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Worship Wednesday – This World Is Not Our Home – Not Where I Belong by Building 429

February 24, 2016 admindeb Leave a comment

Photo Credit: Pinterest

Blessed are those whose strength is in you, whose hearts are set on pilgrimage...They go from strength to strength, till each appears before God in Zion. – Psalm 84:5,7

I used to love politics – back in the day the word seemed to have more to do with governing than with power. Now it’s all turned upside down. In the US we are in that political season of preparing to elect the next President. What a jumble the electoral process turns out to be! Still, I am thankful for the freedom to vote…whatever the outcome we face.

In fact, today I voted early in the primary election, being that I will be out of town for our scheduled state primary election. In the Fall, when we have the final vote for the President, I wonder if the choice will be between two candidates neither of which I could even imagine voting for.

When we lived overseas, I would talk glowingly about our government. Most of my friends would chuckle at the absurdity of my thinking that our government wasn’t corrupt. “All governments are corrupted,” they would say. I was reminded of that quote “Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.” (John Dalberg-Acton)

Are we reconciling ourselves to a political process that will lead to a larger and larger government? Are we determined to circle our wagons tightly around ourselves, forgetting the world beyond our borders? Are we becoming a culture so enamored of and dependent on our government, for safety and security, that, for some of us, it seems we are more like foreigners here, than at home?

Just 50 years ago, the youth of our nation wanted smaller government, less intrusion in their lives. Now in less than a span of two generations, it seems our young voters want more government. More. More. More.

I get to the place of not having words…as if I am trying to comprehend a foreign language, like in our life overseas…when it wasn’t just strange words but different ideologies.

Then…I read something, in passing, thumbing through social media one day, and the fog cleared.

A friend of mine posted this on Facebook:

“My heart has been troubled as I’ve watched the news and seen how the election has been playing out. I’ve tried to figure out how it is possible to get the “right guy ” in there and today, God has reminded me that I serve Him and my citizenship is in Heaven. I love my country and want the best for it, but in a hundred years, I will be with Jesus and whatever is to come between now and then is not a surprise to Him. ‪#‎pray‬ ‪#‎psalm49″‬

I, too, am grateful to live in this country where we have freedom of religion, freedom of speech…and so many other privileges. Yet, in the end, this is not my forever home. We are meant to work hard to preserve this nation for one another, and for generations before us…yes. However, we are to remember that whatever happens…whatever we face in this nation’s future…we are not home yet.

Worship with me, with the help of Christian band Building 429’s Where We Belong:

Sometimes it feels like I’m watching
From the outside
Sometimes it feels like I’m breathing
But am I alive?
I will keep searching for answers
That aren’t here to find

(Chorus)
All I know is I’m not home yet
This is not where I belong
Take this world and give me Jesus
This is not where I belong

So when the walls come falling down on me
And when I’m lost in the current of a raging sea
I have this blessed assurance holding me.

Chorus

When the earth shakes
I wanna be found in You
When the lights fade
I wanna be found in You

Chorus (X2)

Where I belong (X4)*

Photo Credit: Faithful in Christ

*Lyrics – Where I Belong – KLOVE

YouTube Lyric Video – Where I Belong – Building 429

YouTube Video – Where I Belong Official Music Video – Building 429

Story Behind the Song – Where I Belong – YouTube Video – Building 429’s Jason Roy Shares the Heart Behind “Where I Belong”

Song Facts – Where I Belong by Jason Ingram and Jason Roy

Worship Wednesday – Blessings Disguised – Laura Story’s Discovery of the Mercies of God

YouTube Video – Blessings by Laura Story

Heaven Our Home – Slideshare

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Shared Memories – On Family with a Grateful Nod to the Story-telling of Downton Abbey

February 23, 2016 admindeb 5 Comments

Photo Credit: Vanity Fair

Shared memories…those places, friendships, events, emotions, experiences, and impressions known intimately by that little circle called family of origin. Notwithstanding, shared memories can also be the property of life-long friends or even a happenstance experience of strangers. Still I am enthralled by the great legacy of shared memories – some shimmering with joy and some we wish forgotten – both binding us together as family.

What a blessing are the in-law family members added to the fold! Those who listen with interest or at least value that bond – as dinner conversation is hijacked by memories of growing up together. What a gift that arena is where shared memories are rehearsed and celebrated…one. more. time.

For those reading not Downton Abbey fans, don’t miss this lesson on family life. Mary and Edith are adult sisters (missing the youngest, Sybil, whose sweetness had knit the other two together, before her untimely death). Their relationship is not close, to say the least, and their actions have, at times, been brutally hurtful toward each other.

In the next-to-last episode of the final season of Downton Abbey, Mary’s venomous words cut deep again, seemingly destroying once again Edith’s prospect for happiness. Then in a turn of the story, (spoiler alert), Mary accepts the proposal of Henry, and they prepare to wed days later.

Enter Edith…as we watch enrapt. What next between these two?

Sarene Leeds, of the Wall Street Journal, recaps this bit of the episode:

“By the time of Mary’s wedding day, Edith has cooled off enough to not only attend the nuptials, but take the high road when it comes to her relationship with her sister. She hasn’t gotten over what Mary did, but family remains paramount to her:

“In the end, you’re my sister,” Edith tells Mary. “And one day, only we will remember Sybil. Or Mama or Papa, or Matthew or Michael or Granny or Carson or any of the others who have peopled our youth. Until at last, our shared memories will mean more than our mutual dislike.””

Photo Credit: Pinterest.com

“Only we will remember…” How powerful that is! Not in an exclusive, “none others welcomed” sort of way…but in a high value, meant to be treasured way.

I think of our children – spending their pre-school years in eastern Tennessee, then living the rest of their childhood in North Africa. What they missed and what they gained…in this somewhat nomadic life with all the hellos and goodbyes…is their shared experience.

We also share it with them…for which I am beyond grateful…and out of which I can be, at times, this mama who clings a bit to them…not as much to the memories as to the ones who soldiered with us through that life. We know each other in that shared memory way.

They remember all the moves, the beauty of those places, and all the wonderful friendships in each place. They understand God’s grace in that. In some ways, as expats in countries not our own, we grew up together.

They remember the sweet times with family back in the States…and the growing up together (through too occasional visits but deep belonging).

They remember their grandmother, my mom, who died too early. They remember how much she loved them (I hope); for sure they remember the woman she was.

So many shared memories include other loved ones who are no longer here (cousin Chad and their Uncle Robert)…and births, graduations, weddings, life accomplishments and disappointments…and on it goes.

My hope and prayer, like with Edith’s wonderful lines from Downton, is that, as adult life fills with relationships and experiences less-shared, we return regularly to the bonds of shared memories…including making new ones together. Edith returned to her childhood home to witness her sister Mary’s wedding…as hard as it was for her; it mattered.

You may be in the throes of change in your life that you can’t stop. A looming divorce, a frightening illness, a company down-sizing – where loss of history, situation, or relationship are all too present. Shared memories cannot be destroyed in community – they may feel altered by present circumstance, but they don’t have to be. Our memories belong to us.

My dad has Alzheimer’s. His memories are diminished now. When we visit, we remind him of stories that bring joy to his heart. We look at photo albums and remember together those faces who love him. We, his children, keep his memories for him. Such a privilege for us.

What a great legacy we have with each other – this life we shared…this life we share.

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Monday Morning Moment – Kindness Over Cleverness – Work Culture Where Employee Satisfaction Impacts Marketing

February 22, 2016 admindeb 3 Comments

Photo Credit: Scoopnest

Quite remarkably, I recently came across several articles on kindness, of all things, in the Harvard Business Review. It was thrilling for me to see it commended as a business process in such a prestigious journal. I have loved the idea of kindness since early childhood. It seemed such a reasonable choice in dealing with others, much more pleasing than cleverness. [Now, if I were more clever, then it might have proved a harder choice.]

Although we were not in church as young children, my mom taught us the Disney form of kindness: “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all.” – from the film Bambi.

When we, later in my childhood, became involved in a church community, I discovered the great teachings of God about kindness, which further stoked my resolve. Whenever possible, acting in kindness was the right choice…in personal relationships and in the workplace.

These days, in tight-knit tribal leadership and competitive companies, kindness is too often sacrificed for the bottom-line. You can imagine how refreshing it is for me to see that business thinkers and strategists are taking note of the profitability of kindness as a process – both internally (organizational human relations) and externally (marketing). A work culture of strategic, intentional kindness – just think of that!

If you go to Harvard Business Review’s website and search the word kindness, all sorts of articles pop up. I was most intrigued by Bill Taylor’s pieces on “kindness over cleverness”. He is the founder of Fast Company magazine and author of Practically Radical. He tells stories of companies who have been successful in practicing kindness strategically. He is inspired by Jeff Bezos’ experience growing up with a wise grandfather who taught him to choose kindness over cleverness. That story is told by Bezos himself in the TED Talk (linked below).Photo Credit: National Education Policy Center

Ted Talk Video – Jeff Bezos, Founder of Amazon – Princeton Commencement Address on What Matters More Than Talents – Gifts vs. Choices

If we wanted to take individual (and corporate) kindness up several notches in our workplace and workforce, what would those processes be? What would we have to give up in order to raise employee satisfaction to such a level that it extends to product excellence and customer service? For leadership, it might be giving up some control and extending a kinder and wiser empowerment, For employees, it might be giving up a timid fatalism and risking a kinder boldness (less of “the great Oz” scenario). I would love to hear what business processes you have in place that celebrate kindness over cleverness. What kind of work culture does your leadership model and cultivate? What can you do yourself, whatever your leadership culture is? See Matt Monge’s article on leading without a title. [Please share in Comments section below.]

We have a choice, after all.

I hope to write more about this because it is intriguing to me how our own delight in our work and product can pour over into our profitability and success.

For today, I close with some of my favorite quotes from these Harvard Business Review articles:Photo Credit: Larry Ferlazzo

“Kindness has a strategic role to play, especially when it comes to winning over customers in an intensely competitive and slowly recovering economy.” – Jeffrey F. Rayport

“Success today is about so much more than just price, quality, reliability – pure economic value. It is about passion, emotion, identity – sharing your values.” – Bill Taylor

Success is not just about marketing differently from other companies…It is also, and perhaps more important, about caring more than other companies — about customers, about colleagues, about how the organization conducts itself in a world with endless opportunities to cut corners and compromise on values…You can’t be special, distinctive, and compelling in the marketplace unless you create something special, distinctive, and compelling in the workplace. How does your brand shape your culture? How does your culture bring your brand to life? – Bill Taylor

“What is it about business that makes it so hard to be kind?” I asked at the time. And what kind of businesspeople have we become when small acts of kindness feel so rare? …By all means, encourage your people to embrace technology, get great at business analytics, and otherwise ramp up the efficiency of everything they do. But just make sure all their efficiency doesn’t come at the expense of their humanity. Small gestures can send big signals about who we are, what we care about, and why people should want to affiliate with us. It’s harder (and more important) to be kind than clever.” – Bill Taylor

“Compassion is a great equalizer. When you approach others with genuine concern for their well-being, your standing in the organizational hierarchy is less of a barrier to a productive conversation…Kindness, in other words, is rarely inappropriate.“ – Allison Rimm

Is Kindness a Strategy? – Jeffrey F. Rayport

Brand Is Culture, Culture is Brand – William C. Taylor

It’s More Important to Be Kind Than Clever – William C. Taylor

Why Is It So Hard to Be Kind? – William C. Taylor

10 Ways You Can Show Leadership Without a Title – Matt Monge – The Mojo Company

To Guide Difficult Conversations, Try Using Compassion – Allison Rimm

Photo Credit: Larry Ferlazzo

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5 Friday Faves – Syria, Antonin Scalia, People Who Pray, Alzheimer’s, & Family Resources

February 19, 2016 admindeb 5 Comments

1) Syria – Before & After – In the Spring of 2011, seemingly as part of the “Arab Spring” political uprisings, civil war erupted in Syria. News cycles are not predictable. Sometimes the greatest suffering in the world is overshadowed by a celebrity divorce or the debut of the latest version electronic device. What has happened in Syria over the last 5 years should continue to haunt us and drive us to act on behalf of these war-weary, displaced people. A riveting one-minute video reminds us of the destruction – this, of Homs, Syria – destruction via drone coverage.Photo Credit: Global Info News

2) Antonin Scalia – I was writing this weekend when Dave came in and told me that Antonin Scalia had died. He was an Associate Justice of the Supreme Court of the United States (March 11, 1936 – February 13, 2016). Appointed to the Court in 1986 by President Ronald Reagan, Scalia has been “characterized as the anchor of the court’s conservative majority” (Biography.com). His strong, sometimes biting, opinions are part of our history now through the Supreme Court record. I didn’t always understand their decisions, but he taught me so much about the law and the workings of our government. As strong a conservative as he was, his closest friend on the Court was reportedly Ruth Bader Ginsburg. It reflects how he could separate the people from the opposing views they may have – an example of honoring others – which we could all learn from him.

Photo Credit: Quotes Giant

Following are a few quotes of Justice Scalia (posted by the Breitbart News Agency)

“More important than your obligation to follow your conscience, or at least prior to it, is your obligation to form your conscience correctly.”

“A Constitution is not meant to facilitate change. It is meant to impede change, to make it difficult to change.”

“I attack ideas. I don’t attack people. And some very good people have some very bad ideas. And if you can’t separate the two, you gotta get another day job.”

“If you’re going to be a good and faithful judge, you have to resign yourself to the fact that you’re not always going to like the conclusions you reach. If you like them all the time, you’re probably doing something wrong.”

Finally, these quotes, posted by Politico from Justice Scalia’s speech for the Knights of Columbus:

“God assumed from the beginning that the wise of the world would view Christians as fools … and he has not been disappointed,” Scalia said.

“If I have brought any message today, it is this: Have the courage to have your wisdom regarded as stupidity,” he added. “Be fools for Christ. And have the courage to suffer the contempt of the sophisticated world.”

Justice Scalia – you will be missed…at least, by some of us.

3) People Who Pray – What a gift to know people pray for us! That God calls us to pray and moves in response to our prayers is such a beautiful mystery. This week two situations have brought this sharply to mind. For several weeks I have been undergoing an evaluation to determine whether or not an incidental finding was cancer. Yesterday, enough testing was completed to deliver a verdict of good news – for the time being, we just watch it. You can imagine how grateful I am for that, and for all those who prayed and encouraged me over these many weeks. Photo Credit: I Shine

The other situation involves a young couple we know and love. The husband, and father of three littles, has been diagnosed for over a year now with a very aggressive cancer. He has courageously undergone multiple modalities of therapy – fighting for his life, for his own sake and for that of his sweet family. To this day, he continues to battle this terrible disease. We are so humbled by the journey of this family and how God is glorified in their courage, their love (for Him, each other, and all those around them), and the joy they display for each day’s gift, each day’s victory (however large or small). What a privilege to pray for these dear ones…and others all around us, in the hard places! In those hard places, we see God work His grace into those situations that gives us hope for when we will live in the hard.Photo Credit: War Room – YouTube

4) Alzheimer’s – My dad has Alzheimer’s. This disease does not define him but, unfortunately, it has placed limits. Still, this week, Alzheimer’s does not win in my father’s life. He had the opportunity recently to move into a new, innovative memory care unit, very near to more family. Concern was expressed that the move might set him back – causing confusion and anxiety in a new and unfamiliar environment. I had the opportunity to be there to help with his transition. He did great. He doesn’t smile as often as he used to, but that smile makes the sun come out for all of us.[Dad, morning of the move, and first morning in his new home]

5) Family Resources – This week I discovered this English mum of 4, Joanna May, who lives and writes internationally. Her website Mums.Kids.Jesus offers The Cultivate Love Challenge: 50+ Ideas and Resources to Help Your Family Grow in Love. She is a great encourager of us moms who hope to infuse the love and wisdom of Christ in our lives and for our families and communities. May’s Pinterest page includes these and other resources to help us moms of children of all ages – newborn to adult.

Photo Credit: Mums.Kids.Jesus

Before you launch into your weekend, I would love to hear, in Comments below, what your top experiences or discoveries have been this week. Hope your Friday ends well and your weekend if joyful and refreshing.

All Good Gifts, Books, Contentment, Conversations, Emotions, God, Gospel, Holidays, Jesus, Loneliness, Love, Love Your Neighbor, steadfast love

Valentine’s Day – Hit-or-Miss Holiday Or One Pointing to a Larger Love

February 14, 2016 admindeb 3 Comments

Valentine’s Day – what a holiday loaded with expectations! As with other special days of the year, the marketing for Valentine’s Day drives us to do something – something different (?) than we might do any other day of the year. That same marketing drains our hearts of joy if we miss the mark of those expectations…either as recipient or deliverer of the goods. Silly holiday.

The pressure to express our love with gifts/experiences on Valentine’s Day is enormous. “How do I love thee? Let me count the dollars.” heads one fascinating infographic on how we spend Valentine’s Day. Americans on average will spend $100 and up on Valentine’s Day – “and up” more likely.

I actually like all the hearts and sweetnesses of Valentine’s Day, but the thought of spreading that love every day is much more appealing.

Dr. Gary Chapman, author of The Five Love Languages, describes five ways we experience love. He wrote several love language books, each focused on a different group – children, teens, singles, men, and women. His books aren’t the Gospel on the topic, BUT they are immensely helpful. How we experience being loved is often weighted toward one or two of the following: acts of service, gifts, physical touch, time, and/or words of affirmation. Both my husband and I share the preferences of love received through words of affirmation and acts of service. Getting older, having time with those I love is also a huge gift of love, knowing how busy and pulled we all are in this life.

Still the oldest, most enduring, and deepest experience of love we can have…and you know where I’m going…is the love of God. Valentine's Day - God's Love - Crosstrain - Blog Photo Credit: Not Consumed

We need look no farther than that. I was single more years than I’ve been married…what we need to fill our hearts goes beyond human relationships, as good as they may be sometimes (whether friend or family). In all the years of my life, after hearing of God’s love and then embracing it, He has never failed me. His love never fails (Lamentations 3:22-23).

In fact, we don’t need to look as much for His hand as His face. God loves, exquisitely, because God is love (1 John 4:8). The very definition.

I bring nothing new to the table on this subject. My longing is to be a good steward of His love to those He places in my path. There is so much brokenness in the world – so much heartache. If mending would come through flowers, chocolates and a candlelit meal, how lovely would that be. Mending our hearts comes through a cross and a love that meets us in our loneliest places. By His grace in our lives, that’s the love we can extend…that love. Photo Credit: Counting My Blessings

What Science Gets Right and Wrong About Love – Think Christian

12 Quotes to Remind You of God’s Amazing Love by Deb Wolf

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5 Friday Faves – Video Games, NFL Man of the Year, Hospitality, Writing, and Animal Courage

February 12, 2016 admindeb 1 Comment

It’s that glorious Friday again. Here are my favorite finds of the week:

1) Video Games – What is the appeal of video games for our boys and men? It is a mystery to me. I do understand the gaming camaraderie between players – some friends, some strangers who become friends, kinda sorta. The cutting-edge graphics designed mostly for the eyes of our guys are clearly appealing. And levels…oh, the levels keep our boys and men coming back for the challenge – the competition on an even playing field – without judging from outsiders. Well, except for the occasional run-ins with wife or mother. Lastly, it’s the welcome mindlessness, I’m thinking. The momentary escape from organic chemistry, or frustrating job, or Master’s thesis, or [fill in the blank].

We all have indulgent time-wasters, and I battled with my boys over video games more than I should have. My regret over that transformed into joy this week, as the guitarist son of mine actually turned a video game theme into a lovely work on classical guitar. Who would have thought it? To see Nathan smile (at minute 1:40 in video) makes me wonder at the sweet memory he has of that game’s music. Hello again, Legend of Zelda. Don’t remember you like this.

2) NFL Man of the Year – I’m not a big football fan, but when we came across the NFL Honors program the night before the Superbowl I was intrigued. Football seems all about leaving it on the field. This was a salute to a band of brothers and the stand-outs among them, both on the field and off. There were three nominees for the Walter Payton Man of the Year Award for 2015 – Anquan Boldin, Eli Manning, and Benjamin Watson. Each man’s character and philanthropic work were highlighted in video vignettes. With all the tabloid coverage of the antics of some of our professional athletes, it was inspiring to see how others spend their off-season time. Anquan Boldin, the San Francisco 49ers wide receiver, received this year’s award from the Payton family. Read more about Anquan’s work in the global community here.Photo Credit: Mercury News

Another highlight of the Man of the Year NFL Honors focus was a welcome reminder of Benjamin Watson and his redemptive statement on Facebook (regarding the 2014 Ferguson Decision). In this profession of moneyed celebrity, it was refreshing to see upclose the caliber of such men as Boldin, Manning, and Watson.

3) Hospitality – Hospitality is defined at Google as “the friendly and generous reception and entertainment of guests, visitors, or strangers.” We live in a culture today of “come as you are; just hanging out with friends; bring your own food/beverage”. I love the comfortable sound and easy experience of that. However, I hope we don’t lose the great global habit of extending generous hospitality – where nothing is expected but the welcome presence of the guest. We lived for many years in North Africa where they expect hospitality of themselves and they lavish it on their guests. Even in the poorest of homes, the cookies and fruit are beautifully presented, and the tea is poured with great ceremony. I learned so much from my Arab and Berber friends and neighbors…and don’t want to forget ever to extend hospitality. There is a difference between service and hospitality – described in TED Talks and distinctive in industry. [I wrote about this here.]

“Hospitality is about looking out instead of looking in…I can look outward and help someone else.” – Bobby Stuckey. The Bible is full of examples of hospitality and encouragements toward it. We are to extend blessing even as far as to our enemies. Benjamin Corey writes eloquently about this Biblical hospitality. Finally, Rosaria Butterfield, in her book The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert says this: “Hospitality means bringing the stranger in…you have to meet and respect people where they are…I believe strongly that hospitality is just the ground zero of the Christian life, and of evangelism, and of everything else that we do, apart from the formal worship of God.” Photo Credit: Amazon.com

It’s good to remember that we can extend hospitality in a less-than-perfect house, where toys are still scattered and books a bit piled. It’s more the attitude of the heart in celebrating the other. Also, by definition, hospitality doesn’t have to be based in the home. I will never forget spotting a friend, whose husband was also in graduate school, walking up my driveway, with a pot of coffee and favorite mugs. It turned my morning of home-schooling littles in something altogether other. Extending hospitality…mobile and on-the-fly.

4) Writing – I am always grateful for help in this skill of writing. Finding Chris Bailey’s blog (A Life of Productivity) and book (The Productivity Project) was a great boon to organizing my life and writing (my notes here). Daniel Darling’s blog this past week was another huge encouragement. He writes on how to be a prolific writer.

Darling gives 6 helps in writing: 1) I don’t wait for inspiration, for a cabin next to a mountain stream, or a light bulb. I just write; 2) I write from my passions on topics that interest me; 3) Always be cultivating and chronicling ideas; 4) I try to be curious and always learning; 5) I write in short bursts, in the margins of life; and 6) I try not to be a jerk. Don’t miss how he fills out the story on these points on his blog.

5) Animal Courage – When our kids were small and we were living overseas, we took with us this wildlife video entitled The Bear. Like other children’s videos (a lot from Disney), there were story bits that needed processing with a loving adult (like how often the mom dies in these stories…sigh). The Bear was filmed with an intentionality of demonstrating the real life struggle of life in the wild for these animals. Also depicted was the almost-human qualities of care and courage in these animals. I have used one scene of this movie in talks over the years on how gracious it is to have an advocate. One stronger or more influential than we are who stands with us, sometimes out of sight, against an adversary. The plot story involves a bear cub, orphaned when his mother dies (again?!) and an older adult male, beleaguered himself by hunters and the sheer strain of survival sometimes, who becomes the cub’s protector. Here’s the scene (fast-forward to minute 2:30 for time’s sake if needed).

I love this scene. It actually reminds me of us sometimes…and God. We stand as tall as we can and roar (like a wee cub) against the wrongs of this world – wrongs against us sometimes. We are not always aware, but the LORD (I believe from experience and His Word) issues a God-sized roar against those same wrongs. Our adversaries will be reckoned with.

YouTube Video – Scene from the film The Bear, 1988 (Cub & Cougar at 2:30 into scene)

Film The Bear

Top Ten Most Courageous Animals

Happy Friday! Have a weekend full of extending and receiving hospitality, quiet times of refreshment, and reflection on the God who watches over us. Also, hug those video-gaming men of yours…when they take a break (don’t want them to lose a level in the midst of wrestling them down to the floor), right? Right.

Any favorites you want to share? Or memories…or words of wisdom. Would love to hear them (Comment below).

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Love Notes – A Family Tradition – Started by Our Mom

February 11, 2016 admindeb 10 Comments

From the Archives

[On the eve of what would have been my Mom’s 89th birthday, I want to look back a bit to one of the sweetest customs she had – leaving love notes hidden to encourage us in her absence. She still encourages us…even in her absence. Love you, Mom.]

Therefore encourage one another and build up one another, just as you also are doing. – 1 Thessalonians 5:11

Encourage one another day after day, as long as it is still called “Today,” so that none of you will be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. – Hebrews 3:13

Our family has never lived close to the grandparents. This was never easy…for any of us. Before I married, I did live close to home, and my mom was my best friend. She died several years ago, and I often say to people who knew her that “when I grow up, I want to be just like her.” Still working on that.

Mom and I shared a weakness for words…they are probably excessively important to us, delivering both positive and (sometimes) negative weight. She was an amazing encourager. She rarely missed an opportunity to lift another’s spirit or to speak loving truth to someone desperate for God’s touch.

When I moved away to take a teaching job, she and my dad helped me move. New Haven, Connecticut was a 2-day drive from Georgia. It’s the farthest I had ever wandered from home. She stayed a week to help me settle in. While there, she was such great company. We explored the city together and laughed over a new culture and cried at the missing that was ahead for us.

She filled my freezer with her baking, and, while I was at work, she wrote notes. Then she hid them everywhere. After she flew home, I began finding them. In my coffee mug. Under my pillow. In the pocket of my coat. Among my reference books. Behind my music on the piano. She was with me in the love notes she left, and it made the distance between us…less.

My mom and I also had a weakness for bits of paper. I kept every one of her notes. These from that move over 30 years ago are fading…red ink on pink paper. There are a lifetime of notes between my mom and me. The tradition she started on that first move has become a life-long tradition for our family. Our visits back and forth, across the US and then the globe, have been papered by these little notes.

Our children, from the time they could write, entered into this tradition much to the joy of their grandparents. Before we would leave again, these three young ones would write of their affection for their grandparents and hide them all over their houses. I delighted in their cooperation in this conspiracy of love.

Mom always wrote notes…not just to us but to so many. She and her Sunday School Class ladies would send cards every week to the sick ones or the sad ones. She had a special burden for the elderly, for widows (including functional widows, deserted by husbands) and for fatherless children (again including those “orphaned” by still-living fathers). She inspired me by her humble ambition .

Pure and undefiled religion before our God and Father is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself unstained by the world. – James 1:27

I am so thankful for my mom’s bits of paper…for her love…and for her perseverance in encouraging and serving others. Her generation is aging, and it is for us to pick up these traditions and pass them on somehow to the next generations…Maybe there won’t be bits of paper or love notes like in the past. I do hope we still take the time to write. Definitely, the call to serve and to encourage is as current as today. My life continues to be rich with those, young and old, who reach out to those around them with words of affirmation and kindness. Written or not, they are love notes to my heart.

Thanks, Mom. Thank God for you.

The 59 “One Anothers” of the New Testament

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Worship Wednesday – An Incidental Finding Opens a Deeper Experience of God

February 10, 2016 admindeb 6 Comments

Photo Credit: Telegraph UK

Preserve me, O God, for in you I take refuge. I say to the Lord, “You are my Lord; I have no good apart from you.…The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup; You hold my lot.” The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance. I bless the Lord who gives me counsel; in the night also my heart instructs me. I have set the Lord always before me; because He is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken. – Psalm 16:1-2, 5-8

An incidental finding. You are referred to a specialist for something that concerns your family doctor. While you find out that the new problem is nothing for concern, in the testing the specialist finds something else that demands further testing. Then you go deeper and longer into the medical processes that eventually provide a diagnosis.

Photo Credit: en.Wikipedia

All through this waiting and wondering, you process much of it alone. It could be benign so why trouble those who love you. Still, the weeks turn into months working through to a diagnosis, and you want those prayers and the closeness that comes in times of struggle. So you decide to tell a few what’s going on. Along with this guarded sharing with some close to you, a deep and sure awareness develops – you were never alone, after all.

I am always amazed how when you need Him the most, God appears in those moments – so real it is as if you can touch Him, feel His breath, lean into His consummately strong shoulder.

Just this past Sunday at church, every single song chosen by our worship leader was meant for me. To know the nearness of God in a stretching season – hearing His voice in these songs: On Christ the Solid Rock I Stand, Lead Me to the Cross, Oceans, To the Ends of the Earth. What a comfort and joy!

This time, I am the one with the incidental finding. Even in the scary bits of the day, God has been so kind in pointing me to Himself and away from any future unknown. Besides, He is there in that future unknown. He carries me now; He will carry me then.

Just last night, a dear friend reminded me to stay on this side of the bridge, because that is where I am. Crossing the bridge is still ahead, after more medical testing. So much good comes through those who love us.Photo Credit: Memorial Health System

Starting on my way to one more doctor this week, as I turned the ignition, the radio came on as well, right in the middle of the most fitting song. Casting Crowns’ Just Be Held. I’ve written about it before here. Reminded again that God is right here with us…in every circumstance of life.

Worship with me, as we celebrate in the midst of a hard place, that God is near to His children. In these moments, “Just Be Held“.

Hold it all together
Everybody needs you strong
But life hits you out of nowhere
And barely leaves you holding on

And when you’re tired of fighting
Chained by your control
There’s freedom in surrender
Lay it down and let it go

So when you’re on your knees and answers seem so far away
You’re not alone, stop holding on and just be held
Your world’s not falling apart, it’s falling into place
I’m on the throne, stop holding on and just be held
Just be held, just be held

If your eyes are on the storm
You’ll wonder if I love you still
But if your eyes are on the cross
You’ll know I always have and I always will

And not a tear is wasted
In time, you’ll understand
I’m painting beauty with the ashes
Your life is in My hands

Lift your hands, lift your eyes
In the storm is where you’ll find Me
And where you are, I’ll hold your heart
I’ll hold your heart
Come to Me, find your rest
In the arms of the God who won’t let go.*

*Lyrics & Story Behind the Song Just Be Held

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5 Friday Faves – On Studying Your Spouse, Aging, Taking Criticism, Daily Routines, & Black History Month

February 5, 2016 admindeb 2 Comments

Hello, Friday. I don’t know about you but this has been a week of highs and lows in this world of mine. Hard news in some situations washed over by exquisite answers to prayer in other situations. As happens often with God, in the quiet of this morning, a favorite, heart-lifting passage in the Bible came up in my reading.

“You will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock.” – Isaiah 26:3-4

Even the Bible verses atop my facing journal pages this morning were like an anthem from God that all will be well. “Peace I leave with you; My peace I give you.” – John 14:27 and “My times are in Your hands, Lord.” – Psalm 31:15

With that intro to welcoming Friday this week, here are five of my favorite finds – all from the internet this week, although I did have a lot of sweetness in the real, as well.

1) Studying Your Spouse – Michael Hyatt welcomed Jackie Bledsoe as guest blogger on his website this week. Bledsoe writes very winsomely about how he learned to study his wife. He talks about how we, too often, think we know enough (relating to any field of study and work, ministry, marriage and family). Regarding his marriage, he observed: “We were both growing, just not together. My interests were changing and my wife, Stephana, didn’t always notice. Stephana’s needs were changing, but I was oblivious to them. Finally, we reached a point where we felt we didn’t really know each other. That was a scary discovery, one that you may be able to relate to. You may know the ins and outs of your business or ministry like nobody else. But maybe you don’t know the ins and outs of your spouse like nobody else. It may be time for you to enroll in the continuing education about your spouse.” Bledsoe lists 3 ways to get an advanced degree in your spouse: 1) Do new things together; 2) Take notes: and 3) Use your calendar. Read more here.Photo Credit: Daddy’s Hangout

2) Aging – a Video – I came across a video this week that really got me thinking about how I view aging. It is entitled The Wall. It is the work of Aroha Philanthropies, an organization “devoted to the transformative power of the arts and creativity, inspiring vitality in those over 55, joy in children and youth, and humanity in adults with mental illness”. Photo Credit: IoAging.org

The video begins with two elderly persons looking at the imposing face of a wall filled with the words that terrify most of us about getting older. Then as the video progresses, the images change to more engaging and lovely words that depict what can be part of our experience moving from youth to mid-life to older life. Through creativity and the arts from childhood throughout our years, we might see a very different future, with growing older being our “encore years”. Something to think about for all of us…and especially for our young creatives – to see these “old ones” as valuable peers…just a bit farther down the same road.

3) Taking Criticism – Dan Cumberland, writer and photographer in Seattle, Washington, writes about responding to a scathing comment he received once on one of his blogs. Complete with foul offensive language. In his article This Guy Really Hates Me (How to Take Criticism). In his post, he lists 5 guidelines of how to handle criticism:

1) Is there truth in it?; 2) Is it affirmed by others?; 3) Is the source credible?; 4) What are the source’s motives?; and 5) What can I learn here? Then Dan talked about how he dealt with his critic.

We all receive criticism and also, if we’re honest, dole it out ourselves. Hear Dan’s counsel: “When you receive criticism and negative feedback there’s a needed balance. Don’t write it off, but also be careful not to let it bring you down too much. Work to find the truth. When you don’t understand, ask for clarification.”

When we are offered criticism, take it – as a gift. Do with it what is helpful. Don’t fall into the trap of returning harm for what you perceived as harmful. You want to be better than that.Photo Credit: Quotesgram

4) Daily Routines Maria Popova, of Brain Pickings, wrote a fascinating post on Mozart’s Daily Routine – How a day is composed in the hours between sleep o’clock and symphony o’clock. Routines are a great help for me to organize life and truly accomplish what I hope to accomplish. I’ve written on routines, habit change, and productivity previously. Popova’s article (and others she linked in her post) offers a glimpse into the daily life of greatness. It was inspiring and refreshing. Early in Mozart’s life, he went without employment but maintained deep discipline in his composing of music. Later, as his popularity rose, he compromised his sleep in order to continue writing. Mozart’s life was legend for unhealthy choices, and he struggled at times with deep depression. The lesson for us is in a daily routine that helped him, whether poor or privileged, to produce magnificent music that continues timeless in its beauty.

Photo Credit: Tito Goldstein

5) Black History Month – Phillip Holmes wrote a great piece, on Black History Month, for Desiring God. It is entitled More Tough Skin and Tender Hearts – How to Prepare for Conversations on Ethnic Harmony. He talks in a frank and loving manner about evangelicalism and ethnic harmony. Holmes urges us to have real conversations across races and ideologies, rather than white-with-white (or black-with-black) discussion with those already in agreement with us. If we wrestle with the struggle, across racial, religious, and political lines, we might actually come to a place of true reconciliation.

I want to have the kinds of conversations he encourages: “As we engage in complicated conversations about racism, be sober-minded rather than drunk with hatred, frustration, and annoyance. Embrace humility and love those you disagree with. But continue to pursue truth and justice as these two are defined in the Holy Scriptures. The Bible must remain the basis for why we believe what we believe and a careful study of it reveals that it has much to say about ethnicity and injustice…These conversations are complex but necessary and we need men and women who can sit down and have hard conversations considering the other more significant.”

Read his full post. I do want to quote one more vital point Holmes covered beautifully: “As a church, whether we as individuals are white, black, brown, red, or yellow, Christians have to constantly remind ourselves of our primary allegiance. If you are a child of the king, adopted into the household of faith, you are Christian first. I am one million times more Christian than I am black. My brown skin may be what you first notice about me, but by God’s grace, my Christian faith is what you will remember… I count it a privilege to be physically dressed by my creator in such a beautiful skin tone…but I will forever check others and myself when I notice our ethnicity is taking precedent over our heavenly citizenship.”

Also read Kimberly Davis’ Black History Month and the Common Language of Christ.

Photo Credit: Teach Hub

What were some of your finds or favorite things of this week? I would love to hear about them. Have a safe and joyful weekend!

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Worship Wednesday – You Are Beautiful, God…and We Are Made in Your Image

February 3, 2016 admindeb 2 Comments

Photo Credit: Desert’s End

One thing I have asked from the LORD, that I shall seek: That I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, To behold the beauty of the LORD and to meditate in His temple. – Psalm 27:4

Before coffee this morning, I stretched myself awake. No note-to-self was perched on my keyboard. No song to highlight on today’s blog had come to mind. In the dark of this morning, this moment, quiet in my bed, the thought “You are beautiful” came to mind. Oh God! You are so beautiful!

We are surrounded by beauty in this life of ours. The glories of nature that stop us in our tracks to take it in. The faces of those we love who incredibly love us. The great satisfactions of pay for our labor, work that can make a difference, and rest when we’re weary. So much beauty in life – even in the midst of suffering. In fact, it is sometimes in the midst of suffering that the beauty of God is most evident – as we discover His presence in the resilience of the human spirit, the community that rallies, and the reach of outstretched hands.

How beautiful the works of God, but more beautiful God Himself. Mercy and justice perfectly blended. Love beyond anything of our understanding. Complete in the unity of God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. Impossible for me to grasp and yet more real than anything else in this life.

Wednesday morning often includes a walk around my neighborhood, but not today. Without my notice, the rain came to wash away the rest of the snow. Stepping out of the house, and seeing the rain, I made a quick retreat back in…but not without taking in the sky and capturing a shaky panorama of that dense gray. If you click on the image, you notice a bird sitting atop a branch of one of those sturdy oaks. Like that bird, we are so small taking in the vastness of this beautiful world God has made for us. This created beautiful thing we call home for now. How much more beautiful is the One who created all this vastness – yet a tiny marble in His universe.

He is beautiful. You are beautiful, God…and You call us beautiful simply made in Your image and as we radiate Your glory.

I wrote before (here) about the beauty of God, focusing on the song You’re Beautiful by Phil Wickham. Another song that comes to mind, thinking of the beauty of God is MercyMe’s Beautiful. This song actually focuses on our beauty. How hard it can be to focus on the beauty of God when we feel so broken ourselves! He has made us beautiful… I wish we could hold up a mirror to each other, struggling in whatever our hard places are today, such that we could see ourselves as God sees us. MercyMe has done that in the song Beautiful.

Mark Altrogge wrote the song, I Stand In Awe of You, almost 30 years ago. I remember singing it during our years of living in Cairo, Egypt. We worshipped with other believers and seekers, foreigners and Egyptians together, (at Heliopolis Community Church).

Photo Credit: HCC Cairo

Hearing this song in various accents would remind me afresh of what it will be one day when we see God in Heaven, When our eyes of faith will be made sight…and we see Him as He is…”beautiful beyond description”.

Worship with me:

You are beautiful beyond description
Too marvelous for words
Too wonderful for comprehension
Like nothing ever seen or heard
Who can grasp Your infinite wisdom?
Who can fathom the depth of Your love?
You are beautiful beyond description
Majesty enthroned above

And I stand, I stand in awe of You
I stand, I stand in awe of You
Holy God to Whom all praise is due
I stand in awe of You*

How have you experienced the beauty of God? Are there moments when you have had a glimpse of His beauty in your circumstances…or when He’s given you eyes to see how beautiful He’s made you? I would love to hear your stories (Comment below).

*Lyrics to I Stand In Awe of You by Mark Altrogge – as sung by Annie Herring

I Stand In Awe – Mark Altrogge, 1987 – at and Spiritual Songs

Story Behind the Song I Stand In Awe of You by Mark Altrogge Photo Credit: The6C