“Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.” – Jesus – Matthew 6:12
“And then many will be offended, will betray one another, and will hate one another.Thenmany false prophets will rise up anddeceive many.And because lawlessness will abound, the love of many will growcold.But he who endures to the end shall be saved.” – Jesus – Matthew 24:10-13
Throughout Scripture, we are taught to forgive. How can we withhold forgiveness when Christ forgives us? How can we justify our own sin because we are offended by the sin of another? In Matthew 24 above, Jesus is teaching about the end times. We must be vigilant in how we live our lives because of 1) the temptation to pull away from the teachings of Christ and 2) the hold of entitlement and the sin of offense.
The three books above all speak to these matters. With a common theme.
All speak of the deadening outcome of unforgiveness and its eroding impact on our hearts and relationships…with God and each other.
I wrote about offense another time. Please revisit it here. You may be surprised at the destructive nature of offense – offending and allowing ourselves to be offended.
Worship with me to Matthew West’s Forgiveness [Lyrics in the link].
Heavenly Father, thank You for this pattern of prayer that Jesus taught. Give me a gentle spirit and help me to be quick to forgive all those who have hurt or abused me… knowing that for Christ’s sake I have been forgiven of so much. I pray that I may maintain close fellowship with You, and be swift to forgive those who sin against me – in Jesus name, AMEN.” – Daily Verse
I’m going to close here. This topic on a Worship Wednesday is one that should draw us to prayer…and maybe repentance. We can’t always find ourselves in “righteous” indignation…when we look to the Cross. Are forgiveness and refusing to be offended hard? Yes, but we have the power of the Spirit of God indwelling us and making it possible, with willing hearts. Our families, churches, and communities have been too long divided. Jesus deserves better.
“I pray for them…for those you have given me, because they are yours…Holy Father, protect them by your name that you have given me, so that they may be one as we are one…May they all be one, as you, Father, are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us, so that the world may believe you sent me. I have given them the glory you have given me, so that they may be one as we are one. I am in them and you are in me, so that they may be made completely one, that the world may know you have sent me and have loved them as you have loved me.”– from John 17, Jesus’ high priestly prayer
“…Walk worthy of the calling you have received,with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, making every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to one hope at your calling—one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is above all and through all and in all.” – Paul, Ephesians 4:1-6
“Now I urge you, brothers and sisters, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree in what you say, that there be no divisions among you, and that you be united with the same understanding and the same conviction.” – Paul, 1 Corinthians 1:10
“…bearing with one another and forgiving one another if anyone has a grievance against another. Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you are also to forgive. Above all, put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity.” – Paul, Colossians 3:13-14
OK…what else needs to be said, right?
We are so easily offended. So put off by others. Our preferences screaming to be acknowledged. Our spiritual sensibilities riding tenuously on our sleeves, easily jostled by the words or attitudes of another.
If anything, we are united in this frailty of ours. The unspoken (maybe) desire to be right. To be more accurate in our take on things…especially spiritual things and how church “should be done”.
Oh my!
I am stepping on my own feet here.
That’s why I bought the book Until Unity by Francis Chan. We had just finished a church-wide, months-long study of another Chan book, Multiply. It was deep and exhausting in a mind-clearing way.
I wasn’t really looking to jump into another study by this intense brother of ours…but this book scratches a worsening itch in my heart. Our desperate need, as followers of Christ, for unity.
Because of our politics (in this nation…and maybe in yours as well), we are terribly divided. Even as Christians. Between politics and preferences, we circles our wagons in way too many denominations in the Christian faith. Then there are those influencers, mega-church pastors and women writers, with huge fan bases (did I just say that?). What offends them is taken to the airways and further divides us into camps…camps of which Jesus did not call us.
Just this week, Francis Chan’s online study of the book Until Unity launched. It is so good. Free and easily accessible. I have the book, too, but the video study also stands alone for those unable to get the book.
Chan introduces the study by calling us to hold onto truth, holiness, AND unity. Too often, we think we have to sacrifice one for another. Wrong! However, to hold onto all three requires our desire for God to work…only God has the power and plan to glorify Himself, in his church and each of his followers, through our walking together in unity, in truth, and in holiness.
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, and your ways are not my ways.” This is the LORD’s declaration. “For as heaven is higher than the earth, so My ways are higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.” – Isaiah 55:8-9
Chan recalled to the viewers the passage in Exodus 14 where the Israelites were in a hard place – pursued by the Egyptian army and facing the Red Sea. They had no plan. No way out. Then Moses called to them…and to us in this matter:
“Don’t be afraid. Stand firm and see the Lord’s salvation He will provide for you today; for the Egyptians you see today, you will never see again. The Lord will fight for you; you must be quiet.” – Exodus 14:13-14
We must replace our opinions with prayers. Being silent sometimes communicates that just maybe only God has the right answer on something. In being quiet, I’m not saying to be passive or yield to what is not true or right…BUT to wait on God. Pursuing both truth AND unity.
[Chan used the white board to show how high God’s knowledge is and the gap between his knowledge and ours. Whomever we are – whether it is Francis Chan or someone with greater or lesser knowledge or understanding on a spiritual subject…None of us…not of us…are anywhere close to God in this way. We must bow to Him in this. Choosing unity. Praying for Truth to win out. Looking to Him for His thoughts and His ways.]Photo Credit: Screenshots from the Introduction to the online Bible study Until Unity
When we judge our brothers and sisters, we put ourselves higher. When we preach, teach, or disciple in ways that divide, we come against even what our Lord Jesus prayed for us. Be one. As he and the Father are one. That is our high calling. We have to prayerfully figure it out.
Worship with me – the God of truth, holiness, AND unity. He is always faithful, and, praise His name, His ways are higher than ours.
Come thou fount of every blessing Tune my heart to sing thy grace
Streams of mercy never ceasing
Call for songs of loudest praise
Teach me some melodious sonnet
Sung by flaming tongues above
Praise the mount I’m fixed upon it
Mount of thy redeeming love
Here I raise my Ebenezer
Hither by thy help I’m come
And I hope by thy good pleasure
Safely to arrive at home
Jesus sought me when a stranger
Wondering from the fold of God
He, to rescue me from danger
Interposed His precious blood
O to grace how how great a debtor daily I’m constrained to be!
Let thy goodness like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love Here’s my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above*
Weekend! Here you go: my favorite finds of the week. One long and four super short. Hope you are encouraged!
1) Who Is Jesus? – If you read my posts, then you know The Chosen TV series has had a huge impact on my life recently. [You can find it here and on The Chosen app. Dave and I just finished Season 2, watching Episode 8 this weekend. The story of this episode is Jesus’ preparation of his Sermon on the Mount. It is a very intimate time, very critical turn in his public ministry. All his apostles, his mom, and some other close followers are featured in the episode, in deep relationship with Jesus. Then there are those who oppose or are watchful of his growing influence – the religious leaders of the day and the Roman military charged with keeping order…keeping the peace.
In this episode, the story shows dialog between Jesus and his apostle Matthew (again, not taking the place of Scripture, The Chosen writers repeat, but fleshing out what might have happened around the accounts found in Scripture). The Sermon on the Mount is found in full in the Gospel of Matthew and it would make sense he shared it with Matthew before he faced the crowds, for Matthew to capture it for all the rest of us who would read it…hear it in the years following.
If you know nothing about Jesus, you would discover him in his teaching in this sermon.Photo Credit: Press, The Chosen
Jesus knew this pivotal and powerful teaching would set in motion his becoming widely known…and what would come out of that – those who would love and follow him and those who would seek to destroy him. In this episode, he expressed to Matthew his desire for In the introduction to the sermon, also known as the Beatitudes, to be a “map…directions where people should look to find me”. Then as Jesus shares with Matthew “the blesseds” of the Beatitudes, we find those directions. Again, in the show, Jesus “If someone wants to find me, those are the groups they should look for”.
This may not make sense if you haven’t read Jesus’ words in the Beatitudes (you can find the scene on YouTube maybe, or read them here and be blessed by them).
Writer, theologian Dallas Willard“once suggested that the Beatitudes are, in fact, pronouncements of God’s blessing on all the people the world thinks are missing out. In essence, this would mean Jesus starts His teaching with pronouncements that look like the following:
God is for those who are spiritually bankrupt.
God’s favor in on those who mourn.
God is for those who are meek.
…the Beatitudes might be a list of pronouncements; Jesus might be announcing to the crowds — full of Jews, Gentiles, Herodians, Pharisees, and Romans alike — that God is for the ones they think He has abandoned.
Jesus will continue teaching that we would pray for those that persecute us and love our enemies…This Jewish rabbi is serious about loving people. So buckle up, because this ministry of Jesus is just getting started… – Marty Solomon
There is so much to know and experience in the person of Jesus Christ. You will not be the same if you truly examine his life and teaching. In closing this, you’ll find a Facebook post below from a friend of mine on:
A son A brother Part of a community An attender of weddings
It’s no wonder that after He made a whip and drove the profiteers out of the temple, the Jews asked Him for a SIGN to show that He had the authority to do such a thing.
He answered, “Destroy this temple, and I will raise it up in three days.” They didn’t understand and thought He was talking about a building, but He was talking about His own body. He knew exactly what was going to happen to Him!
He didn’t come to be popular. He came to be a SIGN. He was THE SIGN they were asking for. He came to show us the character, nature, and heart of God. He came to make a God who is beyond understanding, someone we could see and touch and know.
Wow.
I REFLECT JESUS WHEN MY ACTIONS POINT TO GOD AND NOT TO MYSELF. – Marlo Huber Salamy
2) Procrastinators – This is a struggle for me. If you want to explore this more, there are tons of resources on the web and your public library on this topic. I just want to quickly post Tim Urban’s humorous and telling TED Talk (which I found this week) and a few thought-provoking quotes, links, and “actionable ideas”.
3) The Silent To-Do List – In last week’s Friday Faves, I mention Dawn of The Minimal Mom. She really got me thinking more about decluttering again. Her manner is much more gentle and humane than other writers and bloggers so I’m going with her. In some of her videos, she mentions “the silent to-do list” that accompanies clutter.
She attributes this phrase to the Japanese author Fumio Sasaki who writes on minimalism. In his book Goodbye, Things, he writes about how the stuff in his life was causing him stress because it was as if all the clutter was calling out to him for attention, putting themselves on his to-do list. I actually get that. Stuff management can put a weight on us. Even if we’re doing nothing to deal with the clutter, it is there, beckoning to us with memories and the need to either store away or attend to something derived from the memory. A weight.
Here’s an example. I’m a photographer. Even in the digital age, pictures accumulate. Every time I go to and from bed, there’s a picture of a beloved aunt and cousin whom I haven’t seen in years. It’s being “left out” for a reason. I want to be back in touch with them but it might require a hard conversation. Something painful happened in our family years ago, and although it wasn’t between us, it could be the reason we have not stayed in touch. I don’t know for sure. This picture has become part of my silent to-do list. Sigh…
I’m not ready to embrace minimalism, but it is something I’m continuing to think about…and moving [ever so] slowly toward.
4) Forgiving What You Can’t Forget, etc. – OK…here’s a quick one. In the US, kids are starting back to school and change is in the air. Along with that, it seems a myriad of online studies are popping up. Three below are Bible studies. I’m in the middle of a quick study with Levi Lusko on “Winning Your Inner Battles”, then this coming week will tackle the Francis Chan study on Until Unity as well as Lysa Terkeurst‘s “Forgiving What You Can’t Forget”. The latter two are a few weeks long, and I’m ready for some stretching in the Word.
What are you doing to grow these days? Please comment below any studies (any…we are life-long learners here, right?) we might enjoy as well.
5) Summer – Just some images from this week to close. All taken on a day out and about, celebrating our anniversary. Hope you’re having a sweet summer (and for you in the Southern Hemisphere, a gentle winter). Beauty abounds.
Thanks for stopping by. It means so much to me. Blessings!
And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. – Colossians 3:15-20
37 years today.
The flight of years shows in our bodies and minds, but for us, it is most apparent in the launch of adult children into their own lives and marriages. Then…it comes back to just the two of us…and I am grateful for his company.
Our marriage has always been of a quiet steady sort . My husband and I married best friends. We were polar opposites in most ways, except our faith and being raised in Southern families. He was “read and follow directions” marrying “fly by the seat of her pants.” It was definitely a match made in Heaven because we would need the God of Heaven to keep us on course as we figured marriage out…both without and, later, with children.
In fact, those of you who know us well know the struggles we have had figuring out parenting (both young children and then adult children). Also the challenges of having very different ideas and giftings on doing life. I’ve written so much about this in my journals over the years, wrestling with God and myself in these areas. Our daughter already knows to handle with understanding the pages of angst about our marriage. She would probably be the only one who will read them. The best part is she has seen us pull together more than pull apart.
I’ve often quoted Elisabeth Elliot on love and marriage. Two thoughts come to mind. She speaks of love as being “a laid-down life.” She also talks of marriage as being good for Christians to mature in their walk with God, because [in marriage] “there’s so much scope for sinning.” My husband has taught me a lot in both of these areas, and I, him – hopefully more on the lines of laying down our lives for each other, rather than the scope for sinning part…sigh.
Whatever these nearing forty years have produced with us together, the best of it has been 3 great young people (and the extra children who’ve joined our family through them, so far)…and GRANDCHILDREN! Alongside those treasures is the unalterable way the Lord has knit us together, my husband and me, with each other and with Him.
I have some idea what is ahead, given our ages and the world around us (we’ve already been through a cancer diagnosis, big job changes, losses of dear parents, and sickness in our children and grandchildren). The hard is softened by what is promised (and proven) through God’s Word. Whatever is ahead, I am so grateful for what I’ve learned through this man who married me 37 years ago.
He has given me a face of one who does not give up, of one who fights for what is right, of one who is tender toward the weak, of one who loves no matter what. I have been both the recipient of this and the one on his side as he extends himself to others.
Now, we are two again…as in the beginning of our relationship. Yet we are at a very different place. God has shown Himself to be ever-present in all these years of our lives. For many years I didn’t think marriage was to be mine…then Dave came into my life quite providentially. God gave me exactly what I needed in this husband of mine – a man as true as steel in his walk with God and with his family. We count on him; he counts on God. Whatever happens out there in front of us…I have peace, on this 37th anniversary, that God will be there for each of us, to show us how to live…as He has in all these years thus far.
1) A City Tour – Have you ever taken a tour of your city or town? It’s a transformative experience. We toured our city (Richmond, Virginia) this week. No pictures of the James River this time around or any of the actual “tourist sites”…[I did write about our gorgeous Capitol building visit here]. Just neighborhoods this time. What about you? Comment below about your city/town.
2) Best Organizing Tips – OK, full disclosure: I’m not a fan of Marie Kondo (link to my blog on decluttering and relationships). I think what she helps people downsize gets repurchased. So it is a constant cycle. However, I get the stress that clutter can bring to moms of small children. Our children understand that I will downsize until it starts getting painful, and then they can just hire an estate clearing company, for the rest one day.
When I come across an article that shows wisdom in dealing with the strain of stuff, it encourages and empowers. The Pioneer Woman has a list of 76 tips for organizing our households. Some of the tips have affiliate marketing attached which means buying stuff to store your stuff. Still, among the 76 tips, there are great helps for anyone. I love the ideas on beautifying and functionalizing the foyer/entryway of a home. Also, her tips on managing toys and their cleanup were great!
3) Rise and Fall of Mars Hill – I don’t usually recommend sad things unless it causes such a stir in me, it seems necessary to share. The church doesn’t belong to people. The church belongs to God. He established it, and He will care for it. If judgment is required, He will judge. However, some situations may need to be examined, not to judge, but to avoid going there. We are all vulnerable. It can happen to any of us as collections of people. Power and ego can soil anyone. None of us are immune.
Our small but growing church in Richmond, Virginia, loves God, loves His Word, and loves the world. Hopefully we love each other and our neighbors as well. We will want to do our part in keeping our church on track with God’s mission.
Mission drift can occur to any organization. Watch out for it. Put guardrails around what matters.
4) On Being Heard – Just before doing the city tour above, a documentary focused on our city was recommended to me. The local film company responsible for this Emmy-award-winning gem is Belltower Pictures.
“Heard”– PBS Documentary – “HEARD captures the inspiring stories of five people who grew up in ‘the projects’ (Richmond, Va.), surviving and thriving in spite of, and often because of, the challenges they’ve had to overcome. Now they’re giving back to their home communities, trying to make a better life for those who come behind.”
I watched this documentary after the city tour.
It was an amazing opportunity to listen to residents of Richmond’s subsidized housing who talk about what they loved and hated about their neighborhoods and how they were able to take those foundations to launch into positive futures. So glad I listened. You will be, too.
1) Loki Theme on Classical Guitar – Twice a month a video. Nathan Mills (Beyond the Guitar) drops two classical guitar arrangements every month. Twice a month. It’s a happy time when that happens. Here’s his arrangement of the main theme from Marvel Studio’s Loki. Enjoy.
2) Farm to Table – Summer in this part of the world is a feast of flavors and colors as farm harvests come in. Markets abound and we reap all the good.
3) The Color of Law – Much of my adult life, I’ve lived in cities – Atlanta, New Haven, Cairo, Tunis, Casablanca, and now, Richmond, Virginia. Cities are where our children grew up. Amazing experiences for us all. Now we, who own homes, live in the suburbs. Last week I had the great privilege of hearing educator Sara Kennedy talk about the history of Richmond, Virginia. Particularly the history of the last 150 years or so. In just over an hour, she talked through the many laws, ordinances, and covenants put in place to seemingly protect the growth of the white middle class. Also to stifle or curtail the socioeconomic flourishing of African Americans in our country. In particular home ownership. How in the world? Through federal, state, and local laws. Kennedy explored all of this without shaming or judging those in the room…just talked about the laws, the impact on urban quality of life, and…”the color of law”.
Last year, I watched the 13th documentary about the abolition of slavery. It was hard to watch because, over and over, I had to take a breath, shake my head, and acknowledged to myself, “I didn’t know.”
“The core argument of this book is that African Americans were unconstitutionally denied the means and the right to integration in middle-class neighborhoods, and because this denial was state-sponsored, the nation is obligated to remedy it.”
“If government had declined to build racially separate public housing in cities where segregation hadn’t previously taken root, and instead had scattered integrated developments throughout the community, those cities might have developed in a less racially toxic fashion, with fewer desperate ghettos and more diverse suburbs. If the federal government had not urged suburbs to adopt exclusionary zoning laws, white flight would have been minimized because there would have been fewer racially exclusive suburbs to which frightened homeowners could flee.”
“We have created a caste system in this country, with African Americans kept exploited and geographically separate by racially explicit government policies. Although most of these policies are now off the books, they have never been remedied and their effects endure.”
Read the book. Until you are able to do so, start, as I did, with Goodreads quotes of The Color of Law. Mind-blowing.
I’m learning. Not taking responsibility for the wrong of previous generations, but taking in the why’s that such division (in our city, in particular) still exists. Change is difficult but not impossible.
“Heard”– PBS Documentary – “HEARD captures the inspiring stories of five people who grew up in ‘the projects’ (Richmond, Va.), surviving and thriving in spite of, and often because of, the challenges they’ve had to overcome. Now they’re giving back to their home communities, trying to make a better life for those who come behind.”
“Speak up, speak out, get in the way. Get in good trouble, necessary trouble, and help redeem the soul of America.”
If there was ever a person who turned our world upside down with something that could be termed “good trouble”, it was Jesus of Nazareth. In fact, the recent multi-season TV series The Chosen on the life of Christ has as its theme song “Trouble”.
Surely my soul remembers and is humbled within me. Yet I call this to mind, and there I have hope: Because of the loving devotion of the LORD we are not consumed, for His mercies never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness! “The LORD is my portion,” says my soul, “therefore I will hope in Him.” The LORD is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him. It is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD. – Lamentations 3:21-26
We need to teach our little ones how to lament. Otherwise, those children (especially bent toward the cup being less than half full or entirely empty) will develop habits of being sullen or inconsolable. In fact, as our children grow into adulthood, knowing how to lament will be a worship tool for handling all the painful and seemingly unfair losses.
What is Biblical lament? Its definition is, in Hebrew, “to passionately cry out, to wail, to express sorrow, to mourn, to express regret”.
“We live in a fallen world. We experience the consequences of sin and death on individual, cultural, and global levels. God knows we need a way to express and release the pain of these losses or we risk becoming numb to even the joys of life or allowing momentary sorrows to infect our entire being. The tool He’s provided for this release is lamentation.” – Lori Stanley Roeleveld
Yesterday I was spending the afternoon with our 5y/o and 3 y/o sibling grandchildren. We had a schedule, and they both understood it. Then the 3 y/o decided to change up the schedule. His strategy was to be miserable and make his sister and Gram miserable as well. He was successful. I don’t do sullen well at all. [My own struggle with responding to inconsolable children needs its own blog. Surely, I can do better.] The afternoon finished out fine enough, but we were all three worse the wear on feeling bad and making each other feel bad. Thankful for another day of learning to love well these precious ones.
Through the evening, I was reminded of my own children’s struggle with hardship and losses and how their dad and I tried to help them navigate them, growing up. Our sweet daughter’s struggle with our many moves, leaving friends behind and forced to start over in new places. Our darling youngest son who was different different (being both American and Korean living in Africa), and sometimes endured hard attention from other children. Our talented older son when his heart broke, not making the soccer team as a middle schooler.
[Sidebar: When this loss accentuated our son’s struggles later on his high school basketball team, we understood there would be dark times. Dave remembered last night about us giving him an after-dinner back yard task of 100 completed free throws. I can’t believe now that he actually went along with us. Hot, mad, and sweaty, he shot and shot until he got those 100 successful attempts. His confidence grew through the season with his practiced proficiency.]
Our sullenness and inconsolable hearts must have their origins in entitlement. This is something we fought against with our children from toddler-hood. Still it creeps in (to all our lives). Life should be better for us. Life should bring successes. Even for Christians, we are shocked, at times, when we suffer because we think it is not right. Not fair. [We never responded to that expression with our kids growing up. Just moved on. It might have been a teachable moment to sow lament in their hearts.]
Writer, pastor Mark Vroegop (in piece above) gives four elements of lament (from Psalm 13):
Turn to God. – Tell God what’s happening. Talk to Him about everything about it, including how you feel.
Bring your complaint. – Tell Him what’s frustrating you. All of it. He can take the struggle you are having.
Ask boldly for help. – Don’t give into silence and despair. Ask Him for help. “Dare to hope.”
Choose to trust. – “But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me.” (Psalm 13:5–6). More than the stages of grief, this prayer language moves us to renew our commitment to trust in God as we navigate the brokenness of life.
Lament is definitely something we can choose as we walk with God. Teaching our children to turn their struggle away from themselves and toward God will move them to maturity. Just this week that basketballer son of ours gave counsel to treating perceived failure with perspective and perseverance. A good word for anyone.
For today, let’s turn our longing, our ache, our sorrow into a lament and a praise. Allow gratitude to flatten our fear. Worship with me with the help of this great old hymn that I’ve referenced before (see links below). Remember that our beloved Comforter, and Consoler, is ever and always faithful:
Great is thy faithfulness, O God my Father;
there is no shadow of turning with thee;
thou changest not, thy compassions, they fail not;
as thou hast been thou forever wilt be.
Refrain:
Great is thy faithfulness!
Great is thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see:
all I have needed thy hand hath provided–
Great is thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!
Summer and winter and springtime and harvest,
sun, moon, and stars in their courses above
join with all nature in manifold witness
to thy great faithfulness, mercy, and love. [Refrain]
Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth, thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide, strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow, blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside! [Refrain]*
“I offer thanks to You, living and eternal King, for You have mercifully restored my soul within me; Your faithfulness is great.” – The Traditional Jewish Prayer Upon Awaking
Though the fig tree may not blossom, Nor fruit be on the vines; Though the labor of the olive may fail, And the fields yield no food; Though the flock may be cut off from the fold, And there be no herd in the stalls— Yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will joy in the God of my salvation.
The Lord God is my strength; He will make my feet like deer’s feet, And He will make me walk on my high hills. – Habakkuk 3:17-19
Reading the book of Habakkuk, we are spellbound by the devastating situation where the people of God find themselves. Habakkuk wrestles with God over this, and finally yields in faith to the God he trusts…no matter what. Whether in hunger or high places.
The thought of being completely without food is pretty frightening. The stories we hear in the news of displaced peoples, who had to flee their homes and villages and figure out how to survive on foot, are heartbreaking. I can’t fathom that situation, yet I know it’s real for far too many right now.
I’m also afraid of heights. When we fly, I always get an aisle seat, and treat the experience as if I’m on a cross-country bus trip. I love to look at mountains, but being up in them, on narrow roads or cliff-edge paths, is not what I would choose for transportation or relaxation.
Reading through the short account of desperate times, as recorded by the prophet Habakkuk, reminds me of the raw nature of life sometimes. What is that situation for you that would be the worst you could imagine? The loss of a person or the lack of a provision?
Is there anything that could so devastate me that I would take my eyes off God?
I pray not…and Habakkuk gives hope. He cried out to God, cried out against God, in the beginning, because of the horrific circumstances of his people, God’s people. Yet, when we besiege the throne of God with our desperate requests, He hears His children and answers us. Not always in ways that suit us at the time, but He responds, with the wisdom of One who sees how all of life, all of history, fits together.
As we pray, whatever He does in answer to our appeals is up to Him – a perfectly loving, merciful and just God. Yet, there is a glorious spiritual transaction that happens, if we keep our eyes on Him. He restores our joy; He brings peace; He gives strength.
I love the passage in C. S. Lewis’ The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobewhere Mr. and Mrs. Beaver are trying to describe Aslan, the lion who symbolizes Jesus in the Narnia stories. Lucy and Susan ask if Aslan is safe. Mr. Beaver responds, “Who said anything about safe? ‘Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good. He’s the King, I tell you.”
God is completely good. That does not mean that He keeps us always in comfortable places. His ways are not our ways (Isaiah 55:8-9). Yet, as we look over the shoulders of Habakkuk, and see the world as he saw it…he still came around to seeing the goodness of God. We can also choose to rejoice in whatever situation we find ourselves. That is the faith that plants our feet surely on any path where God leads.
[Here we are two days post Juneteenth and one day post Father’s Day. What’s on my mind? Recovering from a bad fall with back pain slowly dissipating, and its resultant writer’s block. Hard to sit at a computer and write with brain drain from this pain.
However, the pain is improving…and inspiration is returning. In fact, the weekend’s events have spurred so many thoughts and emotions.]
This morning, I slowly rolled out of bed with so many thoughts pinging around my mind…thoughts and accompanying emotions. Then, as happens sometimes, a song, and the question in its title, settled in my brain.
“How Can You Mend a Broken Heart?”
Whether the Bee Gee’s epic original or Al Green’s amazing cover. Here’s a more recent Bee Gee’s performance (2001):
Even when our hearts are not presently under attack, we share space with those we love whose hearts are breaking. A dear friend whose husband wants another future. A friend who spent his Father’s Day without his children (because his ex-wife chose a different future). .Friends who lost their fathers before this Father’s Day…or parents who lost their children (whether to death or to an estranged life). Friends heartbroken over the what-ifs or what-may-never-be’s. Fill in the blank with your own. #BrokenHearts.
[Too heavy for a Monday morning? It does get better.]
Maybe you aren’t so aware of broken hearts. Maybe you haven’t had the experience of sitting on the phone of a friend scream-weeping at the hard reality of her life right now. Maybe you haven’t worked beside a friend whose stone face and deep quiet haven’t touched your awareness of what is going on under the surface of his silence…his pain.
Broken hearts can take us on spirals that lead to self-protective withdrawal, confused anger, terrifying isolation, or hard bitterness.Photo Credit: AZ Quotes
I also found some helps in a somewhat odd place: Kristin Weber‘s Adulting for Jesus. Whatever you currently think about Jesus, this book on adulting is refreshing, funny sometimes, and so real. Midway of the book she talks about developing something she calls godly grit.
“Adulting requires learning how to fall and get back up again, and again, and again.” – Adulting for Jesus, p. 89
Weber presents 10 ways to shift perspective on the struggle (our heartbreak) and develop that grit:
Expect hardship. – “Western comforts have lulled us into the false assumption that life is meant to be easy and the hard moments few. In reality, much of life is hard, and the easy moments are the exceptions.” We can learn to live in such a way that difficult situations/relationships don’t catch us off guard.
Depend on God. – “…when a relationship [ends] abruptly, failure hurts – often deeply. We can be honest about our hurt and struggles while still trusting God.” We don’t ignore the pain of our broken heart, but we recognize that God hasn’t gone anywhere. He sees; He hears; He will work on our behalf.
Ask “What’s Next?” – “Rather than ask ‘Why me?’…ask a different question about life: ‘What’s next?’ Obstacles, especially a long string of them, can make us short-sighted. By asking ‘What’s next?’ we recognize this failure or hardship isn’t the end of our story…Hardships will undoubtably change you, but keeping a long-term perspective will prevent them from destroying you.”
Look at Adversity through Eternal Lenses. – “As a child of God your trials, both big and small, have an expiration date.” When our hearts are broken, we are consumed and exhausted by our loss. We can’t see down the road but so far. “Do the next thing”. Eternity comes but until then we grieve the loss, but we also train ourselves to stay in the moment and hope for a better future…a different future. We have that confidence in God’s care.
Appreciate the Bottom. – “A lot can be learned on the bottom step of the ladder”. Our broken hearts can bring us low…but that is not where we stay. That is not where we belong.
Develop Thick Skin and a Tender Heart. – “Try to be slow in getting offended and quick in extending grace. If someone causes you to have a knee-jerk reaction, that person controls you. That person has all the power…Choosing a calm response and keeping a level head, you remain free to live your life.”
Be Teachable. – “Though we don’t need to let the opinions and critiques of everyone we encounter control our lives, we do need people who can lovingly speak truth into our lives…Our natural instinct is to make excuses or get defensive when someone corrects us, but adopting an attitude of teachability puts us on the track to growth and maturity. We need to take ownership of our actions and be humble enough to receive input about where we can improve.”
Do Something. – “Big changes happen through tiny actions, and tiny actions require doing something.” Every day…step by step. #MakeYourBed.
Laugh. – “Once I learned to laugh at myself and find humor in situations that didn’t tip in my favor, I became less stressed and anxious about every little thing. I didn’t dread life or failure as much…Our hope isn’t ultimately in everything going our way, and humor keeps the weight of our circumstances from crushing us.”
Count Your Blessings. – “Instead of focusing constantly on everything that’s going wrong, take time each day to remember what’s going right. We might find our ‘gratitude attitude’ changes our entire outlook on life.”
Thanks, Kristin. I can tell you’ve known heartbreak and have learned to come out whole on the other side.
Closing out this Monday Morning Moment, for those of us who are sharing space with one or many dealing with broken hearts, we need to remember its pain, and have patience and compassion…be present, listen, and, when we can, speak the truth in love.
P.S. The Scripture verses are strong anchors and the links below are super helpful. None of us are in these broken spaces alone.
The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. – Psalm 34:18
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. – Psalm 73:26
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. – Psalm 147:3
“I have chosen you and haven’t rejected you. Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be afraid, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. – Isaiah 41:9b-10
“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” – Jesus – Matthew 11:28-30
Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the gospel, and not frightened in anything by your opponents. This is a clear sign to them of their destruction, but of your salvation, and that from God. – the Apostle Paul to the Philippian Church Philippians 1:27-28
God’s Word is powerful and freeing. We are emboldened and sustained by it – for life, for love, for forgiveness, for endurance.
Reading this passage recently, a charge from these words sizzled through me like electricity. Goosebumps and all.
Another translation of Paul’s writing introduced the above Scripture passage with the phrase “Just one thing”. We are living in confusing and shaky times, but God is unchanged. His truth is as riveting and reliable as when first written for us.
For months now, we have been kept apart by the social distancing of COVID-19. A year ago, we were brought together by the terrible loss of George Floyd. Brought together and at the same time torn apart. Protests and a pandemic. Racial unrest and a radical disease.
This time last year, a group of friends and I went through a Bible study together which turned out to be incredibly timely. We couldn’t be together so we met over a video call, working through Jennie Allen‘s Get Out of Your Head. In this book, Allen talks through our struggle with the kinds of thoughts that spiral downward taking us with them. The text she takes her readers through is Paul’s letter to the Philippians. He was in prison and yet wrote this short life-transforming letter to encourage the church experiencing its own hardship.
In confusing and chaotic times, our thoughts can be our worst enemy. We juggle the “what if’s” until they become more than we can manage. We question what’s right, what’s true, what’s our place in all of it…what’s God’s place. We become suspicious of others’ motives, and even sometimes our own. We grow weary of sorting it all out. We can withdraw…making six feet apart way too easy.
Jennie Allen reminds us that we have a choice; we can flip the downward spiral. We can make our aim, in all things,God’s glory and His headship. Keeping our focus on God, we then seek peace, do justice, love even our enemies, and trust God with our lives (whether the threat is COVID and or violence in the streets).
“As theologian and emeritus professor D. A. Carson has observed, People do not drift toward holiness. Apart from grace-driven effort, people do not gravitate toward godliness, prayer, obedience to Scripture, faith, and delight in the Lord. We drift toward compromise and call it tolerance; we drift toward disobedience and call it freedom; we drift toward superstition and call it faith. We cherish the indiscipline of lost self-control and call it relaxation; we slouch toward prayerlessness and delude ourselves into thinking we have escaped legalism; we slide toward godlessness and convince ourselves we have been liberated.” – Jennie Allen
So how do we avoid that drift Dr. Carson talked about above?
In community.Standing firm, side by side, not afraid – in God’s strength and His salvation – Philippians 1:27-28.
However, even if community is shaky, God never is. We remind ourselves and each other that He is our refuge and we never have to be shaken...no matter the situation.
I am at rest in God alone; my salvation comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my stronghold; I will never be shaken.
How long will you threaten a man? Will all of you attack as if he were a leaning wall or a tottering fence? They only plan to bring him down from his high position. They take pleasure in lying; they bless with their mouths, but they curse inwardly. Selah
Rest in God alone, my soul, for my hope comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my stronghold; I will not be shaken. My salvation and glory depend on God, my strong rock. My refuge is in God. Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts before Him. God is our refuge.Selah
Common people are only a vapor; important people, an illusion. Together on a scale, they weigh less than a vapor. Place no trust in oppression or false hope in robbery. If wealth increases, don’t set your heart on it.
God has spoken once; I have heard this twice: Strength belongs to God, and faithful love belongs to You, Lord. For You repay each according to his works. – Psalm 62
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