The state of contentment is on my mind this morning. From time to time, I’m moved to check my heart in this area, because being content can be a struggle. Contentment is NOT the same as resignation. In fact, it is far from it. Contentment can be defined as “the state of being mentally or emotionally satisfied with things as they are.”
During a season of emotional and spiritual discontent decades ago (which I wrote about here), my sweet husband introduced me to Jerry Bridges‘ book The Practice of Godliness. He had marked the chapter on contentment and gave the book to me on his way to work. Without judgment. Just love and concern. I read it right at that moment.
Bridges (now with the LORD) had this great gift of writing with such clarity and simplicity that we could soak up these truths with life-changing certainty. Thanks to Bridges’ gentle, humble writing, I didn’t take offense – “He doesn’t know what it’s like for me!” – and I learned afresh contentment in life. I am still learning.
In the book of Genesis, the very first sin of humankind was born out of discontent. Satan tempted Eve, and then Adam, with the idea that God was not good and didn’t not have their best interest in mind. His temptation wooed Eve into taking her life into her own hands, choosing to disobey God’s one command. Bridges wrote about the eroding nature of discontent in three areas – possessions, position/power, and the providence of God.
The Apostle Paul commented on how he had learned to be content in all things. He doesn’t give the secret of being content here, but in 2 Corinthians 12:9 as the foundation for his contentment.
Jerry Bridges gives the secret of living in humble and joyful contentment:
“This is the secret of being content: To learn and accept that 1) we live daily by God’s unmerited favor given through Christ, and that 2) we can respond to any and every situation by His divine enablement through the Holy Spirit.” – Jerry Bridges, AZ Quotes
If you struggle with discontent, with wanting life to be different than what it is right now, you would do well to read Jerry Bridges’ chapter on contentment. It brought me to my senses, for sure.
In honoring the impact this man has had on my life and thousands of others, I’d like to post some of his quotes. Learn from this dear brother even as he’s right now in the presence of God.
“Contentment is one of the most distinguishing traits of the Godly person, because a Godly person has his heart focused on God rather than on possessions or position or power.” – Jerry Bridges, LikeSuccess
“Your worst days are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God’s grace. And your best days are never so good that you are beyond the need of God’s grace.” – Jerry Bridges, AZ Quotes
“Lord, I am willing To receive what You give. To lack what You withhold. To relinquish what You take, To suffer what You inflict, To be what You require.” – Jerry Bridges, AZ Quotes
“Grace is never cheap. It is absolutely free to us, but infinitely expensive to God… Anyone who is prone to use grace as a license for irresponsible, sinful behavior, surely does not appreciate the infinite price God paid to give us His grace.” – Jerry Bridges, AZ Quotes
“Every day that we’re not practicing godliness we’re being conformed to the world of ungodliness around us.” – Jerry Bridges, Top Famous Quotes
“One thing we may be sure of, however: For the believer all pain has meaning; all adversity is profitable. There is no question that adversity is difficult. It usually takes us by surprise and seems to strike where we are most vulnerable. To us it often appears completely senseless and irrational, but to God none of it is either senseless or irrational. He has a purpose in every pain He brings or allows in our lives. We can be sure that in some way He intends it for our profit and His glory.” – Jerry Bridges, AZ Quotes
“Be glad in the Lord, and rejoice, O righteous, and shout for joy, all you upright in heart!” – Psalm 32:11
“Shout for joy to God, all the earth; sing the glory of his name; give to him glorious praise!” – Psalm 66:1-2
Clap your hands, all you peoples! Shout to God with the voice of triumph! – Psalm 47:1
Come, let us sing for joy to the LORD; let us shout to the Rock of our salvation! Let us enter His presence with thanksgiving; let us make a joyful noise to Him in song. – Psalm 95:1-2
Make a joyful noise to the LORD, all the earth; break forth—let your cry ring out, and sing praises! Sing praises to the LORD with the lyre, in melodious song with the harp. With trumpets and the blast of the ram’s horn shout for joy before the LORD, the King. – Psalm 98:4-6
In the Fall of 1998, we returned to the US from living overseas for three years. It was a bit of a sabbatical where we had a few weeks to reconnect with friends and family. For that period of time, we traveled around the US, visiting folks. On Sundays, we would go to their churches.
Oddly, every Sunday (or the majority of them), the same song was on that church’s worship list. A song released in 1994 in Australia by composer, worship leader Darlene Zschech. This song would put the then 10-year-old Hillsong Church on the global worship map.
Our kids were still youngsters in 1998 but remember well how we stood gathered with other believers and sang that glorious anthem to the Lord – week after week. Amused at times, we puzzled over how many times we ended up singing it. That song and those worship experiences would bring me (at least) to tears in those moments. In awe of Jesus…and His provision for His beloved.
We don’t sing this song much anymore, now over 30 years since its release. However, its call to worship is still real and relevant. Yesterday, I found Australian pastor/teacher Robert Griffith‘s piece on shouting to the Lord. He writes that there are 135 references in Scripture referring to our shouting to the Lord. His observations are powerful and transformative, some quoted below.
Now, all of us shout. If we have voices, we have all shouted many times, and for numerous reasons. We’ve shouted in the overflow of great joy. We’ve shouted in the exultation of victory. We’ve shouted in the tension of competition. We’ve shouted in the chaos of battle. We’ve shouted in the tumult of controversy and argument. We’ve shouted in moments of great danger. We’ve shouted in the explosion of hot anger.
But we rarely shout alone. Have you noticed that? Similar to laughing, and to some extent singing, shouting seems to be designed primarily as a corporate expression of strong emotion, something we find most enjoyable or helpful or needful when we do it with other people.
There’s something profound and mysterious about a group of people sharing a common excitement and joy. Often, joy is heightened when we experience it together with others – and certain joys are only properly expressed in shouting. To not shout together in the stadium as your team crosses the line to score, would emotionally mute the whole experience.
Most of the scriptural instructions to shout are addressed to the gathered saints – the Psalms were mainly meant to be sung (and sometimes shouted) together with others.
What about when our Church gathers together to worship (and it’s not a funeral)? What does our Church culture encourage? Are there occasionally moments of exuberance in song where all the saints “shout for joy to God” (Psalm 66:1)? Or does that always feel out of place, or only done by one or two courageous (and odd) people?
Do we ever feel the realities of the mercies of God, our redemption, the spiritual conflict we’re engaged in, the promise of our resurrection, and Christ’s ultimate triumph strongly enough to inspire a shout? I ask this question for a couple of reasons. One, it might reveal a personal deficiency in our souls that we need to address with the Lord – that we’re not connecting deeply enough with the realities of what God has done for us, and what God has promised us. And, of course, that’s all of us to a greater or lesser degree. What we may need is to repent of giving excessive attention to lesser things and spend more extended time meditating on “the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:8) in order to stoke the embers of our deep passion for Him. Without passion, nobody is going to shout.
But a second reason is that, to some degree, an affectional deficit might be due to the fact that we don’t shout together. I often feel certain great truths of God, or at least dimensions of them, more deeply and intensely when I share and shout over them with others.
Shouting is commended and commanded in the Bible, like singing, because there are dimensions of joy in God that are only experienced when we express ourselves in this way – particularly when we express ourselves this way together as the people of God.
Because of the clear biblical exhortations to shout, I commend these thoughts to you for your prayerful consideration – especially pastors and leaders who craft worship times for gathered saints. What we all want is for the saints to experience as much blessing of delighting in God as possible.” – Shout to the Lord – Robert Griffith
Let’s make some noise! Our church when gathered is definitely Spirit-filled but, at the same time, somewhat reserved. I do sense a movement stirring…may we voice our delight in the Lord in ways that honor Him.
My Jesus, my Savior Lord, there is none like You All of my days I want to praise The wonders of Your mighty love
My comfort, my shelter Tower of refuge and strength Let every breath, all that I am Never cease to worship You
Shout to the Lord, all the earth, let us sing Power and majesty, praise to the King Mountains bow down and the seas will roar At the sound of Your name
I sing for joy at the work of Your hands Forever I’ll love You, forever I’ll stand Nothing compares to the promise I have in You
(My Jesus) To my Savior (my Savior) Oh, Lord there is nothing like You All of my days I want to praise The wonders of Your mighty love
You’re my comfort (my comfort), and my shelter, yes (my shelter) You’re my tower of refuge and strength Let every breath, and all that I am Never cease to worship You
Shout to the Lord, all the earth, let us sing Power and majesty, praise to the King Mountains bow down and the seas will roar At the sound of Your name
I sing for joy at the work of Your hands Forever I’ll love You, forever I’ll stand Nothing compares to the promise I have in…
Shout to the Lord, all the earth, let us sing, yeah Power and majesty, praise to the King Mountains bow down (mountains bow down and the seas will roar) At the sound of Your name
I sing for joy at the work of Your hands Forever I’ll love You, forever I’ll stand Nothing compares to the promise I have in You (Nothing compares to the promise I have in You…) Oh, nothing compares to the promise I have in You*
Yesterday, I was taking a break and scrolled through Instagram until it stopped me in my tracks on how complaining can have a chronic negative impact on our health, and, in particular, on our brain. That didn’t surprise me, but I wanted to look further to test out what this influencer was reporting. You can look, too. Do an internet search on “complaining, cortisol, and the brain”. It is startling, but, again, not surprising.
Complaining is extraordinarily detrimental to brain health. In a way, it is also like “second-hand smoke” to those with whom you share it. When we complain, our brain responds by releasing cortisol. We need cortisol, the “stress” hormone, to alert us to possible danger and to stimulate an appropriate (hopefully) response to that danger. The problem with complaining is that it puts stress on a loud speaker when there was no need. Similar to how trauma rewires our brain to expect more trauma.
Venting feels good at the moment. It releases the internal pressure that is mentally building up from negative thinking. The dilemma with venting is two-fold – 1) it cements the wiring in the brain in the direction of negative, hopeless thinking, and 2) it activates/re-activates the same process in the caring hearer. Mind you, there is a positive, healthy venting that can take place if it is focused toward hopeful problem-solving and change. This can be life-giving to both persons.
[Side note: We need each other. We were made for community. Talking something out with people who love us is hugely important. There is a difference in lament and grumbling, or complaining and and acknowledging a hard thing, seeking help for forward movement.]
As one who is getting older and feeling the memory not as sharp and the tendency toward that “cup half empty”, curmudgeonly take on things…I wonder: when and how did it start?
When does analytical become contrarian? When does hopeful turn into doubtful? When does grateful turn into grumbly?
Do we just allow ourselves to turn into different people? Or do we take steps to stay (or become) joyful, engaged, unstoppable humans? People who others love to work with, serve with, spend time with.
A little over a year ago I wrote a blog on how complaining rewires our brains. If you know complaining is a struggle, please take the time to read this one piece (linked below). We may try to eat healthy, exercise, and rest aplenty – maybe there is one more thing we should consider:
Bottom line: Practice gratitude. Pause your thought process. Resist the urge to complain, rather reframing the complaint into positive action. Surround yourself with people who don’t complain, and, even make you laugh sometimes.
When you have more time or you want to consider steps toward positive brain health and a kinder, gentler handling of your life and circumstances, I have excerpted these from my other blogs on complaining and negative thinking:
Complaining Exposed – [From the Archives] When it comes to complaining, we all think of someone else who does it…not us. It is an irritating habit, and it only gets worse if unchecked. Poet writer Anne Peterson talks about complaining and how it flows out of 6 heart attitudes. Complaining reveals that:
We feel entitled.
We are impatient.
We hold on to resentment.
We compare ourselves to others.
We don’t think life is fair.
We are conformed to this world/culture.
Read her article for the particulars. Be prepared to rip the Bandaid (excuses) off your complaining.
Entrepreneur Gary Vaynerchukwrites about how his mom and wife seem to be incapable of complaining and it’s one of the things he loves about them: “Complaining has zero value. Looking at the negative, seeing the glass as half empty, and complaining are some of the biggest wastes of time a human being can engage in. Instead, tackle the problem head on. Assess it, see what you can do about it, and then do just that. ‘Woe is me’ is truly one of the biggest things that can stand in the way of success both professionally and personally.”
2. Beyond Grumpiness –[From the Archives] A friend of mine pointed this blog to me today and it bumped its way to the top of my Faves. English professor Alan Jacobs mused about the grumpiness of old people. I don’t know when it happens and why exactly it happens, but it is something that has happened to me of late…and I don’t think I’m old enough yet for it to happen.
Here’s a bit of what Dr. Jacobs says about grumpiness, but you should read his whole piece, especially if you’re finding yourself becoming grumpy (whatever age you are).
“I think the explanation for such widespread grumpiness is fairly simple…It’s not the big foul acts or horribly cruel words that do you in, it’s the slow drip drip drip of little annoyances that become over time a vast sea of frustration. Surely you’ve been there? You become exasperated by someone’s passing comment and when they are genuinely puzzled by your anger over so trivial a matter, you try to explain (apologetically, penitently, I hope) that it wouldn’t be a problem if this thing had happened once but it has happened a thousand times. It’s the repetition that kills you.” [Dr. Jacobs goes on to talk about the divisions on which we’ve taken sides give the sense of being new and revolutionary…and yet they are old divisions revisited.] “You can’t learn from the past if you don’t know what happened in it. So yeah, I’m gradually turning into a grumpy old man. Because nobody learns anything…” [About these things that divide us: We seem to care too much, or too little, or just plain not at all. Dr. Jacobs challenges us that only being truly loving people gives us the right to voice an opinion, and definitely not a shaming one.] “It’s a hard path to walk, this Way of avoiding both indifference and ‘the conscious impotence of rage at human folly.’ But the hard path is the only real Way. (All the others circle back on themselves.) So I try every day to follow it. I don’t think I could manage even that if I did not have an Advocate to accompany me, to encourage me, and to guide me.” – Alan Jacobs, Beyond Grumpiness
3. Without Grumbling – [From the Archives] Which comes first – anger or grumbling? Or is it a more subtle but growing discontent? When does occasional complaining settle into a set habit of grumbling? What does grumbling communicate to our own minds and to others within hearing?
I’ve written plenty on complaining, grumbling, and negative thinking (see links below). It can absolutely change the wiring in our brains. In my younger years, I always looked for the good and the beautiful in a person/situation…and I found it. Now, as an older person, my temptation is more toward darker thinking. This is NOT where I want to stay.
Below is a beautiful bit of writer Trevin Wax‘s post on grumbling and joy (it is geared toward Christians but there is wisdom for all of life here).
“In Philippians 2:6–11, Paul commands the church to adopt the same mind of our risen Lord. And his first command is, “Don’t grumble.”
“Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world.” (Philippians 2:14–15)
Why start with grumbling? We might expect an exhortation to spiritual disciplines, or strategies for thriving as pure and faultless people in a sinful world. And yes, Paul does speak about blamelessness and purity and holding firm to the word of life (Philippians 2:16). But this purity in action is somehow connected to the first command to do everything without grumbling. Somehow, grumbling will keep us from faithfulness.
Why start here? Because Paul knows the story of Israel.
Remember the children of Israel? They chose grumbling over gratitude. Grumbling stalled their journey and led to actions that were anything but “blameless and innocent.”
Whether we are given suffering, chains, imprisonment, or worse (Hebrews 11:36–38), or whether we conquer kingdoms, stop the mouths of lions, escape the sword, and put armies to flight (Hebrews 11:33–34), we must know that only joy in and gratitude to Jesus will win the war for our culture…Yes, we may face obstacles, setbacks, and tough days ahead. But in it all, and under it all, we are also joyful. And this cheerful courage comes not from ignoring darkness or looking only for the bright side, but from believing that the Light will overcome the dark.
Do you want to shine like stars? Then do everything without grumbling.” –
4.Breaking Out of Negative Thinking – [From the Archives] I first wrote about negative thinking six years ago (that blog linked below). Since then we have come through COVID 2020, great racial unrest and social upheaval, contentious election cycles, ongoing wars, and a downturn in our economy. Lots to think negatively about with good reason, but if we’re not careful we will begin gearing our thinking in that direction to the detriment of our mental and relational health.
The team at Daily Health Post focused on complaining as a culprit that can actually cause our brains to default to anxiety and depression. From experience, I know this is true.
They prescribe the following to flip the damaging habit of complaining:
“Be grateful: Find something to be grateful for everyday. If you keep a journal, write down 3 things you are grateful for every morning and every night.
If you start to feel anxious or pessimistic, pause a minute and write them down again. If it’s too hard, write down 5 or even 10 new things you’re grateful for. By the end of the exercise, you’ll feel much happier and fulfilled.
Catch yourself: Don’t wait for your friends or family to tell you you’re complaining, pay attention to your thoughts and words.
If you’re complaining, quickly shift your energy to find solutions and lessons to be learned. Afterwards, treat yourself will a nice cup of tea for the effort!
Change your mood: If you feel overwhelmed and negative, remove yourself from whatever you’re doing and shift your state of mind. If you’re home, sit down with your favorite book and cook up a tasty treat. If you’re at work, go to the washroom or break room for a few minutes and listen your favorite song.
Breathe deeply and close your eyes, paying attention to every word. Hold onto that relaxing feeling and carry it with you throughout the day.
Practice wise effort: Wise effort is the practice of letting go of anything that doesn’t serve you. If your worry won’t improve your situation or teach you a lesson, simply let it go and move on.
This is much easier said then done, of course, but if you write it out, ask friends for advice, and take some time to think it through constructively, it really can be done.“
Jesus returned to the Mount of Olives,but early the next morning he was back again at the Temple. A crowd soon gathered, and he sat down and taught them.As he was speaking, the teachers of religious law and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in the act of adultery. They put her in front of the crowd.
“Teacher,” they said to Jesus, “this woman was caught in the act of adultery.The law of Moses says to stone her. What do you say?”
They were trying to trap him into saying something they could use against him, but Jesus stooped down and wrote in the dust with his finger.They kept demanding an answer, so he stood up again and said, “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!”Then he stooped down again and wrote in the dust.
When the accusers heard this, they slipped away one by one, beginning with the oldest, until only Jesus was left in the middle of the crowd with the woman.Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?”
“No, Lord,” she said.
And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.”– John 8:1-11
Two others, who were criminals, were led away to be put to death with [Jesus].And when they came to the place that is called The Skull, there they crucified him, and the criminals, one on his right and one on his left.And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”
One of the criminals who were hanged railed at him, saying, “Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!”But the other rebuked him, saying, “Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation?And we indeed justly, for we are receiving the due reward of our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.”And he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.”And he said to him, “Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in paradise.” – Luke 23:32-34, 39-43
The Bible is filled with accounts of people in desperate situations. Too many alone in circumstances they can’t seem to escape. Maybe some of us have known that kind of isolation, self-hatred, hopelessness. Singer, songwriter Matthew West brings these people, these lost and wounded ones, into the light. Into the light of God’s love…and ours, if we don’t turn away. “Mended” is West’s speaking forth the Gospel of Christ over brokenness…as if Jesus is speaking to the wounded one, through the lyrics of the song.
[Chorus] When you see broken beyond repair I see healing beyond belief When you see too far gone I see one step away from home When you see nothing but damaged goods I see something good in the making I’m not finished yet When you see wounded, I see mended
[Verse 1] How many times can one heart break? It was never supposed to be this way Look in the mirror, but you find someone You never thought you’d be Oh, but I can still recognize The one I love in your tear stained eyes I know you might not see him now So lift your eyes to me
[Chorus] When you see broken beyond repair I see healing beyond belief When you see too far gone I see one step away from home When you see nothing but damaged goods I see something good in the making I’m not finished yet When you see wounded, I see mended
[Verse 2] You see your worst mistake But I see the price I paid And there’s nothing you could ever do To lose what grace has won So hold on, it’s not the end No, this is where love’s work begins I’m making all things new And I will make a miracle of you
[Chorus] When you see broken beyond repair I see healing beyond belief When you see too far gone I see one step away from home When you see nothing but damaged goods I see something good in the making I’m not finished yet When you see wounded, I see mended
[Bridge] I see my child, my beloved The new creation you’re becoming You see the scars from when you fell But I see the stories they will tell You see worthless, but I see priceless You see pain, but I see a purpose You see unworthy, undeserving But I see you through eyes of mercy
[Chorus] When you see broken beyond repair I see healing beyond belief You’re not too far gone You’re one step away from home When you see nothing but damaged goods I see something good in the making I’m not finished yet, no When you see wounded, I see mended
[Outro] Oh, I see mended Woah, oh I see mended I’m not finished yet When you see wounded, I see mended*
In closing, I’d like to shine a light on a young Christian man who is shining light on persons broken by addiction in the Kensington area of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Mal Love is a filmmaker and he is capturing stories of these people, on the streets, prisoners of their addictions. He brings a Godly dignity to them and shows genuine care for them. Talking to them, filming their stories, asking what they need and doing what he can to provide (food, beverages, pillows, recovery helps). He has even administered Narcan when encountering someone who’d overdosed. You can see and hear these stories every day as he goes out onto the streets – on Instagram, Facebook, or his YouTube channel. Mal gives us the opportunity to look into faces of people Jesus loves and pray for them. Whew!
OK…so I’ve written loads on kindness. What is it about this quality of kindness? Maybe it doesn’t seem extraordinary, and, well, it shouldn’t be. I still marvel any time I’m on the receiving end…or see someone exhibit kindness to others, not expecting a thing in return.
Kindness has a “tip of the iceberg” character about it. What’s underneath can be any number of other winsome qualities: humility, compassion, love, understanding, empathy. We’re talking about the kindness that has no underlying selfish motivations – only to lighten the load of another or to lift the heart. To show up, be present, draw near. We should never take kindness for granted. It is no small thing. We can also do the work of maturing it in our own lives. Kindness takes effort. Like the iceberg, much that drives kindness is out of our view, and reflecting on that reminds us of its great value. Kindness is way beyond just being nice. It’s extraordinary.
For example, about ten days ago a friend of ours from church had a big heart surgery. A few days after his surgery, I posted my blog on my own cardiac journey (which at this point is way small compared to his). His wife saw my blog and told him about it. He called me straightaway to ask how I was doing and to encourage me!!! That’s extraordinary kindness. Then yesterday, less than two weeks after his surgery, he was in the parking lot of our church, helping young families park and head safely into church. He could have easily stood or sat in the church lobby and everyone would have been thrilled just to see him back at church. It is his nature to serve and show kindness. I’m pretty sure, some of the folks he helped didn’t even know he’d had surgery.
Kindness does have its own rewards – physically, spiritually, mentally, and socially.
What makes it the most precious is that genuine kindness has no ulterior motive. It flows out of a pure heart. As Christians, we are taught to do good, to show kindness, to others, not for any show of our own virtue but to point to the goodness of God.
This:
“You are the salt of the earth…You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.” – Jesus, Matthew 5:13-16
Not this:
“Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them.“ – Jesus – Matthew 6:1a
Seeing our friend yesterday, serving with delight after major surgery, caused me to reflect on times I’ve seen other beautiful displays of kindness. Like when our neighbor came to sit with Dave while I was having surgery. She just showed up for him so he wouldn’t be waiting alone. That meant a lot. Or another neighbor who always remembers the birthdays of the children in our neighborhood, and even those not in our neighborhood, like my grandkids. Or the card sent for no other reason except the sender was just being kind. Or the phone call from one of the kids – just checking on us.
In the Christian faith, kindness is a fruit of the Spirit. What that means is we can actually build capacity for kindness by walking with God. He empowers us to be kind.
Whether one is a Christ-follower or not, kindness is still a character trait we can build, and we can teach it to our children. It is worth the effort.
We hear much about being kind today. We have it in us to take steps in this direction every day. Even with those we don’t think deserve it. Maybe we didn’t deserve it when people chose to be kind to us. I certainly haven’t deserved all the kindness shown to me. Something to think about and intentionally lean into.
“Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God’s kindness. Kindness in your face. Kindness in your eyes. Kindness in your smile.” – Mother Teresa
1) Beyond the Guitar’s “Superman” – John Murphy composed the stunning soundtrack for the 2025 big-screen edition of “Superman”. His treatment of the iconic theme (originally composed by John Williams) is absolutely gorgeous. Listen to his version of “Raising the Flag”here.
Then…sit back and listen to Nathan Mills at Beyond the Guitar perform his arrangement of this incredible theme on classical guitar. One instrument. Played with the heart and skill of a musician who does beautiful justice to a magnificent orchestral piece of work. So good!
2) Rachel Haack on Hope in Family Estrangement – Whether we are in the midst of a family estrangement or we know someone estranged from family members, it’s safe to say that none of us are untouched by family estrangement. It seems a part, an accepted part of our culture today. I just saw the Instagram reel below on therapist Rachel Haack’s page. It gave me hope – hearing sanity in what feels like a crazy hard relational world.
[Rachel Haack and her family – 5 girls and her husband – Facebook]
Instagram – Reel describing Rachel Haack’s bold prescription to replace the family member descriptors of “emotionally immature, boomer, toxic, dehumanizaion” with the actions/goals of “respect, compassion, understanding, and collaboration”.
Setting boundaries in painful relationships may feel like a necessary safety maneuver, but too often those boundaries become deadends. No way forward really and the years go by. I so appreciate Haack’s measured and gentle approach to reconciliation in difficult family situations. Below are excellent resources, including one podcast with Joshua Coleman, author of Rules of Estrangement: Why Adult Children Cut Ties and How to Heal the Conflict.
3) lluminators – How to Know a Person – I bought this book “How to Know a Person” after reading author David Brooks‘ guest blog on Ann Voskamp‘s website (linked below).
I’m not sure if it was after the 9/11 attacks or exactly when the cultural phenomenon began, but people seem not to look in people’s faces so much. There’s a disinterest, or lack of curiosity, or maybe even guarding. We feel it might be intrusive to ask questions, and for sure there are unhelpful questions. However, to be truly curious about someone, to want to know someone deeply, is a beautiful and honoring thing.
Below you will find two quotes from Brooks’ book. In the blog above and the book as well, he talks about being illuminators. Shining a light on someone. Not in an negative, exposing way but in a way that draws out who they really are and how amazing they are.
“When you’re practicing Illuminationism, you’re offering a gaze that says, “I want to get to know you and be known by you.” It’s a gaze that positively answers the question everybody is unconsciously asking themselves when they meet you: “Am I a person to you? Do you care about me? Am I a priority for you?” The answers to those questions are conveyed in your gaze before they are conveyed by your words. It’s a gaze that radiates respect. It’s a gaze that says that every person I meet is unique, unrepeatable, and, yes, superior to me in some way. Every person I meet is fascinating on some topic. If I approach you in this respectful way, I’ll know that you are not a puzzle that can be solved but a mystery that can never be gotten to the bottom of. I’ll do you the honor of suspending judgment and letting you be as you are.” – How To Know a Person – The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen – David Brooks
“The real act of, say, building a friendship or creating a community involves performing a series of small, concrete social actions well: disagreeing without poisoning the relationship; revealing vulnerability at the appropriate pace; being a good listener; knowing how to end a conversation gracefully; knowing how to ask for and offer forgiveness; knowing how to let someone down without breaking their heart; knowing how to sit with someone who is suffering; knowing how to host a gathering where everyone feels embraced; knowing how to see things from another’s point of view.” – How To Know a Person – The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen – David Brooks
Brooks talks about being a witness, about giving attention. I love that!
He reminds me of psychiatrist Curt Thompson MD who writes and often talks about compassion and curiosity. I’ve written lots about Curt and his wisdom on mental and relational health. He, like David Brooks, encourages us to give our attention to those around us. It’s part of the beauty of life.
4) 30 Habits with Massive Returns in Life – I’m all about habit formation. Not saying I’m great at developing healthy habits, but I love the science of habits including New Year’s resolutions. Author Justin Whitmel Earley has written two excellent books on habit formation and a third for children (on sibling relationships) entitled TheBig Mess. Earley’s websites (The Common Rule and Habits of the Household) have great free resources as well on habit formation. For today’s Friday Fave, I’m just posting this little graphic on 30 habits with big returns…how many have you already formed? It’s not a race though…choose a habit and begin there.
5) 45 Life Lessons – Here is another list, not of habits but life lessons. They are written by author and cancer survivor Regina Brett of the Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio, and have been widely reprinted.
“To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most requested column I’ve ever written.
Here is the column once more:
1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short – enjoy it.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don’t have to win every argument. Stay true to yourself.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye, but don’t worry, God never blinks.
16.. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful. Clutter weighs you down in many ways.
18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
19.. It’s never too late to be happy. But it’s all up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ‘In five years, will this matter?’
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.
35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative of dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. Accept what you already have, not what you need.
42. The best is yet to come…
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.” – Facebook
Post in Comments any lessons that you particularly appreciate.
Instagram – Reel – Jonathan Haidt on slow Dopamine – holding off social media – see his caption screenshot below. [Also below is the full podcast on this topic – Dr. Haidt starts at 8:14.]
Celebrities acting like average Joes, a wholesome thread 🧵
1. The fact that a random couple ran into Keanu Reeves in a hotel lobby, invited him to their wedding, and he put on a suit and joined is proof he really is The One. pic.twitter.com/a3DGRDiC70
Yet they did not obey or incline their ear, but walked in their own counsels and in the stubbornness of their evil heart, and went backward and not forward. – Jeremiah 7:24
“They are darkened in their understanding and alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart.” – Ephesians 4:18
For this reason we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away from it. – Hebrews 2:1
“Blessed is the one who always trembles before God, but whoever hardens their heart falls into trouble.” – Proverbs 28:14
Unbelief is a dangerous state of being. Rather than take a disturbing or confusing situation, and dig into prayer, Bible study, and reasoning with other believers…we are tempted to take our own counsel. We are drawn to a lesser gospel which “allows” for us to come out on top or to be right and the other is wrong. We want to be comfortable, justified, without sin.
Recently, we were blessed to be in a long conversation with a young family member who is struggling with a theological matter. He has studied long on this issue and can’t wrap his mind around it. Is that unbelief? I don’t think so. His heart is earnest toward the Lord. He wants to know what is true, and he wants to believe what God is saying. As we grapple over this, continue to study, and pray, I believe God will give him enough understanding that faith will take him the rest of the way…wherever he lands. He wants to believe and God will reveal what He needs to know.
What’s scary is those who choose unbelief as their only recourse…their only way forward in our post-Christian culture. Those, even in the church, who refuse to bend to the teaching of Christ…it’s enough to be moral, to be nice, to be ____________ (whatever our culture says is correct).
I knew a man once, a beloved brother, in the church where I grew up. He stopped coming to church after a long season of perceived faithfulness. His reason? He said he felt so burdened by what he had already learned and known about God that he didn’t want to risk being held responsible for any more knowledge of God!!!!!
Tragic.
Yet do we sometimes struggle with that ourselves? Being a part of church but having false beliefs…shutting our ears to what we hope not to have to obey. Or walking away from the church because of the same hardening of heart and refusing to believe.
“…is true Christianity only to be measured by what I believe, or also by how I live? Functional Christianity is when your confession impacts your way of life — you are functioning in accordance with your confession that Jesus is Lord. If Jesus is the reigning Lord of heaven and earth, then discipleship (true Christianity) is measured not simply by what I believe, but by how I live my life in relation to the rule of Jesus. In other words, the gospel should impact every area of my life.” – John H. Armstrong, Functional Christianity
A hardened heart has lost its desire to obey the Lord. Oh that we would never allow our hearts to be so far from Him as to not be able to hear His voice. He is always calling us back to Himself. Believe Him…trust Him…and obey. What freedom and beauty we have in this life with Him!
Worship with me to singer/songwriter Blessing Offor‘s heart-gripping call for us to believe. Not just in God’s Word but in His love as well. No matter what.
So You catch me when I fall, right? And You hear me when I call cryin’ And You fix me when I’m broke, right? And that’s all I need to know So the storm is gonna break right? And the sun is gonna start shining And everything is gonna go right And that’s all I need to know
But what if You know something I don’t? What if You will something I won’t? If You don’t give me what I want But You give me what I need Is that enough to…
Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love? Will I still Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love?
So nothing’s ever going wrong, right? And every day I’m gonna be smiling Turned my water into good wine And let the good times roll
But what if You know something I don’t? What if You will something I won’t? If You don’t give me what I want But You give me what I need Is that enough to…
Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love? Will I still Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love? Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love Will I still Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love?
Do I want You? Do I want You? Do I want You or what You can do for me? Do I love You? Do I love You? Do I love You or what You can do for me? Sometimes I don’t know But all I wanna do is
Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love (Yes, I do) Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love (All I wanna do, all I wanna do is believe) Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love (Yes, I do) Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love (Believe in Your love) Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love (Yes, I believe) Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love (I believe, I believe, I believe) Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love (In Your love, in Your love, in Your love) Believe, believe, believe, believe in Your love*
““Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!” – Mark 9:24b
“I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord; and they shall be my people, and I will be their God, for they shall return to me with their whole heart.” – Jeremiah 24:7
“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” – John 13:34-35
The Thursday before Jesus’ trial and crucifixion was the awaited celebration of Passover. In this day, we have a picture of Jesus, in all his humanity, and in all his deity. All four of the Gospels written about Jesus’ life have an account of this day’s events (Matthew 26:17-75; Mark 14; Luke 22:7-65; John 13:1-18:27).
After sunset, the Jewish people would take the Passover meal together – as families usually. They would share the Seder and remember how God protected them during the days of their slavery in Egypt.
This particular Thursday is known as Maundy Thursday. Maundy means “commanded” and also can refer to the ceremonial washing of feet. Jesus took upon himself to wash the dusty feet of his disciples, modeling for them his command to love one another (John 13:34-35).
After Jesus and his disciples finished their meal together, he would then enter the garden Gethsemane to pray. As He prayed, He wrestled with his heavenly Father over the need for him to die. “O my Father, if it is possible, let this cup [of suffering and death] pass from me.” Then, settled in his obedience, “O my Father, if this cup cannot pass away from me unless I drink it, Your will be done.” [Matthew 26:39; Matthew 26:42]
Sometime during that dark night of the soul, he turned his attention toward his disciples and all the rest of us, across the ages, who would follow him. His prayer to the Father, recorded in John 17, is exquisitely beautiful, especially in the context of this difficult night. [Take time to read it in full, but I’ve included a part of it below.]
“Holy Father, keep them in Your name, the name which You have given Me, that they may be one even as We are. I have given them Your word; and the world has hated them, because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. I do not ask You to take them out of the world, but to keep them from the evil one. Sanctify them in the truth; Your word is truth. As You sent Me into the world, I also have sent them into the world. “I do not ask on behalf of these alone, but for those also who believe in Me through their word; that they may all be one; even as You, Father, are in Me and I in You, that they also may be in Us, so that the world may believe that You sent Me.”
Then out of the darkness, Jesus’ disciple Judas Iscariot came to betray him. He was leading a group of the religious leaders, along with a huge company of soldiers. Although Jesus’ loyal disciples wanted to resist his arrest, Jesus refused their intervening and surrendered himself…not to the mob but to the will of the Father.
The betrayal was complete. His disciples fled (although those closest to him would soon seek out where he was being held). Jesus would spend the rest of the night in the tormenting custody of his enemies. The countdown to the cross had begun in earnest. A countdown that actually began at the Fall of humanity, and, under the careful watch of God, our Father…a countdown toward restoring us back to Himself.
After these things I looked, and behold, a great multitude which no one could count, from every nation and all tribes and peoples and tongues, standing before the throne and before the Lamb, clothed in white robes, and palm branches were in their hands; and they cry out with a loud voice, saying, “Salvation to our God who sits on the throne, and to the Lamb.” And all the angels…fell on their faces before the throne and worshiped God. – Revelation 7:9-11
“Worthy is the Lamb that was slain to receive power and riches and wisdom and might and honor and glory and blessing.” – Revelation 5:12
There appears to be nothing recorded in Scripture of events surrounding Jesus on the Wednesday before his crucifixion. Nothing. After two difficult days dealing with his enemies and accusers, it is quite possible that he took a rest. A Sabbath rest. Given the terrible nature of what was ahead of him, starting just the next day, he could surely use a day to rest and reflect. To remember how the Father had sustained him through all the strains of his public life. To refresh himself in prayer and in the company of those on earth who loved him most – his disciples, his friends, possibly his family. We know no details of that day.
Silent Wednesday.
Since we also know what is coming for Jesus…and all for our sakes…we pause today, as well, to worship. He is the perfect lamb, without blemish, perfectly fit to be offered as a sacrifice for our sins. God provided a ram for Abraham to take his son’s place in that strange and amazing sacrifice on Mt. Moriah (Genesis 22:1-14). This was a foreshadowing of our own need for a Savior. We also can be saved by the blood of “the Lamb, who takes away the sin of the world” (John 1:29).
Jesus’ life was not taken from him on that Friday, two days hence. His life was not taken. Not by the Jewish or Roman authorities. He gave his life…for us…there are no words adequate to respond…worship is all we have.
Worthy is the Lamb who was slain Holy, Holy, is He Sing a new song to Him who sits on Heaven’s Mercy Seat [Repeat 2x]
(Chorus) Holy, Holy, Holy Is the Lord God Almighty Who was, and is, and is to come With all creation I sing: Praise to the King of Kings! You are my everything, And I will adore You…! Yeah!
Clothed in rainbows, of living color Flashes of lightning, rolls of thunder Blessing and honor, strength and Glory and power be To You the Only Wise King, Yeah
(Chorus)
Filled with wonder, Awestruck wonder At the mention of Your Name Jesus, Your Name is Power Breath, and Living Water Such a marvelous mystery Yeah…
(Chorus)
Holy, Holy, Holy Is the Lord God Almighty Who was, and is, and is to come, With all creation I sing: Praise to the King of Kings! You are my everything, And – I – will – adore YOU…
(Chorus)
(Repeat a cappella)
Come up lift up His Name To the King of Kings… We will adore YOU Lord… King of heaven and earth King Jesus, King Jesus Aleluya, aleluya, aleluya! Majesty, awestruck Honor And Power and Strength and Dominion To You Lord, To the King, to King To the King of Glory
You will keep him in perfect peace, Whose mind is stayed on You, Because he trusts in You. – Isaiah 26:3
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.” – Proverbs 3:5-6
Be anxious about nothing, but in everything, by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. – Philippians 4:6-7
My word for 2025 is trust. It was a curious choice for me – Holy Spirit inspired – because I rarely use that word. However, just in the last few weeks, I’ve been diving into its meaning to the believer. Author, speaker Brennan Manning, in his book Ruthless Trust: The Ragamuffin’s Path to God has helped me understand it better.
Mid-way through the book, he proposes a single equation:
Faith + Hope = Trust.
Faith and trust are words often used interchangeably. How I see them now is this: Faith focuses on God’s character, His promises, and His power. We have faith in Him because of what He says about Himself and how we have seen Him act in history and in the lives of those around us and in our very own lives. Faith believes “He can.” Hope focuses on what’s coming in the future and how God, based on our faith and experience already, He will act. Hope is positive because we have experienced the movement of God as positive. Then trust relates to the relationship between God and me. I have faith He can do something; I have hope that He is going to do something (good), and I trust, because of His love, He will do that good thing for me. Our trust does extend to others, believing that God’s love and goodness includes others. However, trust is deeply personal and experiential. As we grow in trust, we grow in our understanding of His love. Out of that comes deep gratitude…even in our darkest of times.
The reality of naked trust is the life of the pilgrim who leaves what is nailed down, obvious, and secure, and walks into the unknown without any rational explanation to justify the decision or guarantee the future. Why? Because God has signaled the movement and offered it his presence and his promise.” ― Brennan Manning, Ruthless Trust: The Ragamuffin’s Path to God
“We are only grateful people when we can say thank you to all that has brought us to the present moment. As long as we keep dividing our lives between events and people we would like to remember and those we would rather forget, we cannot claim the fullness of our beings as a gift of God to be grateful for. Let’s not be afraid to look at everything that has brought us to where we are now and trust that we will soon see in it the guiding hand of a loving God.” ― Brennan Manning, Ruthless Trust: The Ragamuffin’s Path to God
Why is Brennan Manning lovable in the eyes of God? Because on February 8th of 1956, in a shattering, life-changing experience, I committed my life to Jesus. Does God love me because ever since I was ordained a priest in 1963, I roamed the country and lately all over the world proclaiming the Good News of the gospel of grace? Does God love me because I tithe to the poor? Does he love me because back in New Orleans I work on skid row with alcoholics, addicts, and those who suffer with AIDS? Does God love me because I spend two hours every day in prayer? If I believe that stuff I’m a Pharisee! Then I feel I’m entitled to be comfortably close to Christ because of my good works. The gospel of grace says, “Brennan, you’re lovable for one reason only—because God loves you. Period.” – Brennan Manning
[Some of my favorite books – Manning’s most famous book The Ragamuffin Gospel is loaned out.]
[The video below is 3:42 minutes of Brennan Manning’s understanding of God and His love for us. Powerful.]
Worship with me to Twila Paris‘ “Do I Trust You, Lord?”. This song came out in 1994. I remember many times sitting at the piano singing that song, with tears streaming down my cheeks…feeling His presence even in the grief of those moments…trusting Him.
Sometimes my little heart can’t understand What’s in Your will, what’s in Your plan So many times I’m tempted to ask You why But I can never forget it for long Lord, what You do could not be wrong So I believe You, even when I must cry
Chorus: Do I trust You, Lord? Does the river flow? Do I trust You, Lord? Does the north wind blow? You can see my heart You can read my mind And You got to know That I would rather die Than to lose my faith In the One I love Do I trust You, Lord? Do I trust You?
I know the answers, I’ve given them all But suddenly now, I feel so small Shaken down to the cavity in my soul I know the doctrine and theology But right now they don’t mean much to me This time there’s only one thing I’ve got to know
Chorus: Do I trust You, Lord? Does the robin sing? Do I trust You, Lord? Does it rain in spring? You can see my heart You can read my mind And You got to know That I would rather die Than to lose my faith In the One I love Do I trust You, Lord? Do I trust You?
I will trust You, Lord, when I don’t know why I will trust You, Lord, till the day I die I will trust You, Lord, when I’m blind with pain! You were God before, and You’ll never change I will trust You I will trust You I will trust You, Lord I will trust You*
Our dear brother Brennan Manning had many dark periods in his life – depression, alcoholism, terrible self-doubt. If you have read any of his books, you will see the beauty of his struggle. God was there with him in the dark. Manning wrote brilliantly and experientially about the love of God, His character and transcendence, and the persevering nature of the Trinity drawing him to Himself…through it all. Another Twila Paris song which I also sang in times of weakness and doubt reminds me of him – “The Warrior Is a Child”. Take time to play it in memory of our brother (died in 2013) and in honor of the God who sees us wherever we are and stays with us in His incomprehensible love.
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