if it moves me toward hatred? In defending the rights of one group of people against another, am I committing the same injustice toward “the offending group” as I see being directed to the one I care more about? Or is fear what stirs me to hate? Or unfairness? We can have any number of reasons to hate. Addressing those reasons (with help, if necessary), brings our hatred more into the light. It doesn’t mean that we don’t seek change in the culture, but with greater care, compassion, and even empathy.
  3. Seek understanding by leaning in to persons whose groups we are tempted to hate. Real, flesh-and-blood, face-to-face conversations can soften our tendency to hate. Asking questions, listening with care, resisting the temptation to argue, leaving the door open for understanding. This is a huge step toward stopping the hate. For those who pray, beginning to pray for that person can grease the tracks for you to love them – pray for her/his needs to be met, for protection and peace, for paths forward that don’t further divide us.

Photo Credit: QuoteFancy, Margaret Walker

8 Ideas for Managing Hatred – Michael Karson, Ph.D., J.D. – Psychology Today

4. Recognize that hating what is evil is different than hating people. Hatred dehumanizes people. Remember the persons with whom we disagree have children, parents, jobs, their own hopes, fears and strivings – just like us. They may even have a faith similar to ours…but the issue has overcome us/them and has pushed itself into paramount position. Extinguishing civility. We may actually agree on a wrong, if we acknowledge that we’re all trying to sort out the right path forward.

Photo Credit: Heartlight

5. For those of us who are believers, we have no leave to hate. For Christians, we are called by Christ Jesus to love even our enemies (Matthew 5:44). When hating becomes a habit, especially of a particular people group, we lose our way. Thinking it is almost our duty to hate. We have to guard against self-deceit.

Photo Credit: Heartlight

Peter D. Kaufman, brilliant and highly successful businessman, gives wise counsel in this for all of us: “Go positive and go first, and be constant in doing it.” Determine to love, resist hating, don’t wait for the other person, and in every conversation and encounter, be constant in this effort.

The Multi-disciplinary Approach to Thinking – Peter Kaufman

Young businessman, world-changer Mitchell Wilson recalls Kaufman’s use of the phrase mirrored reciprocation. How this applies is when we engage others with love, listening as we seek understanding, being gentle where we disagree, we often get the same responses in return.

Wilson writes: “Peter doesn’t go into this in his speech [above], but I can’t help but think of Jesus’s core teachings that relate to the principle of mirrored reciprocation:

  • Love your neighbor as yourself
  • Do unto others as you would have them do unto you
  • Forgive those who trespass against you
  • Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy
  • Turn the other cheek”

Mirrored Reciprocation: Peter Kaufman’s Profoundly Simple Insight That Helps You Achieve An Enjoyable Life | Blog

6. Don’t give up on developing the habit of loving instead of hating. This is definitely a spiritual disciple and a habit worthy of pursuing. Peter Kaufman also has counsel, from his talk above The most powerful force that could be potentially harnessed is dogged incremental constant progress over a very long time frame. We are going to have to fight against hating, especially if we have allowed it to take up real estate in our minds. However, as with anything worth mastering, the work needed to keep from hating will yield its fruit…if we don’t give up.

Photo Credit: Heartlight

[This blog was inspired by recent, terrible events in our country and also by the sermon at Movement Church yesterday. Our pastor Cliff unpacked Matthew 5:38-42 (YouTube video linked; image below) about showing radical love by resisting retaliation. Can’t wait for his sermon next week on “Love your Enemies” which may end up inspiring a Part 2 on this topic. Hope you stay with me for that one.]

Photo Credit: Heartlight