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Monday Morning Moment – Word for the New Year – Trust – the Object of Our Trust Matters

December 30, 2024 admindeb Leave a comment

Photo Credit: Heartlight, Verse of the Day

[Adapted from the Archives]

Following is a brief history of how choosing and exploring a word for the year became a habit for me starting in 2020. If you want, just skip down to the highlighted start of 2025 that takes you to this year.

In 2020 (the year of COVID), I read Debbie Macomber‘s book One Perfect Word. She tells fascinating stories of persons’ choosing a word to guide their year. Finishing her book and praying a bit, the word compassion became my focus. 2021 was a good year for that as we dealt with so many divisions over COVID, race, politics, etc. Compassion for all on both sides of each issue.

At first I wasn’t going to do “a word” for 2022, and then a rapid series of “coincidences” drew me to the word: joy. As that year ended, I had become negative and even a bit cynical. Still having faith in God but not so much in humans, including myself. Even after a year of compassion!!

5 Friday Faves – New Year’s Resolutions, Habit Planner, Year-End Review, Joy – the Word for the Year, and the Last Days of 2021 – Deb Mills

Then 2023 followed, and I chose the word “wonder”. It was inspired by my study of Dr. Curt Thompson’s books. He encourages a pursuit of mental health and healing including staying “in the path of oncoming beauty”. This focus on wonder – in searching out beauty in the context of community and a loving God – brought me through a year tougher than I imagined it would be.

Monday Morning Moment – Word for the Year 2023 – Wonder – Deb Mills

Then at the end of 2023, I’d been lamenting being older (i.e. weaker, more frail). Having lost 2 inches in stature (just in the years of pounding on my vertebra) also made me feel small. I’ve decided to push back against the weakness and seemingly diminished nature of getting older. After all, what does that even mean?! I’m not that old. Right?

In Joshua 14, Caleb was 85 years old. He gives a beautiful and faith-filled declaration: “I am still as strong today as I was on the day Moses sent me; as my strength was then, so my strength is now, for war and for going out and coming in. Now then, give me this hill country about which the Lord spoke on that day, for you heard on that day that Anakim (giants) were there, with great fortified cities; perhaps the Lord will be with me, and I will drive them out just as the Lord has spoken.” [Joshua 14:11-12.]

Talking to Dave (that husband of mine), he commented that Caleb had that strength for which I was longing because he had “a different spirit in him” (Numbers 14:24). Whereas the 10 spies and the Israelites influenced by them were driven by a spirit of fear, Caleb was filled by the Spirit of God. In his determination to obey and follow wholeheartedly, his faith emboldened him. He demonstrated strength physically, mentally, and spiritually.

He would not be defined by age, aptitude, or ability…but by the great and gracious God he sought to serve. That’s what I have longed for in this year soon to be ending. To be strong. In all ways possible. Including strong in my love for God and others. This can only be mine if nested in being filled with the very Spirit of God.

Ironically, or not so much with the Lord, I have struggled with even more physical weakness (a painful and limiting hip pain) but not without working toward being strong again. Months ago, in choosing “strong” as the word for this year, God knew. In this season still, I am reminded of His goodness. “For when I am weak (and it will happen), then His strength is manifested perfectly and completely!” (2 Corinthians 12:10)

He keeps His promises.

Monday Morning Moment – Word for the New Year – Strong (Nested in “Filled” – There’s a Story) – Deb Mills

Now we stand at the start of 2025.

These last days of December 2024, I have pondered what word would be a fixed point for this coming year. New Year’s resolutions and habit formation are both great helps for my slightly scattered brain. This Word of the Year exercise (which will span the next year) has also been a tremendous help.

The word “trust” has come to mind, in my times in the Word, in recent conversations, and in circumstances beyond my control. “Trust” – whew! That word has always been troubling for me. I think we put too much importance on trusting people – we will all disappoint and fail each other. It happens. Will I put that same bias on God, or can I treat Him as He is and as the Trustworthy One He reveals Himself to be?

Trust – Why Trust matters – Psychology Today – Trusting others and being trustworthy matter, but human trust is flawed and has to be handled with some measure of understanding and grace.

The object of our trust can’t be on people but on God. He alone will not disappoint. He alone will always keep His promises.

Praying to trust God more seems to carry the same human-borne threat of praying for patience. Yikes! We want more patience but not the sorts of experiences that will bring it. Is God drawing me to focus on trust in 2025 because I’m going to need it more? No…refusing to think there would be any negative outcome with trusting God more. It is a beautiful thing and He is worthy.

Just yesterday Dave and I talked about trust and what it means. He defined it as having confidence that someone (including God, of course) will be who he/she says they are and will do what they say they will do. Again, as humans, we don’t always prove to be trust-worthy…and we apply grace, not unforgiveness. But God!!! We can have complete confidence in Him. Complete trust.

“The biblical definition of trust goes beyond mere belief or reliance. It involves a complete surrender and reliance on God, knowing that He is faithful and will fulfill His promises. Trust, according to biblical definition, is the means of putting aside our own understanding and leaning on God’s wisdom and guidance. It means acknowledging that God’s ways are higher than our ways and trusting that He is in control of all things. Trust requires us to have faith, to believe in the unseen and to confidently depend on God’s faithfulness. It is an unwavering assurance that God is trustworthy and will never fail us. This biblical concept of trust is not just a casual belief, but an active and intentional decision to place our confidence in God alone.” – Daniel, Prayer Warrior – Bible Definition Of Trust (How The Lord Defines Trusting Him) – Read the whole article!

God Is a Way-maker – How to Trust God with the Impossible – Daniel – Prayer Warrior – DailyEffectivePrayer.org

I am going to turn my heart toward trusting God in 2025 for small and big things – for situations only He can move toward healing and wholeness. For the prodigals in my life. For a family rift that continues unchanged since 2020. For salvation for some dear friends (and family) I love deeply (and God loves more). For direction in moment-by-moment turns in life (eyes on Him instead of my own faulty decision-making). For grace to trust He is creating beauty even in and through me. Finally, trusting God for all those previous word lessons He has begun in my life to continue to grow into maturity – compassion, joy, wonder, and strength.

Photo Credit: Oswald Chambers, image source unknown

Worship Wednesday – No Matter What I Will Trust in You – Lauren Daigle – Deb Mills

YouTube Video – Do I Trust You? – Twila Paris – my absolute favorite song on trust

Top 25 Oswald Chambers Quotes – AZ Quotes

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Saturday Short – Gratitude and the Brain – and a Musical Assist by Benjamin William Hastings

November 30, 2024 admindeb Leave a comment

Adapted from the Archives

Have you noticed the increased expressions of gratitude on your social media? At least in the US, we are winding down from Thanksgiving Day festivities. Some of us take this occasion as an opportunity, through the month of November, to daily and publicly express our gratitude. Based on what we know from research, this could make this time of the year one of our happiest and least stressful of the year.

Below you’ll find quotes from some of these authors, reporting on both clinical research and anecdotal data that support how the practice of gratitude can actually alter our habits of thinking and our sense of well-being. It’s all good for us and those around us.

“Our brain is always on alert to threat and is more predisposed to look at the negative side of life [stress response]. There are many things that happen to us everyday that are positive but we don’t notice them because we are always looking for the next threat to us. Now these actions are below our level of awareness. It takes some concerted effort to get our brain to move to the positive side of life. And that is where paying attention and expressing gratitude plays a role in establishing that positive mindset. When we start to place attention on the positive events in our life our brain responds by producing the neurotransmitter dopamine…We do feel better when dopamine is flowing but that also makes are brain want more – so it becomes the motivating neurotransmitter also…In addition, the brain loves confirmation bias: it looks for things that prove what it already believes to be true. Dopamine then strengthens that action. So if you start seeing things in your life that you are grateful for, your brain will start looking for more things to be grateful for.” – Patricia Faust, How Gratitude Affects the Brain

Six Habits of Highly Grateful People:

Once in awhile, they think about death and loss. – As we think of past losses and future losses (say of those we love), we remember and reflect on the good we’ve known in those situations or relationships. Of future losses, we then take action to savor and bless those persons while we have them near.
They take time to smell the roses. – Whether our current situation feels difficult or just mundane, we look for the beauty.
They take the good things as gifts, not birthrights. – We see entitlement for the life-diminishing thing it is.
They’re grateful to people, not just things. – We can be thankful for great food, for blue skies, for warm clothing, but we go beyond that to the one(s) who provided the good we have.
They mention the pancakes. Being grateful for the specific little things disciplines us to enlarge our gratitude for the greater things in our lives. Those things that can cause stress if we don’t remember the value and significance in them.
They thank outside the box. Even in adversity or hard times, we can find things for which to be grateful. Gratefulness doesn’t minimize the difficulty; it actually strengthens us to endure.

Six Habits of Highly Grateful People – Jeremy Adam Smith

“Given its magnetic appeal, it is a wonder that gratitude might be rejected. Yet it is. If we fail to choose it, by default we choose ingratitude. Millions make this choice every day.

Why? Provision, whether supernatural or natural, becomes so commonplace that it is easily accepted for granted. We believe the universe owes us a living. We do not want to be beholden. Losing sight of protection, favors, benefits and blessings renders a person spiritually and morally bankrupt. It’d be hard to improve upon the words of our 16th President in 1863:

‘We have grown in numbers, wealth and power as no other nation ever has grown; but we have forgotten God! We have forgotten the gracious Hand which preserved us in peace, and multiplied and enriched and strengthened us; and we have vainly imagined, in the deceitfulness of our hearts, that all these blessings were produced by some superior wisdom and virtue of our own.’” – What Gets in the Way of Gratitude? – Robert Emmons

8 Ways to Express Your Gratitude

Keep a gratitude journal.
Write a gratitude letter to a past mentor or teacher.
Count how many things you can find to be grateful for in each room of your home.
Listen to a guided gratitude meditation [my suggestion if you don’t prefer guided meditation: spend some time in the Psalms].
Start business meetings with a “what went well” one-sentence reflection.
Savor receiving thanks.
Take a daily photo of something you are grateful for and post to Instagram or Facebook, tagging it with #365project.
Try a gratitude jar or tree. – Tamara Lechner, The Neuroscience Behind Gratitude: How Does Cultivating Appreciation Affect Your Brain?

So…what are you grateful for at this moment?

And for me? More than I can count…including these two songs:

How Gratitude Changes You and Your Brain – Joshua Brown, Joel Wong

How Gratitude Can Help You Through Hard Times – Robert Emmons

Choosing Gratitude: Your Journey to Joy – Nancy Leigh DeMoss

The Science of Gratitude – a White Paper – UC Berkeley

Photo Credit: Robert Emmons, Greater Good, Daily Good

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Worship Wednesday – Peace & Goodwill – I Heard the Bells – Casting Crowns

November 13, 2024 admindeb 2 Comments

Then the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all people. For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord…And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying:

“Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, goodwill toward men!” – Luke 2:10-11, 13-14

For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given, and the government will be upon His shoulders. And He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the increase of His government and peace there will be no end. He will reign on the throne of David and over his kingdom, to establish and sustain it with justice and righteousness from that time and forevermore. The zeal of the LORD of Hosts will accomplish this. – Isaiah 9:6-7

One week ago this morning, I woke to the results of the 2024 US presidential election. Before going to bed in the early hours of today, I prayed, wanting to trust the outcome to Him. Wanting to believe Him for whatever direction our country would go. Affirming that the Scripture validates that He is sovereign, and we are in His care.

As the week has unfolded around our nation, social media and news outlets are filled with a range of both shock and jubilation. Of fear and relief. We continue a nation divided…for now. May the church not be a vessel of division…but an instrument of God’s peace.

In December, 1863, American poet and scholar Henry W. Longfellow received his wounded son home from battle. It was Christmas time, and the U.S. Civil War raged on. Having already lost his wife years earlier, Longfellow nursed his son, Charley, back to health. His own thoughts, in turmoil over all that was happening around him, he poured out in the poem “Christmas Bells”.

Longfellow clearly took comfort from God as he wrote, ending the poem with this stanza:

“God is not dead, nor doth He sleep;
The Wrong shall fail,
The Right prevail,
With peace on earth, good-will to men.”*

I Heard the Bells is a Christmas carol, not a worship anthem. Yet, given the continuing wars of our day, and the politics surrounding them, we must tend the fires of our hope. God is the “lifter of our heads” (Psalm 3:3). He is the One who gives strength to our “weak hands and shaking knees” (Isaiah 35:3). He will do as He’s promised. He is faithful. When you hear the bells ring where you are in the wake of this election and as the Christmas season dawns, take heart in that. We must continue to pray for His peace on earth. We can be vessels of His good-will toward our neighbors, both near and far away.

Listening for “the right [to] prevail” is where we stand, as Christ-followers. Straight and resolute in our understanding of God’s intentions and His movement in our world. We can resist and refuse to add to the noise of hopelessness and cynicism in this world. We bend our hearts to hear the voice of God speak through the chaos…speaking the peace that only He can bring…through our Savior and Lord, Jesus Christ.

Worship with me…

I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day (Lyric video)

I heard the bells on Christmas day
Their old familiar carols play
And mild and sweet their songs repeat
Of peace on earth good will to men

And the bells are ringing (Peace on Earth)
Like a choir they’re singing (Peace on Earth)
In my heart I hear them
Peace on earth, good will to men

And in despair I bowed my head
There is no peace on earth I said
For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men

But the bells are ringing (Peace on Earth)
Like a choir singing (Peace on Earth)
Does anybody hear them?
Peace on earth, good will to men

Then rang the bells more loud and deep
God is not dead, nor doth He sleep (Peace on Earth, peace on Earth)
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail
With peace on earth, good will to men

Then ringing singing on its way

The world revolved from night to day
A voice, a chime, a chant sublime
Of peace on earth, good will to men

And the bells they’re ringing (Peace on Earth)
Like a choir they’re singing (Peace on Earth)
And with our hearts we’ll hear them
Peace on earth, good will to men

Do you hear the bells they’re ringing? (Peace on Earth)
The life the angels singing (Peace on Earth)
Open up your heart and hear them (Peace on Earth)
Peace on earth, good will to men

Peace on earth, Peace on earth
Peace on earth, Good will to men*

Photo Credit: Dr. Rex; Jill Jackson Miller

* Lyrics to “I Heard the Bells” – Casting Crowns

YouTube Video – Casting Crowns performing I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day

Christmas Carol Soldier – Story of Charley Appleton Longfellow & the occasion for H. W. Longfellow’s writing of the poem/lyric

The Story Behind I Heard the Bells On Christmas Day – Tom Stewart

*Longfellow’s poem Christmas Bells

YouTube Video – Let There Be Peace on Earth – Jakarta Philharmonic Children’s Choir

YouTube Video – Let There Be Peace on Earth – Vince Gill, Amy Grant, Chet Akins, & Michael McDonald 1993

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Monday Morning Moment – Finishing Strong – On the Anniversary of Mom’s Glorious Homegoing

November 4, 2024 admindeb 6 Comments

[Adapted from the Archives]

We have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed – always carrying about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body. – 2 Corinthians 4:7-10

My Mom was a young 72 when she was diagnosed with cancer. A year younger than I am right now. We were overseas at the time, and I wanted so to be home with her. She was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma – supposedly “the best kind of cancer you can have”. Highly treatable. Long remissions. Often cured. Mom would still die after 3 years of intensive, and sometimes experimental, chemotherapy. She never caught a break. Yet, she didn’t look at it that way.

Her journey with God in those days was other-worldly. The Mom I knew loved to serve people, and cancer would not stop that. She had grown up poor and with a dad who could be mean when he drank. She dreamed of college but it was never meant to be. Instead she became a student of life, and she never tired of that. She was a beautiful blend of Mary and Martha – wholly satisfied whether “sitting at the feet of Jesus” or serving the needs of those around her. I love that she was my Mom.

She taught me how to live…and she taught me how to die. We were home in the States when Mom’s cancer finished its course in her. She never spent a night in the hospital throughout those three years. She stubbornly guarded her time at home and had the will and the support (of my Dad, family and friends) to endure from home…and there was God, holding her tight against the storm.

Mom never prayed for healing, but we did. Mom prayed that this cancer, the illness and all that was part of it (including a devastating Shingles-related neuralgia), would bring glory to God. Her prayer was answered, and ours, ultimately, in Heaven.

Her dying took three days. If you had known my Mom, you knew a person that was all about life – helping and encouraging others, pointing them to God, determined, in faith, to make sense of what seemed utter nonsense. She continued to be about that until she went into a coma the last day. While she was awake that final weekend, I asked her (over and again) how she was. One time, I remember, she nodded a bit, and whispered, “I’m O.K.” It was her face that spoke volumes. Forehead lifted, blue eyes bright, an almost sunny expression. That “I’m O.K.” was accompanied by an almost delighted look of marvel…of wonder. Like, “Wow! I really am O.K.!” God was meeting her at the point of her greatest need.

Mom and I have always had amazing talks about the deep things of God and life. She told me one time that she envied us our certainty of His call to a life overseas. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard God speak so clearly to me,” she lamented. In the last days of her life, it came to me to ask her if she heard God speak to her lately. She answered right away, with that same look of wonder, “All the time!” If cancer had to be the instrument of such grace, then it became a gift to her.

Mom entered Eternity during the reading of 2 Corinthians 4:7-10 (see above). Her young pastor and his wife came unexpectedly that evening, rushing in, wide-eyed, as if on a mission. We brought them back to her room, and they sat with us, around her bed. She had been unresponsive all day. Her pastor opened his Bible and began reading. Mom had this sweet habit of knitting her forehead and shaking her head, in response to something that touched her heart. As he read, after being quiet and still all day, she knit her forehead and breathed her last. We all felt transfigured in that moment.

Today marks 22 years since Mom went to be with the Lord, and I miss her today and every day. She was so spent when she left us, yet gloriously whole at the same time. A bit of prose from Henry Van Dyke always comes to mind in thinking of her Homegoing.

Gone From My Sight by Henry Van Dyke

I am standing upon the seashore. A ship, at my side, spreads her white sails to the moving breeze and starts for the blue ocean. She is an object of beauty and strength. I stand and watch her until, at length, she hangs like a speck of white cloud just where the sea and sky come to mingle with each other.

Then, someone at my side says, “There, she is gone.”

Gone where?

Gone from my sight. That is all. She is just as large in mast,
hull and spar as she was when she left my side.
And, she is just as able to bear her load of living freight to her destined port.

Her diminished size is in me — not in her.

And, just at the moment when someone says, “There, she is gone,”
there are other eyes watching her coming, and other voices
ready to take up the glad shout, “Here she comes!”

Mom taught us how to live…and she taught us how to die. She “fought the good fight…finished the race…and kept the faith.” (2 Timothy 4:7). For us, there is still a race to be run.

Thanks, Mom, for showing us how it’s done. See you at the Finish Line.

When it’s all been said and done
There is just one thing that matters:
Did I do my best to live for truth, did I live my life for You?
When it’s all been said and done
All my treasures will mean nothing
Only what I’ve done for love’s reward
Will stand the test of time.

Lord, Your mercy is so great
That You look beyond our weakness
And find purest gold in miry clay
Making sinners into saints

I will always sing Your praise
Here on earth and ever after
For You’ve shown me Heaven’s my true home
When it’s all been said and done
You’re my life when life is gone.

Lord I’ll live my life for You.

YouTube Video – When It’s All Been Said and Done

Her Children Arise and Call Her Blessed – David Mathis – Charles Spurgeon’s reflections on a Godly mother

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Worship Wednesday – It’s Time to Own Your Belovedness – Sarah Kroger

October 30, 2024 admindeb Leave a comment

The LORD has appeared of old to me, saying: “Yes, I have loved you with an everlasting love; Therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you.” – Jeremiah 31:3

“Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us.” – Ephesians 5:1

““You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” – Romans 5:6-8

“I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.” – Galatians 2:20

Do you have any idea how loved you are?

I’m pretty sure most of us do not. In fact, even those out there still young, successful in their careers, with great looks and all kinds of smarts, and wildly self-confident…even those surely have dark moments of uncertainty.

Just last night, I had one of those hard hits inside my mind that worked its way through my body, leaving me in a pile of emotions. My poor husband. He and God hear those struggles. When a series of events, like a string of falling dominoes, push all the insecurity buttons…and I come of the end of myself. Dr. Curt Thompson and Dan Allender (from last week’s amazing conference) both talked about naming the emotions as part of what heals them…and what brings us back to our senses, so to speak.

In that dark moment last night, I named the terror inside of me: “I can’t seem to do anything well”. There. I probably said it out loud in a more piteous way, but that felt the most real at the moment. In fact, that is part of my salvation testimony – wanting to be good for my sweet mama who had such a weight of responsibility working and raising four kids…and I could never be successful at that “being good”.

Enter a loving Father, a surrendered Savior, and a perfect Comforter.

It doesn’t matter to Him what my performance is nor my appearance while performing. I am loved. Period. Full-stop. He loves me (us) – the undeserved. He is love. He chooses to love – each of us in the holy perfection of divine love. God calls me back to that glorious fact various times through each day.

Last week, at that aforementioned conference, the worship team led us in a song I’d never heard. It was absolutely perfect for that audience and for the theme “Imagination to Incarnation”. The song is “Belovedness” by singer/songwriter Sarah Kroger. It was a worship moment when God wrapped His arms around each of us…as if He was speaking right into our hearts. Have a listen.

No matter the situation, don’t isolate yourself in the darkness. Talk to someone who loves you. Talk to the One who loves you most. Let Him lift the darkness so you can see the truth of His beautiful love for you, Dear One.

Worship with me…and never ever forget how beloved you are. The Lord never does anything half-way.

You’ve owned your fear and all your self-loathing
You’ve owned the voices inside of your head
You’ve owned the shame and reproach of your failure
It’s time to own your belovedness

You’ve owned your past and how it’s defined you
You’ve owned everything everybody else says
It’s time to hear what your Father has spoken
It’s time to own your belovedness

He says you’re Mine, I smiled when I made you
I find you beautiful in every way
My love for you is fierce and unending
I’ll come to find you, whatever it takes
My beloved

You’ve owned the mess you see in the mirror
You’ve owned the lies that you’re just not enough
You’ve been so blinded by all you’re comparing
It’s time to own your belovedness

He says you’re Mine, I smiled when I made you
I find you beautiful in every way
My love for you is fierce and unending
I’ll come to find you, whatever it takes
My beloved

You are completely loved and fully known
Beloved, believe He died to make your heart His home

And He says you’re Mine, I smiled when I made you
I find you beautiful in every way
My love for you is fierce and unending
I’ll come to find you, whatever it takes
He says you’re mine, I smiled when I made you
I find you beautiful in every way
My love for you is fierce and unending
I’ll come to find you, whatever it takes
My beloved
It’s time to own your belovedness*

*Lyrics to Belovedness – Songwriters: Michael Farren, Tony Wood, Sarah Kroger & Ben Shive

YouTube Video – Light: Behind the Songs – Belovedness with Sarah Kroger

Sarah Kroger – “Belovedness” Behind the Song – Lead Worship Well

Three Reasons We Can Trust that God Loves Us with “an Everlasting Love” – Clarence L. Hughes, Jr.

Photo Credit: Darby Cox, Facebook, Charles Spurgeon

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Worship Wednesday – If It Wasn’t For Jesus – Benjamin William Hastings

September 11, 2024 admindeb 4 Comments

[A self-portrait for a photography class. In my 20s. Conflicted. Alone. Yet…not forgotten by God. Whew.]

From that time on many of His disciples turned back and no longer walked with Him. So Jesus asked the Twelve, “Do you want to leave too?” Simon Peter replied, “Lord, to whom would we go? You have the words of eternal life. We believe and know that You are the Holy One of God.” – John 6:66-69

Last year I heard Benjamin William Hastings in concert for the very first time. He doesn’t just sing; he worships. In a large concert space, packed with people, he seemed so small on the stage (and I was seated close-up). Partly because of the humility in his posture and countenance, and mostly because he pointed us, through his lyrics and singing, to the larger presence in the room. Jesus.

[I’ve written about several of his songs already in this blog. Find them here.]

Hastings’ newest single is “If It Wasn’t for Jesus”. It took me back to my disordered youth and it also resonates with me today in this disordered world of ours.

Somewhere around the age of 6, my family started going to church. I had solid teaching there for sure. Still the world presses in, and between that and my own fleshly desires for the approval of others, I faltered in my faith. During college especially and then in my 20s working in a high-pressure secular environment. It didn’t seem like I could follow Jesus and also be considered winsome in the world’s eyes. I was so deceived back then. Still “attending” church every week, even in the role of leading youth, and yet double-minded. Wanting to have the favor of those in my workspace, and pleasing those in my social circle, while also enjoying the honor of my position in church. Looking back, I still shudder at the deceit that bound me up in those days.

God did not forget me in those days. He drew me back to Himself. Thankful for Godly friends and mentors who pointed me to Him, spoke truth to me in love, and held me close until I came to my senses.

I don’t know much of Benjamin William Hastings’ story, but his music gives the message that God is so much bigger than our failures. His love is perfect, and in our weakness, He faithfully demonstrates His strength. I didn’t take sin seriously in those days, but, praise God, He did not let me slip too far from Him.

“My new single ‘If it wasn’t for Jesus’ is all about reflecting on where I’d be if it wasn’t for these amazing divine encounters with God, and then arriving at gratitude because of the intervention of God.” – Benjamin William Hastings

Looking at life today, like Hastings, I am constantly grateful. In the midst of the crazy of this world, I know that God is with us and will, as He has promised, work good for His children and glory for His beautiful, righteous triune Self.

Like Hastings sings: Only God knows where I’d be without Him…but I can confirm (based on my past and the weakness of our flesh without Him) it would not be pretty. I don’t have to be plagued with that thought anymore. He did what He had to do to save me and bring me out of death into life, and I will walk with Him, however imperfectly, until the day we meet face to face forever.

What’s your story? Please leave a comment if you want to…

“Your love, Lord, since I found it [Don’t wanna live without it]. Hands high, open-hearted. Where would I be without Your love, Lord!”

Worship with me:

Don’t know how I ever did it
Go a day without You in it
Guess You were and I just missed it
For all the ways that life worked out
When I look back, man there’s no doubt
How lost I’d be right now

If it wasn’t for Jesus, God knows where I’d be
Still tryna find healing in all the wrong things
Thinking I knew ’bout freedom with chains on my feet
All rhyme and no reason
All me and no meaning
If it wasn’t for Jesus
If it wasn’t for Jesus

Don’t know why You ever did it
Trading places with a cynic
Gave your life while I dismissed it
But in my mess, or in my doubts
You reached through hell, You brought me out
I doubt I’d still be here right now

If it wasn’t for Jesus, God knows where I’d be
Still tryna find healing in all the wrong things
Oh I remember the feeling, without You it’s bleak
All rhyme and no reason
All me and no meaning
If it wasn’t for

Your love Lord
Since I found it
Don’t wanna live without it
Hands high
Open hearted
Where would I be without
Your love Lord
Since I found it
Don’t wanna live without it
Hands high
Open hearted
Where would I be

If it wasn’t for Jesus
If it wasn’t for Jesus
I’d still be falling to pieces, but missing a piece
All rhyme and no reason
All me and no meaning
If it wasn’t for

Your love Lord
Since I found it
Don’t wanna live without it
Hands high
Open hearted
Where would I be without
Your love Lord
Since I found it
Don’t wanna live without it
Hands high
Open hearted

Where would I be without it*

Benjamin William Hastings

*Lyrics to “If It Wasn’t For Jesus” – Songwriter: Benjamin William Hastings

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Monday Morning Moment – Whenever Possible, Affirmation and Encouragement Over Criticism

September 9, 2024 admindeb 4 Comments

Let’s say you need to have a difficult conversation with someone…a crucial conversation. How do we make it happen and still preserve the relationship, the trust between us? We’ve all heard of (and probably experienced the “feedback sandwich” – start with the positive, then interject the negative, and finish off with a last positive (see here for the many takes on this approach). This approach doesn’t wash anymore, right? It’s just not honest.

I’d like to point to a great piece written by a pastor. Well, he was a pastor until last Fall when he resigned from his position because of what was labeled as “harsh leadership”. Scott Sauls, this pastor, until last year, was a gifted Bible teacher and celebrated author (I’ve read many of his books). He was mentored for years by the late Timothy Keller who was himself a man of great integrity. Keller walked the talk…always.

Scott Sauls was this sort of man also…and in the months after he resigned from the pastorate, he has done the work of restoration…reconciling with those he led (not always well) and returning to a work where he is using what he’s learned to help others not make his same mistakes.

His blog “Speaking Words that Make Souls Stronger” has the clarity of one who hasn’t always spoken the truth in love and yet understands the cost of ill-spoken words. He has corrected course. His counsel is weighty and life-giving:

“In a sincere effort to “speak the truth,” we can lose our way and miss the fact that truth — in order to be true in the truest sense — must be packaged in a love that is patient, kind, does not envy or boast, is not proud or dishonoring, is not self-seeking or easily angered, that keeps no record of wrongs, that does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth, that always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres, and that never fails (1 Corinthians 13:4-7).“

“Rather than rushing to find fault, we have every reason proactively seek opportunities to, as Tim Keller called it, ‘catch others doing good’ and to encourage (put courage into) others.”

“Does that mean we just “live and let live” when we see friends and family exhibiting destructive behaviors? Of course not. When someone in our lives is caught in addiction or destructive behavior, the loving thing to do is to help them out of it through intervention.

But intervention is not damning criticism; it’s redemptive critique that is motivated by restoring and building up. Criticism aims to harm and shame. Critique, on the other hand, seeks to leave a person feeling cared for and called to become a better version of themselves. Criticism will leave a person feeling belittled and beaten down. Paul says, ‘If anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness‘ (Galatians 6:1-2).”

“Sometimes love calls us to be courageous because it takes courage to offer the gift of redemptive critique. It also takes courage to receive the same…So, critique redemptively when you must. And at all times, for God’s sake, affirm and encourage. Put courage into a soul — wherever and whenever you can.”

I appreciate Scott Sauls. He may still have days when he is tempted to be critical of others…probably does have those days. Yet, it sounds like he has gained wisdom from those days. And we all benefit from it.

Photo Credit: Martin Luther King Jr., Heartlight

Photo Credit: Crucial Conversations, Reading Graphics

We all have situations that require hard conversations. They can be less hard as we incorporate a gentler, but no less honest approach. “Speaking the truth in love”. Not backing away from conflict, but “using our words” to affirm and encourage when possible. Then when necessary, practicing a redemptive critique rather than a harsh criticism. Genuinely caring for the welfare of the other person communicates more than we may think. The conversation still happens (don’t shy away from it), but it can be restorative.

Bottom line: To have an effective, impactful hard conversation, you have to love the person in front of you. If your care only extends to the mission of your organization, the health of your family, or your own personal interests/concerns, the outcome you want will evade you. You can care about those things, of course. You probably wouldn’t push to have the conversation if you didn’t. The first step to that conversation has to be a heart check on yourself. The key motivation has to be that you genuinely care about the person in front of you. That changes everything, including the tone of your words and your approach. If you love someone, you communicate it (in the workplace, organization, family, friendship). If you don’t love that person, the conversation won’t turn out redemptively for you, the other person, or the situation. Loving that person matters.

Monday Morning Moment – Use Your Words – Deb Mills

5 Friday Faves – Beyond the Guitar’s “Spirit”, Reducing Brain Fog, Crucial Conversations, the Precious Nature of Life, and What We Have in Common – Deb Mills (esp. the Faves of “Crucial Conversations” and also “What We Have in Common”

Monday Morning Moment – Strengthening Decision-making with Collaborative Conversations – Deb Mills

Two of Scott Sauls’ blogs below – wisdom

Weeping in Nashville – Where Is God When Unspeakable Acts Beget Unspeakable Sorrow? – Scott Sauls

Once Upon a Time, Tolkien Felt Like a Failure – Give Your Failure Some Time, and It May Become Your Truest Success – Scott Sauls

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Worship Wednesday – Count It All Joy – That’s the Thing About Praise – Benjamin William Hastings & Blessing Offor

August 28, 2024 admindeb Leave a comment

Photo Credit: Oswald Chambers, Heartlight

Oh, sing to the Lord a new song!
For He has done marvelous things;
His right hand and His holy arm have gained Him the victory.
²The Lord has made known His salvation;
His righteousness He has revealed in the sight of the nations.
³He has remembered His mercy and His faithfulness to the house of Israel;
All the ends of the earth have seen the salvation of our God.

⁴Shout joyfully to the Lord, all the earth;
Break forth in song, rejoice, and sing praises.
⁵Sing to the Lord with the harp,
With the harp and the sound of a psalm,
⁶With trumpets and the sound of a horn;
Shout joyfully before the Lord, the King.

⁷Let the sea roar, and all its fullness,
The world and those who dwell in it;
⁸Let the rivers clap their hands;
Let the hills be joyful together
⁹ before the Lord,
For He is coming to judge the earth.
With righteousness He shall judge the world,
And the peoples with equity. – Psalm 98

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. – James 1:2-4

Don’t you love when something significant happens twice, just in case you missed it the first time around? This weekend, I took a couple of Afghan girls to see the film Inside Out 2. They had been wanting to see it all summer and we finally made it happen. Being teenaged girls themselves, they were mesmerized by all the familiar emotions depicted in the film – joy, sadness, disgust, fear, anger, anxiety, envy, embarrassment, and ennui (boredom). We all counted on the sprightly “joy” character to help Riley, the girl in the film, hold onto the sweetness of her life in the midst of all that caused her distress. Joy! She had to work really hard to make sure Riley’s life was happy. [Great movie! Exhausting and exhilarating!]

YouTube Video – Inside Out 2 – All Joy Scenes Recap

Then the next day, Pastor Cliff preached on Psalm 98. The psalmist calls the people of God to worship their (our) King. No spectators here! All of creation sounds an anthem of praise to a righteous, merciful, faithful, and just God. The tone of this psalm was that of great joy…not buoyed by happy circumstances, but grounded on the presence and personhood of almighty God.

Therefore, no matter what’s happening in our lives – whatever emotions are evoked – we can count it all joy, when we walk with Him.

Writer, speaker Mel Walker defines Biblical joy as “choosing to respond to external circumstances with inner contentment and satisfaction, because we know that God will use these experiences to accomplish His work in and through our lives.” He breaks joy down into 3 components:

God, Himself, is the source of our joy.
We can choose to respond to life’s trials with joy when we consider God’s purpose for those times of suffering.
It is possible to have joy to the fullest even during life’s most difficult times.

Like in the film, we have conversations in our head, with God, and each other. We can’t always work out meaning or the why’s of our situations, and we’re tempted to default to the negative (and all the accompanying emotions). God calls us to look to Him to sort things out, and in trusting Him, we can enjoy that settled joy in our hearts. No matter what.

An example of a simple joy in my life is this: Jon Schmidt‘s arrangement of A Poor Wayfairing Man of Grief. It is an instrumental piece on my sweet husband’s Sunday morning playlist. I want to be up and out in the living room, coffee in hand, when it plays. This piece, all piano and strings, has several beautiful rises and falls. There is this one interval (starting at around 5 1/2 minutes) that builds to an incredible crescendo 30 seconds in. It strikes joy in my heart, every single time.

Simple, beautiful reminders of the God who loves us and will take us through all of life.

When the psalmist calls us to sing a new song to the Lord, here’s one: “That’s the Thing About Praise” by songwriters Benjamin William Hastings and Blessing Offor.

Worship with me…and count it all joy. Whatever’s going on right now, choosing joy is the way through. Hallelujah!

When the rain you want is a flood instead
And the roses bloom, but they’re not quite red
And when I reach the edge of my bravery
I’ll still be singin’ at the banks of an un-parted sea

Sometimes the only way through it is a hallelujah
(The only way through it is a hallelujah)
Sometimes the only thing to do is just to give it to You
(The only thing to do is just to give it to You)
And though my troubles shake me
I know they will never move You
Sometimes the only way through it is a hallelujah
(Hallelujah)
That’s why I say hallelujah
Hallelujah

There’s what I want and then there’s where I’m at
Every one step forward, it got me five steps back
And I cried, I called, God knows I prayed
But most days faith is climbin’ up a mountain that stayed

That’s why the only way through it is a hallelujah
(The only way through it is a hallelujah)
Sometimes the only thing to do is just to hand it to You
(The only thing to do is just to hand it to You)
And although my troubles shake me
I know they could never move You
Sometimes the only way through it is a hallelujah
(Hallelujah)
Hallelujah (Hallelujah)
Hallelujah (Hallelujah)
That’s why I say hallelujah
Hallelujah

It don’t always fix your problems
But it’ll tell you how small they are
That’s the thing about praise
That’s the thing about praise
It won’t always move the mountain
But it’s good for the heart
That’s the thing about praise
That’s the thing about praise
You’ll never know what it’s gonna change
But it’ll always leave a mark
That’s the thing about praise
That’s the thing about praise
Yeah, I might see walls start fallin’
Or it might just change my heart
That’s the thing about praise
That’s the thing about praise (Oh)
That’s the thing about praise
That’s the thing about praise, woah

And the only way through it is a hallelujah
(The only way through it is a hallelujah)
Sometimes the only thing to do is just to hand it to You
(The only thing to do is just to hand it to You)
And although my troubles shake me
I know they could never move You
The only way through it is a hallelujah
(Hallelujah)

That’s the thing about praise
You never know what it’ll change, change, change
That’s why I say hallelujah
Hallelujah
Oh, that’s the thing about praise
You don’t even know what it’s about to change (You never know what it’ll change, change, change)
That’s why I say hallelujah (Hey)
Hallelujah*

*Lyrics to That’s the Thing About Praise – Songwriters: Benjamin William Hastings, Hang Bentley, Blessing Chibueze Offor

Favorite Moments and Quotes from Inside Out 2 – Down The Hobbit Hole Blog

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Worship Wednesday – His Mercy Is More – Matt Papa & Matt Boswell

August 21, 2024 admindeb Leave a comment

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I set aside childish ways. Now we see but a dim reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love; but the greatest of these is love. – 1 Corinthians 13:11-13

The wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. – Romans 6:23

God’s law was given so that all people could see how sinful they were. But as people sinned more and more, God’s wonderful grace became more abundant. – Romans 5:20

The seriousness of sin has been on my mind lately, reading through John Mark Comer‘s book “Live No Lies: Recognize and Resist the Three Enemies that Sabotage Your Peace”. Those enemies are Satan (“the father of lies”), the world (that tempts us to live in whatever way we choose, encouraging self-deception), and our own flesh (“the heart wants what it wants”). We all sin. It is why Jesus had to die for us, because none of us have the ability to restore our own standing before a holy God. He loves us. Full stop. Our problem is letting sin get between us and God…and it will. Lying, for instance, births deceit. When we think we can get away with lying, we fall into even more trouble, inside our own heads, in relationship with others, and with God. Satan, the world, and our own flesh deceive us into thinking that sin is not such a big deal. Wrong! It separates us from God and each other, destroying our peace and joy.

Our flesh can be bent toward any number of self-gratifying sins. In reading Comer’s book, I was reminded of “The 7 Deadly Sins” is a grouping that covers many. This list goes back to the early church (Tertullian, Evagrius Ponticus). At some point in my life, I have struggled with all of these, as you might have as well.

The Lord loves us. When we continue in sin, treating it casually and indulgently, we step away from Him, His love, and His protection and provision. Repentance is how we overcome sin. We take it seriously and we confront it (sometimes multiple times through the day) in the power of the Holy Spirit.

Taking Sin Seriously (Luke 17:1-4) – Bob Deffinbaugh

“The truth is our sins are overwhelming. The magnitude of their number is enormous. We are natural born sinners. There are so many terrible or shameful things we’ve done, thought, and said. There are so many good things that we neglected, failed to do, or refused to do. We identify with the confession of Ezra that “our iniquities have risen higher than our heads, and our guilt has mounted up to the heavens.” (Ezra 9:6) Likewise, we sing with solidarity the lyrics of David’s lament, “My iniquities have gone over my head; like a heavy burden, they are too heavy for me” (Psalm 38:4). We are sinners and there’s no doubt about it. Our rap sheet says it all as it piles into a heap rising high above our heads. This dark and dismal reality is enough to make our palms sweat.

And that’s where the gospel bursts forth with explosive mercy! The mercy of God is greater than your sin. The grace of God is stronger than your sin. The kindness of God overwhelms your sin. The compassion of God smothers your sin. The goodness of God is literally larger than your sin. Do you believe it yet? Is it sinking in? Do you feel the stronghold of shame beginning to erode under the force of God’s mercy? This is why we call it good news. There is no better news for sinners like us. Praise God.” – Josh Maloy

The Story of the Song: “His Mercy Is More” – Josh Maloy

Matt Papa was inspired, in the writing of the contemporary hymn “His Mercy Is More”, by a letter written by John Newton to a man in his church who struggled with doubt and besetting sin. John Newton was once a British slave trader who finally came under the conviction of sin by the Holy Spirit. The weight of that sin and the goodness of God to save him upon his repentance led to him writing the song “Amazing Grace”. Below is an excerpt from that letter which Matt discovered and was moved to write “His Mercy Is More”.

“You have one hard lesson to learn, that is, the evil of your own heart. You know something of it, but it is needful that you should know more. For the more we know of ourselves, the more we shall prize and love Jesus and His salvation.

I hope what you find in yourself by daily experience will humble you, but not discourage you: humble you it should, and I believe it does.

Are not you amazed sometimes that you should have so much as a hope, that, poor and needy as you are, the Lord thinketh of you?

But let not all you feel discourage you. For if our Physician is almighty, our disease cannot be desperate and if He casts none out that come to Him, why should you fear?

Our sins are many, but His mercies are more: our sins are great, but His righteousness is greater: we are weak, but He is power. Most of our complaints are owing to unbelief, and the remainder of a legal spirit. And these evils are not removed in a day.

Wait on the Lord, and He will enable you to see more and more of the power and grace of our High Priest. – John Newton

“His Mercy Is More”: A Letter From John Newton – Aaron Shamp

Worship with me to this timeless message of both the seriousness of our sin and the goodness of God (written by Matt Boswell and Matt Papa:

What love could remember, no wrongs we have done

Omniscient, all-knowing, He counts not their sum

Thrown into a sea without bottom or shore

Our sins they are many, His mercy is more

What patience would wait as we constantly roam

What Father so tender is calling us home

He welcomes the weakest, the vilest, the poor

Our sins they are many, His mercy is more

What riches of kindness He lavished on us

His blood was the payment His life was the cost

We stood ‘neath a debt we could never afford

Our sins they are many, His mercy is more

Chorus

Praise the Lord

His mercy is more

Stronger than darkness

New every morn’

Our sins they are many, His mercy is more*

*Lyrics to His Mercy Is More – Songwriters: Matt Boswell & Matt Papa

YouTube Video – Completely Known, Completely Loved – Matt Boswell, Matt Papa (Live from Sing!)

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Monday Morning Moment – Fathering – More Love than Discipline

August 20, 2024 admindeb Leave a comment

Yesterday, a young woman very dear to me gave a tribute to her grandfather at his memorial service. What she said was beautiful and honoring as she said goodbye (for now) to a man who loved her deeply, as she also loved him. She shared her short talk with me, and it reminded me of the precious gift of good fathering. [I’ve written several times on fathering. It’s a hard job, maybe even harder than mothering.]

Reading her talk, she spoke of a grandfather who treasured her. As a grandparent, I understand how easy it is to just love our grandchildren. The raising, training up, civilizing of children is long and arduous, but the joy of grandchildren, both little and grown, usually requires little from us. Still to have a good father as a grandparent is a great blessing. I know this young one will miss him terribly.

Being a good father is a daunting task, especially for men whose own fathers were absent or punishing (maybe from their own sense of inadequacy or pain). As women, we are allowed to cry and vent our struggles to other women. With men, the message is too often to ignore the emotions that are hard to control or to strike out in anguish when facing disappointment or failure. I can’t imagine really.

Today, I heard of Jason O. Wilson for the first time. He is a martial arts instructor but much more. For decades, he has mentored young boys (and their fathers). Scrolling through X (formerly Twitter), I came across this quote on some of his teaching:

It’s impossible to overstate how important it is for a child to hear these words from their dad:

I’m here for you.

I love you.

I’m proud of you.

Speak them as often as you can. [v/c to the incredible @mrjasonowilson. I dare you watch his videos without tearing up.]

Having grown up himself with no father in the home, he founded Cave of Adullam. That’s the name of Jason Wilson’s transformational training academy.

Cave of Adullam is identified in the Bible as a place of refuge for David. In that period of Israel’s history, King Saul was trying to kill David, but David refused to kill the King even when he had several opportunities.

Wilson’s teaching and mentoring is like nothing I’ve seen before. He teaches discipline, but his main focus is for the boys to know they are loved. Their fathers are as much a part of their training as they are.

YouTube Video: Breaking Through Emotional Barriers, The Cave of Adullam (CATTA)

If you’re a dad or grandfather and you’re reading this, you obviously are invested in fathering. It is never too late to connect with your children and grandchildren. It may be uncomfortable and even unwelcome. We live in an era of family estrangement. However, you will never regret trying or starting over, if given the opportunity. As we reach out to our children, sometimes we find our own healing in the process.

Dig into Jason Wilson’s practices. His website, books, X tweets, YouTube videos, and guest spots on podcasts are extremely helpful. He’s even been a guest on the Joe Rogan Experience where they talk together for 2 hours! Wilson’s own lack of good fathering has not stopped him from fathering and mentoring well. In fact, he was propelled into that better life because of his loss. He was not defeated by the lack of a good father. His faith in a good Heavenly Father has set a solid foundation for him, and now he comforts and empowers others.

Coming back around to the impetus for this post – the grieving granddaughter of a good grandfather – she will be comforted by the love she knew in their relationship. Her children will benefit from that as well. We take note of good fathers and have hope for ourselves to be that kind of parent.

Photo Credit: Charles Kettering, Success

Goodreads Quotes from Jason O. Wilson’s Battle Cry

Goodreads Quotes from Jason O. Wilson’s Cry Like a Man