Tag Archives: Thomas Oppong

5 Friday Faves – Beyond the Guitar’s “Spirit”, Reducing Brain Fog, Crucial Conversations, the Precious Nature of Life, and What We Have in Common

1) Beyond the Guitar’s “Spirit” – Below you will find the latest Beyond the Guitar video from the 2002 movie Spirit: the Stallion of the Cimarron. Nathan’s treatment of “Homeland” theme by masterful composer Hans Zimmer 2002 movie theme is beautiful. One of the commenters on his YouTube video stated that it was as if Zimmer composed it for guitar. Nathan’s arrangement definitely does justice to this incredibly triumphant orchestral piece. Enjoy!

2) Reducing Brain Fog – Brain fog is an inability to concentrate. It is essentially a feeling of “being in a fog” – you feel slowed-down, tired, draggy, unable to think clearly or even find the right words at times.

Photo Credit: Marcus Aurelius, Pexels

Writer and business consultant Thomas Oppong wrote this brilliant article on what we can do to reduce brain fog. He goes into great detail so be sure, if you struggle with this issue, to read his piece. He doesn’t quote from the science literature but his takes on the six points below make enormous sense. All worth a try.

  • Give up the clutter. – Decluttering bit by bit will lower stress and sharpen focus.
  • Stop the multi-tasking. – “Narrow down your most important tasks to 3, and then give one task your undivided attention for a period of time. Allow yourself to rotate between the three, giving yourself a good balance of singular focus and variety.”
  • Give up the urgent distraction. – We have our lists and our goals, but the easier and lesser things around us draw away our attention. Resisting the distractions help us stay on track.
  • Stop feeding your comfort. – Beware of the well-worn ruts in work and life. “Seeking new experiences, learning new skills, and opening the door to new ideas inspire us and educate us in a way improves mental clarity.”
  • Don’t sit still. – Plan physical activity into the day.  It helps us stay mentally fresh and focused.
  • Stop consuming media and start creating it. – Social media can rob us of our hours and energy. “Let creation determine consumption. Allow curiosity to lead you to discover and pursue something you deepy care about. Make time to create something unique. The point is to get lost in awe and wonder like you did when you were a child. When you achieve that feeling from a certain activity, keep doing it!” – Thomas Oppong

How to Overcome Brain Fog From a Long-time Sufferer – Tim Denning

3) Crucial Conversations – So many conversations don’t happen because they are just too risky. They make us feel too vulnerable. Yet we long for deep conversations. For conversations that enlarge us and bring understanding, even between people who don’t share opinions or worldviews.

Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High – Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, Al Switzler, & Laura Roppe

Top 10 Takeways From Crucial Conversations – Tabitha Bower

Last week, I listened to a Jennie Allen podcast on “life-giving conversations”.

Between the current political division and the physical distancing necessitated by COVID, we are having fewer crucial conversations. That’s not to say we aren’t on video meetings or phone calls for much of the day, but we have to work harder to have satisfying conversations.

March 2020 (BC – Before COVID mediation)

April 2020 – AC (After COVID mediation)

Certainly conversations between people who disagree are happening less. They are just too hard. Especially via screens. Especially when opportunities to talk deeply are just not there.

What got me thinking about this is a couple of podcasts (see below) and also watching (and feeling) the strain of months long requirements of video meetings with work (and church) groups…instead of in-person opportunities.

How to Have Life-Giving Conversations – Podcast – Jennie Allen

How Shame Affects All of Us – Podcast – Jennie Allen with Dr. Curt Thompson

Crucial conversations, whether one-on-one or in a group structure, are harder these days. How can we get past the superficial or the daily grind kinds of talk? I’m thinking there’s a discipline we can develop – to really dig in and want to know the person(s) in front of us and to ask questions and pose topics others can really engage with…especially if we can communicate that we are safe with each other.

“We want to be seen and known in the place we live… we want to ask questions that invite people to be curious and creative. Tell me about something this past week that was really hard for you. Caused you joy.  That caused you to be creative. Regularly take time to validate that in each other. We want to invite people to be curious and creative.” – Jennie Allen, Dr. Curt Thompson

Anything with psychiatrist and writer Dr. Curt Thompson involved is great quality content. Whether it is on belonging, vulnerability, shame, or dealing with physical/social distancing, he has a wealth of practical and neurologically sound counsel. Just watch the YouTube videos with him talking.

Thoughts?

4) The Precious Nature of Life – What we think on this has divided our nation – those more for life from conception and those more for the rights of the conceiving adults.

As a mother and grandmother who has lost all but one of her cherished older relatives, I want to celebrate the precious nature of life. I want to invite you to celebrate as well.

We never know when we will be gone from here or when those we love will be either. We just never know. Thus, the imperative to not let anything stand in our way of loving…or at least honoring the lives of those in our own.

Why this for a Friday Fave?

The 21 y/o son of friends of ours died this week. The whole wrong gone of this dear young man has stopped us all in our tracks. God’s grace holds people up…as does His grace with clothes on, friends and other family, leaning in to love. His passing has been very much on my mind, and his parents on my heart.

Canadian author Tim Challies also lost his son, Nick, recently…also suddenly. 20 years old. We are thankful that the Challies family has a huge circle of support, too. He has been writing about their loss of Nick in a series of blogs. Here is one: The Cruelty of Quarantine: A Lament.

If you could use some help with your own grief, walk with Tim through his.

Cherish these loved ones we’re privileged to have in our lives. In all their scruffiness, various differences, political activism or not…they are gifts to us. We don’t throw them back. We figure out how to love them and be there for them…and hopefully, they do the same for us.

Right?

COVID (and its mediation) is putting incredible stress on our lives and relationships. Important to keep our eyes and minds clear on the precious nature of life…not just ours, but each others, of course.

5) What We Have in Common – When there are rifts (political or familial) or a growing discontent (in a relationship or at work) or a vain sense that life could be better with someone else, it’s good to give pause to that thinking, and consider: What do we have in common with each other? What might we be giving up that we may not see in the every day but that, once out the door, we may miss and regret the decision?

Photo Credit: Wikipedia

Think of the person(s) you’re may be having difficulty with. Now, come up with what you have in common, make as long a list as possible. Be creative.

I’m thinking…ok, here goes:

  • We share the same core values.
  • We care about the world we’re leaving to our children.
  • We both want to be successful, but also to be effective.
  • We’ve both lost a parent (or two).
  • We are both American (fill in your country) and we care about our country.
  • We’ve both been to the doctor way too many times this year.
  • We both struggle with insecurity, although it surfaces differently.
  • We both have trouble talking with each other about these things.
  • Yet, we both know we are a part of a greater story.

Can we take the things we have in common and move toward each other instead of more apart?

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Just a few thoughts that didn’t get laid down until after a busy, lovely weekend. Hope the rest of your week is peaceful and full of good.

Bonuses:

How to Overcome the 5 D’s of Leadership and Life: Doubt, Distortion, Discouragement, Distraction, and Division – Carey Nieuwhof Leadership Podcast – with Guest Jon Gordon (Podcast & Transcript)

The Curse of the Honeycrisp Apple – Deena Shanker and Lydia Mulvany

Fall Leaves in All Their Glory (Before the Rains Came)

5 Friday Faves – Political Signage, the late Summer Garden, Fall, the Number 2 Guys, and Holding Space

Weekend! Welcome. Hopefully only the happiest of screens beckon you.  Also hopefully the weather allows for time outside on this beautiful Fallish (here) couple of days. Thanks for stopping by.

1) Political Signage – We have never put up signs in our yard supporting one candidate or another. I actually admire those with the courage or passion to do so. Even when their signs are for folks I’d rather not win. About once a week, now that we are just weeks away from the big election in November, I drive around our neighborhood to see who is for who.

The most unique and funniest sign was the one below. Yes, please!

The best political Tweet I’ve discovered so far is this one. Not a sign… but maybe a sign of the times. We have to get to the place that we say “No more hate!” Whoever wins the election, we will get through it…together. If we’re willing not to sacrifice relationship in our differences.

Photo Credit: Malachi O’Brien, Twitter

2) The Late Summer Garden – Some of the flowers are gone, but the begonias, zinnias, and a few others continue to raise their beauty to the sky. Such a blessing…even when they look a little tired…it doesn’t take away from the glory of their summer, even in COVID 2020.

The hydrangeas have bloomed and bloomed and bloomed. Below, the beautiful late summer bloom ravaged by the elements and a brand new bloom on the same bush.

The vegetables almost spent…last pickings of summer:

…and finally the acorns, treated as treasure by the grands visiting.

3) Fall– My favorite season of the year…The leaves are changing color yet but the temperatures are finally falling. Can’t wait! Just a few photos from RVA Antiques:

4) The Number 2 Guys –  Some of us have that special gifting of being the Number 2 guy. Rarely on the podium or in front of the room but all about helping the Number 1 guy be as effective as possible. Here is a great example of how that works.

We have cable TV to watch the Tour de France bike race and NFL football. Because of COVID, the Tour de France 2020 was delayed this year until the end of August, and it wraps up this weekend.

Photo Credit: Wikipedia

My husband is a cycling enthusiast and we watch the Tour every year. This year we were a bit out of sync so just got the last few days. It looks like the Dutch cycling team Jumbo-Visma will win the Tour this year with Slovenian rider Primož Roglič coming in first.

How Does a Tour de France Team Work? – Louis Bien

Roglič is a champion among champions in this race. Where does his edge come from? Every team in the Tour has several world class riders. Either sprinters or climbers. They all help each other. One member of the team is designated to win, and there is usually 1 rider in particular who serves as the super domestique. His job is to set the pace for the team (various riders take turns at this, but 1 or 2 riders usually lead). He also protects the rider picked to win and strategizes with the team how to make that win possible, from stage to stage of the race.

26 year-old American Sepp Kuss is definitely the Number 2 guy for the Jumbo-Visma team and for fellow teammate Primož Roglič, in particular. Kuss is a climber. For some teams, the #2’s who help the lead rider keep him upfront for as long as they can and then they themselves burn out and end up in the middle or rear of the peloton toasted. Kuss has the legs and the tenacity to “pull him (Roglič) right up there and just hang in there with him” (my husband’s take on him this Number 2).

Photo Credit: Sepp Kuss, Wikimedia

Meet Sepp Kuss, The American Cyclist Helping This Year’s Tour de France Leader – Peggy Shinn

I loved Andrew Hood’s take on Kuss’s contentment with being #2 when he has the ability to be in the lead: “Kuss is content to work in the shadows of his teammates right now. But if he keeps ripping the legs off the peloton, he’ll end up at the front sooner or later.”

Power Analysis: Super Domestique Sepp Kuss on the Col de la Loze – Giancarlo Bianchi

Who’s your #2? Or maybe you’re the Number 2. Essential to the win!

[Postscript: After 11 days in the yellow jersey, Primož Roglič lost the Tour de France after the individual time trials (Stage 20 of the race) to friend and fellow Slovenian Tadej Pogacar. It was a colossal surprise to everyone and especially to Pogacar. At just shy of 22 years old, he held onto the white jersey for Best Young Rider. Also the King of the Mountain polka-dot jersey for his powerful mountain climbs. Lastly, the prized yellow jersey for best over all. The winner of this year’s Tour de France. His response: gratitude for his team.]

5) Holding Space – So thankful to see people responding to a tragedy with courage, reason, and real honor.

Andre Conley – Say his name. Two weeks into his senior year at Patrick Henry High School, Minneapolis, Andre was killed, earlier this week, while knocking on doors, passing out fliers for a Republican Congressional candidate. Killed. Another young man with him, Andre Kelley, was wounded and hospitalized. The story is here.

One of the N. Minneapolis high school principals, Mauri Melander Friestleben, spoke out against the violence on the streets of Minneapolis. She stood with dozens of other principals, “holding space” for change for students, staff, and the families of Minneapolis. We can all learn from her…to hold space for what’s right in our own communities…and to stand against what’s wrong (you might be surprised by it).

A GoFundMe  was initiated for Andre Conley’s family. To show you the quality of Andre’s family: they asked for the money to go to Andre Kelley and his family to cover his hospitalization and other expenses. Praying for Andre Kelley and for comfort for Andre Conley’s family, schoolmates, and teachers/friends.

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Bonuses:

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Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg – 1933-2020

Ginsburg and Scalia: ‘Best Buddies’

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If You’re Already Dreading Winter, Here are Some Small Ways to Prepare Now – Rachel Miller

Active Listening Lessons From FBI Negotiators That Will Get You What You Want – Thomas Oppong

5 Habits that Will Help Your Brain Stay in Peak Condition – Thomas Oppong

When some good neighbor friends wanted to help us celebrate Dave’s birthday, physically distanced, she asked what sort of a dessert he would like. I told her that he was actually trying not to eat sweets. She put together this incredible little snack display with “cheese” cake. Smoked Gouda to be exact.

Quote:

“Whenever I feel bad, I go to the library and read controversial periodicals. Though I do not know whether I am a liberal or a conservative, I am nevertheless enlivened by the hatred which one bears for the other. In fact, this hatred strikes me as one of the few signs of life remaining in the world. This is another thing about the world which is upside-down: all the friendly and likable people seem dead to me; only the haters seem alive.” – from the Walter Percey’s novel The Moviegoer – featured in Russell Moore‘s article Why Unhealthy People Crave Controversy

This is kudzu – it is an invasive vine that grows all summer and covers everything. Interesting story of how it ended up in the US and in the South.

Respect Your Elders – a classic Robert Duval movie scene:

My grandmother once gave me a tip:
In difficult times, you move forward in small steps.
Do what you have to do, but little by little.
Don’t think about the future, or what may happen tomorrow.
Wash the dishes.
Remove the dust.
Write a letter.
Make a soup.
You see?
You are advancing step by step.
Take a step and stop.
Rest a little.
Praise yourself.
Take another step.
Then another.
You won’t notice, but your steps will grow more and more.
And the time will come when you can think about the future without crying.
– Elena Mikhalkova(Image of Tasha Tudor, American Illustrator 1915-2008)