Tag Archives: Dr. Bessel van der Kolk

Monday Morning Moment – Walled In, Dismissed, Frazzled, and Discouraged…Nevertheless

Photo Credit: Heartlight

What’s your situation? How’s your heart? What is your body holding onto? Remember when you were so full of the possibilities of life, so fresh with anticipation of what was ahead, what you could accomplish?

Then life happens, and it doesn’t always work out like you thought it would. Running turned into slogging. Your passion got sucker-punched. The opportunities and advancements kept coming in, but at some point, bewilderment set in. You just got tired…just plain weary.

Some call this burnout, and it may be. What if it is more than that? What if it is a bloody battlefield where, if not our very lives, our joy is under full attack. What if those God-given strengths, those life-honed skills, and serendipitous accomplishments seem not to be at play. Maybe you’re overthinking, or maybe…just maybe…the way through is surprisingly simple.

We all have an important place to occupy in this world. Every single one of us. Fight for it. Walls may seem high, bottlenecks too narrow, and, at times, adversaries hammering around us. Nevertheless…We can find a way to bring the walls down (or just go around them), squeeze through the bottlenecks, and shake off the idea that we can’t win…just. too. tired.

Circumstances in life and work can drain us. Especially over time. Oddly we can still be effective in life but the emotional, mental, and physical toll adds up. The body remembers…and keeps score.

Jesus gives us a beautiful and intimate picture of the “nevertheless”. The night before he would die on a Roman cross, he appealed to the Father, as his painful and humiliating death loomed ahead of him.

Photo Credit: Biblepic

Nevertheless…here was the Messiah, the Christ, in all the sinless perfection of his life, coming to the very end of himself. Exhausted, emotionally overwrought, yet clear-minded, understanding exactly what would be required from him. Nevertheless…he stayed the course. He was not giving up. He knew what was at stake. He trusted the Father, and he persisted in what he was called to finish.

Photo Credit: Leonard Ravenhill, QuoteFancy

For us, we have choices. We can resign ourselves to a life and work not what we anticipated…or we can clear our heads and remember our own callings. No walls are too high nor adversaries too strong.

Photo Credit: Biblepic

We each bring something to the table. If we withdraw from the table or accept a perceived exclusion, we can miss the fullness of life we were meant to have. Others will miss us as well. Believe that. It’s true.

When fatigue and discouragement set in, and our bodies are drained of response, we need to take hold of the “nevertheless”. It’s reminiscent of the many “but God’s” in Scripture and in life. We may be up against a Red Sea like Moses, or a Goliath like young David, or a corrupting culture like Jesus. We lament “but God”…we are too inadequate. Too small. Too aware of risk. Nevertheless, our “but God’s” can change to what is truth. The meaning of the protest changes into the “but God” miracles when He shows up and does what only He can do…in us. Through us.

Photo Credit: Biblepic

Hoping you lean into the “nevertheless” today.

Podcast – Why Everyone’s Freaking Out (& Why We Don’t Need To) – David Marvin, Guest on Relatable Podcast with Allie Beth Stuckey

15 Proven Ways to Suck the Life Out of Your Staff – Scott Cochrane – applies to any workplace. Take note of the “Strategies To-Avoid List”.

6 Things That Can Suck the Life Out of You! – Dale Hudson (and Part 2 on his story and how he dealt with those things that sucked the life out of him – to get you started, they are: People, Problems, Pressure, Pace, Pain, and Personal Sin)

The Humble Rejoice – Rick Bee

Nevertheless – Robert Ferguson

Photo Credit: Pinterest

5 Friday Faves – ‘Interstellar’ on Guitar, Healing After Trauma, Benefactors in Education, Hope for Human Trafficking, and the ‘American Idol’ Finale

It’s the weekend! Here are my five favorite finds of the week plus a big list of bonuses (since I didn’t post my faves last week). Enjoy!

1) ‘Interstellar’ on Guitar – Get ready for Nathan‘s arrangement and performance of Hans Zimmer composer ‘s brilliant theme for the film Interstellar.

The Story of How Hans Zimmer Wrote the “Interstellar’ Theme Will Give You Chills – Gus Lubin

Beyond the Guitar YouTube Channel

2) Healing After Trauma – A favorite author of mine, Karen Swallow Prior, got hit by a bus one year ago this week. It is not the sort of thing you rise up from – especially in the way she has, back to teaching, writing, and running. Nigh unto a miracle! Photo Credit: Wikimedia Commons

She writes about the trauma she experienced in the article Role of the Body in Healing After Trauma.

“I confess that before experiencing this trauma, I thought that emotional (as well as spiritual) healing consisted primarily in thinking the right things and believing the right things. I didn’t understand the role the body plays. Yet, the original meaning of the word “emotion” is “a physical disturbance.” Emotions originate in the body, not the mind.”

Dr. Bessel van der Kolk explains in The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma, “traumatized people chronically feel unsafe inside their bodies.” Because trauma is an embodied experience, the book shows, those who have suffered trauma must pay attention to the sensations of their bodies in order to recover:

Being frightened means that you live in a body that is always on guard. Angry people live in angry bodies. The bodies of child-abuse victims are tense and defensive until they find a way to relax and feel safe. In order to change, people need to become aware of their sensations and the way that their bodies interact with the world around them.

For healing from trauma to take place, Van der Kolk says, “the body needs to learn that the danger has passed”.” – Karen Swallow Prior

I am thankful that Dr. Prior has recovered so well from the terrible accident she experienced. The healing she is experiencing after that trauma clearly goes so much deeper than just her body returning to its [new] normal.

Role of the Body in Healing After TraumaKaren Swallow Prior

A New Normal: 10 Things I’ve Learned About Trauma – Catherine Woodiwiss

3) Benefactors in Education – We have all benefited from others all across our education. Benefactors – people who went above and beyond. I have teachers from as far back as first grade whose names are still with me. Teachers who instilled curiosity and wonder. Others, including our parents, who invested in us, both in our learning and our mastery of the stuff of life. Through this week, I discovered 3 small news events/articles that I wanted to pass on – three very different benefactors but heroes all:

Billionaire investor Robert F. SmithMorehouse Commencement Speaker to Pay Off Class of 2019’s Student Loans – Bo Emerson

Photo Credit: KUT NPR Radio

The folks at Libraries Without BordersBringing Literacy to Laundromats with Libraries Without Borders – Kim Doleatto

Parents and parent-surrogates who emotionally engage with their kids (young and old) – New Study: The More You Hug Your Kids, The More Their Brains Will Grow

Are there benefactors in your education? Please give them a shout-out in the Comments.

4) Hope for Human Trafficking – [This is about sexual trafficking, in particular.] This past week I got to watch the film Nefarious: Merchant of Souls. It is a documentary on the global sex trade and it will shock you at the scope and complexity of this terrible problem.

We must be willing to look at this pervasive problem, and we must have hope. The kind of hope driven by awareness and action.Photo Credit: Abolitionion

  • Read all you can through the International Justice Mission.
  • Volunteer with and/or support a local justice agency. Ours is Richmond Justice Initiative.
  • Seek training through one of these agencies.
  • Investigate what your local law enforcement agencies are doing to combat sex trafficking. Determine what the laws are in your state.
  • Finally, be vigilant in watching for those around you who may be victims of sex trafficking, or targets of sex traffickers. I have the National Human Trafficking Hotline in my phone contacts. It is 888-373-7888.

I have the hotline number in my phone because one day I was shopping in a large thrift store, and caught a strange exchange between a very young mom and a middle-aged man. We were all in the children’s clothing section of the store. He was making small talk with her and clearly (by the content of their conversation) had not known her before that interaction. He asked her too-familiar questions, and she talked freely, revealing intimate details about her life situation.To this stranger. They ended up leaving the store at the same time, if not together. It was hard to tell. I actually followed them out, but when I got outside they were gone. That fast. Maybe it was nothing…but that was the day I put the hotline number in my phone…and I still remember that young mom and pray for her when I do. Now, she may be just fine, raising her baby in the circle of a loving family. I hope so.

This problem is so wrong, the world over. We must do what we can.

YouTube Video – Sex Trafficking Survivor Tells Her Harrowing Story – Megyn Kelly Today

I Am Jane Doe Film

[After such a serious subject, I almost feel weird to end with such a light one…but I don’t think it will make you forget the problem above.

5) The ‘American Idol’ Finale – I’m not so much into reality shows, but this particular show has captured a bit of my heart. No way to know what happens behind the scenes of this production, but the young people who compete to become this year’s American Idol are stellar! Out of hundreds came a Top 20 who all have incredible voices, personality, and style.Photo Credit: American Idol, ABC

Week by week, contestants were let go, first by the judges, and then by a vote of American fans. In the end, three incredibly talented and lovable finalists remained: Madison Vandenburg, Alejandro Aranda, and Laine Hardy. All three of these young people will have music careers ahead of them. Incredibly talented. The winner this season? Louisiana country singer Laine Hardy – watch the video below for the exciting reveal and Hardy performing his debut single.

That’s it for me this week. Any favorite finds you’d like to share with us? Please do in Comments below. Blessings!

Bonuses:

C. S. Lewis: Beware the Temptation of the ‘Inner Ring’ – Art Lindsley

Tim Conway died this week. A man who made us all laugh.

https://news.microsoft.com/features/people-living-with-als-share-their-data-in-extraordinary-effort-to-end-the-devastating-disease/?ocid=lock

How we respond to one grieving…what do we say? Video below with Kelly Corrigan (author of Tell Me More)

45 hilarious times Americans didn’t get how things work in Britain

It’s Not Just Salt, Sugar, Fat: Study Finds Ultra-Processed Foods Drive Weight Gain – Maria Godoy

The season of produce stands (this one is in the family):Photo Credit: Carol Wink, Facebook